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Search Ned Martin’s Amused
Ned Martin’s Amused Pages
- Board Games, ImageryMarry Me
- Scrabble Edition.
- Animated, Illusion, ImageryTwo Person Optical Illusion
- Optical illusion: Keep your eyes on the cross, and see what happens.
- Animals, Dogs, ImageryAchilles’ Heel
- You got a dog?! Yup! His name is Achilles…
- Bananas, Food, Hats, ImageryBanana Hat
- Banana hat…
- Computer Games, Geeky, Imagery, TechnologyCombo Hit: Streetfighter Style
- Combo Hit: Streetfighter Style
- Jewish, RacistBacon Tree
- Back in cowboy times, a westbound wagon train was lost and low on food…
- ☺Out Of Breath
- Dispatcher: Emergency Services, how may I help you?
- Imagery, Tools, Work, ZombiesIn Case Of Zombies
- In case of zombies… or yard work…
- Army, WarAmerican Nun
- A deserter GI was running down a road escaping from two MPs…
- Imagery, PoliticalWill Be President For Food
- Boy sitting next to sign “No Campaigning beyond This Point” holding sign “Will Be President for Food”.
- Elderly, Hearing Aids, ImageryExpensive Hearing Aid
- A man was telling his neighbour, “I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it’s state of the art. It’s perfect.”
- Australia, History, RacistA Brief History Of Australia
- Australia was founded in 1901 by Jimmy “Crocodile” Austral, a deportee of England who was banished for cannibalism, having eaten 32 members of the House of Lords. In accordance with English colonial law, this entitled him to an entire already-inhabited continent.
- Geeky, SexistDear Tech Support
- Girlfriend technical support…
- ImagerySuperman’s Social Network Nightmare
- Superman’s Social Network Nightmare.
- Art, Imagery, RenaissanceYou Weren’t Even Listening Just Now, Were You?
- You weren’t even listening just now, were you? What a weird way to start a conversation.
- Alcohol, Imagery, Irish, RacistIrish Yoga
- Irish Yoga.
- Animated, ImageryA Teaser
- You must stare very closely at the door in this image for around 30 seconds…
- Daleks, Dr Who, Food, Garlic, Imagery, TvGarlek
- Garlek.
- Computers, Geeky, ItComputer Quotes
- Computer quotes.
- Imagery, RacistHas One Night Stand
- Has one night stand, but way too many books to fit on it.
- Comics, Imagery, VeganI Am Going Vegan
- I am going vegan
- ImageryStatistics That Matter: The Pie Chart
- A new take on the traditional pie… chart.
- Imagery, Ocd, ShirtsI Have CDO. It’s Like OCD But All The Letters Are In Alphabetical Order.
- I have CDO. It’s like OCD but all the letters are in alphabetical order. As they should be.
- Doctors, HospitalsFinding Information In Hospital
- A sweet grandmother telephoned St. Joseph’s Hospital…
- Jewellery, Jokes, Puns, RingsSomeone Stole My Mood Ring
- Someone stole my mood ring.
- Astronauts, Coronavirus, Imagery, Nasa, SpaceCoronavirus Space Crew
- Congratulations, your mission is now complete. You may return to Earth.
- Fish, Imagery, MermaidsReverse Mermaid
- You are alone on an uninhabited island. Which of these would you choose as your companion?
- ☺A Middle-aged Woman Decides To Have A Facelift…
- A middle-aged woman decides to have a facelift…
- Cooking, Frypans, ImageryNon-stick Frypan
- A stuck non-stick frypan…
- ImageryTimes Have Changed
- An image from an operating manual for the SAGE air defense system
- Children, Grace, PrayersSix Year Old Praying
- A mother invited some people to dinner…
- Animals, Apples, Cats, Imagery, MathSeven Cats
- If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?
- Aboriginal, Australia, RacistAboriginal Eggs
- Two Aboriginal lads are riding along the Hume Highway on a motorbike…
- America, Imagery, Obama, PoliticalBarack Obama: What I Actually Do
- Barack Obama: What I actually do.
- Imagery, RisquéPull Out & Save
- Save up to $600!
- America, Congress, Imagery, It Crowd, PoliticalCongress: Have You Tried Turning It Off And On Again?
- Congress: have you tried turning it off and on again?
- Alcohol, ChemistryAlcohol Is A Solution
- Not to get technical but according to chemistry alcohol is a solution.
- Imagery, PiracyPiracy Is Not Theft
- Imagine your car gets stolen, but it’s still there in the morning.
- Imagery, Mobiles, Mouse Traps, Phones, TelstraCustomer Retention
- Free Phone Telstra Style.
- Animals, Cats, DogsCats And Dogs
- As seen in a dog’s diary…
- Animals, Australia, Dangerous, ImageryDangerous Australia
- It’s no wonder we all live here…
- ImageryAll Images
- All Images
- Adobe, Geeky, Imagery, UpdatesAdobe Updates
- I don’t always have an update…
- Imagery, Mafia, RecruitersRecruiters Are One Step Above The Mafia
- Recruiters are one step above the Mafia…
- Chinese, Imagery, Racist, Tattoos, WomenIf Chinese People Tattooed Lame English Words On Themselves…
- If Chinese people tattooed lame English words on themselves…
- Imagery, SnowDead Snowmen
- Gruesomely dead snowmen.
- Animated, Chris Coutts, Flash, Imagery, No Effort OnlineChris Coutts: No Effort Online: What Does Suxor Mean?
- Chris Coutts: No Effort Online flash animations
- Apple, Apples, Computers, Food, Imagery, Laptops, TechnologyMake Your Own Apple Laptop
- Make your own Apple laptop the cheap—and healthy—way!
- Imagery, PhotographyOlympus Fights Back
- Olympus Fights Back: Canon versus Olympus
- Food, ImageryBreakfast Alive
- What happens if you wait too long before eating your breakfast?
- Apple, Computers, Geeky, Linux, Mac, WindowsHow To Fix Any Computer
- A comprehensive guide to fixing any computer.
- Imagery, RedneckRedneck Ingenuity
- Redneck Ingenuity: Shoes for tyres.
- Food, Imagery, ThymeToo Much Thyme On My Hands
- I’ve got way too much tyme on my hands.
- MedicalSeek And Find You…
- I shall seek and find you…
- Animals, Imagery, RacoonsOh… Hi… Umm… Meow?
- Oh… hi… Umm… meow?
- ImageryApostrophe, Catastrophe
- Apostrophe, Catastrophe.
- Imagery, Self-help, SexSex Maniac
- Dear Dr Ruth, I’m writing to tell you my problem. It seems I have been married to a sex maniac for the past 22 years…
- Geeky, Imagery, Microsoft, Microsoft OfficeMicrosoft Office Suite Pass Key
- Does anyone have an extra Microsoft Office suite pass key?
- Computers, Imagery, Passwords, TechnologyNew Password Can’t Be Old Password
- Enter password. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong…
- Bugs Bunny, Cartoons, Daffy Duck, Donald Duck, Goofy, Imagery, Looney Tunes, Mickey Mouse, Porky Pig, Road Runner, Tom And Jerry, Wile E CoyoteJust To Make You Feel Really Old
- Just to make you feel really old…
- Birds, Imagery, RavensWhere Have You Been All Weekend?
- Where have you been all weekend? Out Raven.
- Apple, Boobs, Fashion, Imagery, Ios, Risqué, ShirtsSlide To Unlock
- A woman wearing a shirt: Slide to Unlock.
- Animated, Fighting, Imagery, WweThrown Out Of The Ring
- Thrown out of the Ring.
- Animals, Bikes, Frogs, Imagery, Kermit The FrogWrong Way
- Wrong Way
- ImageryBefore Tweeting
- In case of fire: Exit building before tweeting about it.
- English, VegetablesThe Correct Way To Spell Potato
- The correct way to spell potato is “GHOUGHPHTHEIGHTTEEAU”.
- Imagery, Toilet PaperToilet Paper
- A piece of toilet paper saving another piece…
- Blacks, Imagery, RacistBlacks For Sale
- They can still do that?
- Animals, Fish, Imagery, Love, Romance, SmsAnyways, Best Of Luck Finding Your Fish
- Long story short, we’re in love. I know it seems sudden but life is sudden like that, you know? Anyways, best of luck finding your fish.
- Imagery, StoneNothing Is Written In Stone
- Nothing is Written in Stone…
- Computers, Geeky, ItStar Trek TNG Meets Microsoft
- Star Trek TNG Meets Microsoft…
- PoliticalAbbott And Costello Go To Washington
- Abbott And Costello Go To Washington.
- Advertising, Imagery, Sexist, Sweaters, VintageMen Are Better Than Women!
- Indoors, women are useful — even pleasant. On a mountain they are something of a drag. So don’t go hauling them up a cliff…
- Imagery, PoliticalMad Magazine’s Boy Grows Up
- The boy from Mad Magazine morphing into George Bush.
- Australia, Games, Imagery, Logan, Monopoly, RacistLogan Monopoly
- Logan Monopoly…
- Imagery, Political, Politicians, Prostitutes, RisquéHonest Politician
- Hi! I’m 32. I’m a politician and I’m honest. Hi. I’m 29, I’m a prostitute and I’m a virgin.
- Computers, Geeky, ImageryWhenever I Have To Force Shutdown
- Whenever I have to force shutdown.
- Cars, Imagery, RacingTimes Were Tough Before The GoPro
- Times were tough before the GoPro…
- ImagerySmile
- Smile…
- Animals, Imagery, SpidersLet’s All Take A Moment And Be Thankful That Spiders Don’t Fly.
- Let’s all take a moment and be thankful that spiders don’t fly!
- Imagery, PinterestIf You Like It Then You Shoulda Put A Pin On It
- If you like it then you shoulda put a pin on it!
- Crocs, Imagery, Shoes, WeddingsWedding Crocs
- Wedding Crocs.
- Animals, Drugs, Imagery, RabbitsHigh Rabbits
- Two rabbits getting high on marijuana.
- Imagery, Phones, SmsStreet Name
- Hey, what’s your street name?
- ImageryAwkward Moment
- The awkward when you already said “moment” in your head before you read it.
- Animals, Dieting, DogsPurina Diet
- The Purina Pet Food Diet.
- Browsers, Chrome, Firefox, Geeky, Imagery, Internet, Internet ExplorerBrowser Wars
- Browser Wars: Chrome versus Firefox… and Internet Explorer…
- Alcohol, ImageryAlcohol Research
- Bum holding sign “Need Cash for Alcohol Research”.
- Illusion, ImageryShake Your Head
- Shake your head
- Imagery, Risqué, SupermanSuper Boner
- Super-boner: A super problem.
- Parties, WatchesNot On My Watch
- Lost my watch at a party once…
- Geeky, ImageryDied
- …from not forwarding that text message to 10 people.
- Bananas, Food, Imagery, ZucchinisGreen Banana
- Green banana…
- Computers, ImageryTimes Change
- …but other things don’t.
- Food, ImageryI Love The Smell Of Pixel In The Morning
- I Love the Smell of Pixel in the Morning…
- Horror MoviesIf You Are Lonely, Dim All Lights
- If you are lonely, dim all lights and put on a horror movie. After a while it won’t feel like you’re alone anymore.
- Australia, Cars, Floods, Imagery, MechanicalDunno Mate, Maybe She’s Flooded?
- Dunno mate, maybe she’s flooded?
- Animals, Camels, Children, Donkeys, ImageryYour Child Is Being Eaten By A Camel
- Your child is being eaten by a camel. Do you… a) Save your child, or b) Take a photo?
- ImageryFight Apathy
- …or don’t.
- Animals, Australia, Crocodiles, Emus, Imagery, Kangaroos, Koalas, Kookaburras, Police, Sharks, Spiders, Woolworths26 Everyday Occurrences In Australia
- When you live on a barely hospitable desert island that was once a continent-sized penal colony, your life tends to be a little more badass than the average person’s.
- Babies, Imagery, PregnancyPregnancy Tips
- Some useful pregnancy tips…
- Geeky, History, Internet, ItHow The Internet Started: A History Lesson
- How the Internet Started: A History Lesson.
- Advertising, Apple, Imagery, Iphone, Phones, TechnologyIPhone 10 – The Tallest IPhone Yet
- A mock-up of the iPhone 10, after the launch of the “taller” iPhone5.
- Sexist, WorkDon’t Copy If You Can’t Paste
- Don’t copy if you can’t paste…
- ImageryHard To Pay Fine
- Touching wires causes instant death…
- Alligators, Animals, Crocodiles, Imagery, TurtlesTurtle Cavalry
- Onward, alligator steed!
- Animals, Cats, Imagery, LionsA Cat With A Lion’s Mane Hat
- A cat with a lion’s mane hat.
- Animals, Dogs, Imagery, Werewolves, WolvesAware Wolf
- A werewolf. A wearwolf. A warewolf. Aware wolf.
- Banks, ImageryI Was Going To Make A Joke About A Bank, But Then I Lost Interest…
- I was going to make a joke about a bank, but then I lost interest…
- Coronavirus, Cruises, Face Masks, Imagery, Sunbathing, SunburnJust Back From Our Cruise. Had A Great Time.
- Just back from our cruise. Had a great time.
- Animated, ImagerySpiderman
- If Spiderman was a gay night-clubber…
- Boobs, Bsod, Computers, Fashion, Geeky, Imagery, Microsoft, Sexist, Shirts, Windows, WomenI Love My BSOD
- Perhaps the only blue screen of death geeks would be happy to see.
- SexistPerfect Riddle
- Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met…
- Animals, Books, Dolphins, Imagery, LibrariesTo Punch A Dolphin In The Mouth
- 5 very good reasons to punch a dolphin in the mouth.
- Flowcharts, Imagery, SexistHow To Argue With A Woman
- A flowchart.
- Computer Games, Imagery, Microsoft, XboxXbox One Vs. An Ordinary Brick
- Xbox One vs. An Ordinary Brick: Price, DRM Free, Requires Internet, Region Locked…
- Geeky, InternetUsing AOL? Mind If We LOL?
- Using AOL? Mind if we LOL?
- Animals, Dogs, ImageryI Forgot How To Dog
- I forgot how to dog
- Imagery, StovesCool Stoves
- Cool Stoves
- Australia, Democracy, Imagery, Political, RisquéAmazing Holes
- Amazing Holes from Around the World.
- Cars, Imagery, Logan, My Family Stickers, Racist, StickersLogan My Family Stickers
- Logan My Family Stickers.
- Australia, Condoms, New Zealand, Racist, RisquéAustralian Condoms
- New Zealand runs out of condoms…
- Animals, ImageryCat Legs
- There really isn’t much else to say about this.
- ImageryMartha Stewart’s New Digs
- Martha Stewart’s New Digs
- ImageryKermit Sees The Doctor
- Have a seat Kermit. What I’m about to tell you might come as a big shock…
- Communist, Computer Games, Geeky, ImageryA Case In Communism: The Super Mario Story
- A Case in Communism: The Super Mario Story.
- Animals, Cats, Dogs, ImageryDear Dog
- Dear Dog… a letter from the cat.
- America, Imagery, North Korea, Obama, RacistNorth Korea: I Will Destroy America
- North Korea: I will destroy America! Obama: Too late!
- Animals, Birds, Imagery, Mirrors, ParrotsTap That
- I’d tap that!
- Emergency, Imagery, Out Of OrderEmergency: Out Of Order
- Please do not have an emergency!
- Bananas, Chris Brown, Food, Imagery, RihannaChris Brown & Rihanna Bananas
- I can’t believe she didn’t press charges. It got worse when he posted the unpeeled photos of her.
- Imagery, MondaysShortest Horror Story: Monday
- Shortest horror story: Monday.
- Imagery, RisquéAncient Japanese Proverb
- Ancient Japanese Proverb. If you cannot understand Japanese, tilt your head to the right…
- Drugs, Food, ImageryEminem Drug Bust
- Eminem Drug Bust.
- Animals, Bunnies, Imagery, RabbitsEmo Bunny
- Emo bunny: No one ever understands him
- Africa, Animals, Cats, Imagery, Lions, TouristsThe Best Photo Caption
- A western woman in Africa—presumably a tourist—squats to go to the toilet in the bush, pants down, toilet paper in hand, her backpack in the grass nearby; unaware a lion is sneaking up behind her. Captioned “if she hasn’t… she will soon”.
- Animated, Flash, Geeky, ImageryL33t H4x0r R0m30 4nd Jul13t
- Tales for the L33T - ROMEO+JULIET
- Arthur C Clarke, Astrology, QuotationsI Don’t Believe In Astrology
- I don’t believe in astrology; I’m a Sagittarius and we’re sceptical.
- Cars, ReligiousRoad Rage
- Two cars were waiting at a stoplight. The light turned green, but the man didn’t notice it…
- Animals, Penguins, SleepIf Penguins Have Knees
- 3 out of 4 voices in my head want to sleep (the other wants to know if penguins have knees!)
- Imagery, TurtlesA Wee Turtle
- A wee turtle…
- Babies, Imagery, Kanye West, Kim Kardashian, Phones, Sms, Taylor Swift, TwitterYo I’m Happy For You And Imma Let You Finish But…
- [Twitter] Taylor Swift: @KimKardashian @kanyewest Yo I’m happy for you and imma let you finish but Beyonce had one of the best labours of all time.
- Asian, Facebook, Imagery, RacistHumans Of Sunnybank
- In Asia culture, it’s important for wife to trust husband and let him be the leader in the house. That’s why after I am married, I will always leave big decision to him – for example, choosing between buy me a Chanel for birthday or go sleep on sofa for a whole month instead.
- Imagery, RisquéThe Exact Spot My Zipper Broke
- The exact spot my zipper broke.
- Clippit, Imagery, Microsoft, Office, Paperclips, WorkIt Looks Like You Are Wasting Office Supplies. Would You Like Some Help?
- Clippit: It looks like you are wasting office supplies. Would you like some help?
- Stress, WorkStress Management
- A stress management technique recommended in all the latest psychological texts.
- Fonts, Imagery, Running, Sport, Usain BoltUsain Bold, Usain Italic
- Usain Bolt: Usain Bold, Usain Italic.
- Computer Games, Computers, ImageryPlay Outside
- It’s a beautiful day. I really want you to go outside and play.
- Animals, ImageryJust Checking
- “Just doing a spot-check to see what you’re doing… Yup, sitting at your computer again!” The expression on this ostrich’s face is excellent.
- Accidents, Buses, Imagery, Rivers, Wildlife DocumentariesA Wild Bus Drinking Water
- And here we see a wild bus drinking water from a river.
- Blonde, Cars, SexistBlondeStar
- What to do when you’re locked inside your car, and the keys are outside…
- Animals, ImageryGeneral Hierarchical Management Structure
- I’ve never seen a Flow Chart described so clearly.
- Animals, Australia, Emus, WarEmu War
- Result: Emu Victory.
- SexistEx Wife
- The police came to my front door last night holding a picture of my ex-wife…
- Animals, Australia, Cats, Horse Racing, Horses, Imagery, Jockeys, Melbourne Cup, SportMelbourne Cup Cat Horse
- Melbourne Cup Cat Horse.
- Animals, Imagery, SharksShark! What?
- Shark! What?
- WorkPhysical Fitness
- This department requires no physical fitness program.
- Beer, SexistA Beer Before It Starts
- A man came home from work, sat down in his favourite chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife, “Quick, bring me a beer before it starts”…
- America, Democracy, Imagery, TvWelcome To The USA
- The Government where the money’s made up and the debt doesn’t matter.
- Cars, ImageryHome Mechanics
- Home Mechanics and their cars.
- InternetMoronic Email Scam
- Nigerian spam…
- Animals, Imagery, WhalesThe Hey Whale
- The Hey Whale. It defies description.
- Ballerinas, Imagery, WomenFreshly Washed Ballerinas
- Freshly washed ballerinas.
- Geeky, ImageryCaps Lock
- A visual representation of the use of caps lock.
- Animals, Bears, Imagery, PenguinsDo One Brave Thing Today
- Do one brave thing today… then run like hell!
- Browsers, Chrome, Firefox, Geeky, Imagery, Internet, Internet ExplorerWhat Are We? Browsers!
- What are we? Browsers! What do we want? More speed! And when do we want it? Right now!
- AustraliaText Of A Letter From A Kid From Eromanga To Mum And Dad.
- Text of a letter from a kid from Eromanga to Mum and Dad.
- Boats, Imagery, Rowing, WarRow Row Row Your Boat
- Row row row your boat. Shut up Carl.
- Cars, Computer Games, ImageryLegend Of Zelda
- A legend… of Zelda.
- Imagery, SexistHusband Glasses
- I’m returning these glasses I bought for my husband. He’s still not seeing things my way.
- Cameras, Cannons, Imagery, NikonI Have A Cannon
- You have a Nikon? I have a Cannon.
- Imagery, Phones, SmsI Am Hungary
- I am Hungary…
- Australia, Condoms, New Zealand, Racist, RisquéKiwi Condoms
- Australia runs out of condoms…
- Bogans, Imagery, Iphone, SpeakersBogan Bass
- Bogan Bass: Yet somehow still better than Beats by Dr Dre.
- Blackjack, Cards, Games, ImageryBlack Jack Black
- Black Jack Black eating Cracker Jack playing a black jack while playing BlackJack with Jack Black who is threatening Black Jack Black with a Black Jack.
- Comics, Dancing, Imagery, Ireland, Irish, Irish DanceThe Book Of Irish Dance: Volume Two
- Whilst doing a long overdue clearout at the offices of Ireland’s oldest and most respected school of dance, Mrs O’Hara made a terrible discovery…
- Animals, Birds, Imagery, SeagullsSomebody Come Look At This
- Somebody Come Look at This
- Breakfast, ImageryHow Did You Get In My House?
- If I make you breakfast in bed, a simple “Thank you” is all I need. Not all this “How did you get in my house?” business.
- Angry Birds, Animals, Australia, Birds, Computer Games, ImageryAngry Birds Australia
- Angry Birds Australia…
- Beer, Imagery, RacistHow People From Around The World Open Beer
- People from around the world opening beer in their own unique ways.
- ImageryFingers Move
- I think you’re spending too much time on the computer. Your fingers move when you talk…
- Imagery, ToiletsWalked Into A Public Bathroom
- Walked into a public bathroom. Saw this and heard “hello?”
- Books, ImageryRead Your Book Case
- A bookcase worth reading.
- ImageryCockroach Cancer
- Please, don’t throw your cigarette butts on the floor…
- Risqué, SexistThe Perfect Password
- A woman was helping her husband set up his computer, and at the appropriate point in the process, the computer advised him that he would now need to enter a password…
- Guns, Imagery, ToastToast Toasts Toast?
- If guns don’t kill people, people kill people, does that mean…
- Advertising, Guns, Imagery, Revolvers, VintageIsn’t It Time You Gave Yourself A Christmas Gift?
- Isn’t it time you gave yourself a Christmas Gift?
- Forecasting, ImageryJohn’s Weather Forecasting Stone
- One of the most reliable ways of forecasting…
- Afghanistan, RacistInvestment Opportunity
- Investment Opportunity. Thought you might want to consider getting on board early.
- Daleks, Doctor Who, Geeky, RobotsWhat Would Robots From The 1960's…
- What would robots from 1960’s and 1970’s TV say today with current software installed?
- Acrobats, Books, ImageryAcrobat Reader
- An acrobat reader…
- Alcohol, Computers, Geeky, Imagery, Microsoft, WindowsWindows: File Missing
- Windows cannot find the file. Would you like some wine instead?
- Australia, Buses, Explosions, Imagery, InalaSorry For Party Rocking
- Sorry for Party Rocking: Driver jumps from burning bus, party bus explodes in Inala.
- Babies, ImageryWomb Service
- Hello, Womb Service? I’d like a double order of hot wings…
- Animals, Cats, ImageryPlease Don’t Let The Cat Out. No Matter What It Tells You!
- Please don’t let the cat out. No matter what it tells you!
- Highway Patrol, Police, Speeding, WorkcoverSweet Justice
- Workcover versus the police…
- Imagery, MathSeven Ate Nine
- Six, Seven, Ate, Nine…
- New Zealand, RacistKiwi Air Disaster
- New Zealand’s worst air disaster occurred earlier today…
- America, Imagery, Nsa, Obama, Phones, SpyingObama: “Aww No! Both Of You Hang Up!”
- Her: “Ok, you hang up.” Him: “No, you hang up.” Her: “Haha, no you hang up.” Obama: “Aww no! Both of you hang up!”
- Animals, Bugs, Flies, Imagery, Joke, MitesHey, Bug On My Back…
- Hey, bug on my back, are you a mite? I mite be. Stupidest pun I ever heard…
- SexistSocialize
- Men socialize by insulting each other…
- Australia, Imagery, Racist, Tintin, WynnumThe Adventures Of TinTin: TinTin In Wynnum
- The Adventures of TinTin: TinTin in Wynnum.
- Food, Imagery, Pasta, TrucksPasta Truck
- A pasta truck, or a very large pasta.
- Animals, Cats, Geeky, ImagerySchrödinger’s Cat
- Wanted: Dead & Alive…
- Elderly, MemoryElderly Memories
- An elderly couple had dinner at another couple’s house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen…
- Books, ImageryScary Campfire Stories: Book Style
- And then… after they had ripped out half of her pages… they turned her… into a movie!
- Geeky, InternetCannot Find The Damn File
- Cannot find the damn file…
- Irish, Racist, ReligiousAn Irish Daughter Had Not Been To Her Parent's House For Over Five Years...
- An Irish daughter had not been to her parent’s house for over five years…
- Homework, Imagery, SchoolSelf Referencing Homework
- What has been your greatest accomplishment so far?
- Animals, Dogs, ImageryDog Queue
- Sometimes, even dogs have to queue…
- Advertising, Cooking, Imagery, Sexist, VintageCook – That’s What Wives Are For!
- The Chef does everything but cook – that’s what wives are for!
- Animals, Cats, Ducks, Imagery, Robots, Sharks, VacuumsRobot Vacuum Cat Shark Duck Chase
- Robot Vacuum Cat Shark Duck Chase.
- Apple, Computers, Decals, Imagery, Laptops, Mac, Macbook, Stickers, TechnologyCreative Apple MacBook Stickers
- A collection of creative Apple MacBook stickers & decals.
- Animals, Cats, Imagery, SmsCat Facts
- Thanks for signing up for Cat Facts!
- Animals, Birds, Imagery, Notices, Parrots, SignsParrot BBQ
- Parrot Lost: Parrot BBQ!
- Explosions, Guns, ImageryTold Her Not To Brag About Her Barbie Dream House…
- Told her not to brag about her barbie dream house…
- GeekySpellcheck Not Needed
- Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy…
- Religious, RisquéSisters Of St Francis
- Sisters of St. Francis House of Prostitution…
- Animals, Cars, Children, Girls, Horses, ImageryNo Pony For Christmas
- No pony for Christmas? No window for driving!
- Animals, Dogs, ImageryA Little Hand
- I wish you could give me a little hand…
- Imagery, SexistHow Could You Be So Insensitive?
- How Could You Be So Insensitive? This is what it looks like from the other person’s perspective.
- English, ImageryYou You Read The First Line Wrong?
- What if I told you you read the first line wrong?
- SexistAustralia And Mateship
- Mateship amongst Men & Women: The differences…
- Birds, Imagery, WifiHe’s Got Wifi
- Three birds sitting on a wire, a fourth sitting in mid air. He's got wifi.
- Blonde, SexistBlonde Betting
- A very attractive blonde woman arrived at a Vegas casino…
- Alcohol, Animated, Fire, Imagery, Racist, Russia, SneezingIn Russia People Sneeze Fire
- In Russia people sneeze fire after drinking lots of vodka.
- America, France, Ireland, Irish, Racist, RisquéThe Penis Study
- The American Government funded a study to see why the head of a man’s penis was larger than the shaft…
- Geeky, Imagery, InternetYour Computer Is Broadcasting Your IP...
- Your computer is broadcasting your IP over the Internet…
- Easter, Eggs, ImageryDye Job
- Check out the dye job on her? Tramp!
- Animals, Gorillas, Imagery, King Kong, Mobiles, Phones, VodafoneNo Signal
- The “Vodafone Effect”.
- PilotsBlind Pilots
- You know, Bob, one of these days, they’re going to scream too late, and we’re all gonna die…
- Cars, ImageryAbove The Law Like A Boss
- Above the law like a boss: removing a wheel clamp.
- Imagery, RisquéSave Paper
- Save paper…
- Marriage, Religious, Sexist, WivesGood & Obedient Wives
- And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world…
- Biology, Imagery, MathBiology, Multiplication And Division
- Biology – the only science where multiplication and division mean the same thing…
- Cars, Imagery, PetrolThe Bank Account Gas Ratio
- The depressing ratio between your bank account, and your gas tank.
- Canada, Flutes, Imagery, SignsCanada Has A Serious Epidemic
- Protect yourself and others from the flute.
- C Sharp, Developers, Geeky, Imagery, Java, ProgrammersWhy Do Java Developers Wear Glasses?
- Why do Java developers wear glasses? Because they don’t C#!
- Canada, Imagery, NoticesCanadian Security
- Canadian Security: It may seem rude but for security reasons please do not open the door to strangers.
- Imagery, Political, Snowden, Spying, WikileaksEdward Snowden Buys A Plane Ticket From Moscow To Havana…
- Snowden buys a plane ticket from Moscow to Havana. Over 30 journalists pay last-minute airfare for a ticket on the same flight. The doors shut, the plane takes off, and [Edward] Snowden is not on the plane. It’s a 16-hour flight.
- Imagery, Jealousy, Relationships, SmsBaby Are You Jealous?
- Baby are you jealous?
- Australia, Coronavirus, Political, Politicians, Scott MorrisonConfirmed Case Of Corona
- Hey babe, just thought you should know there’s a confirmed case of corona in our neighbourhood…
- Animals, Imagery, RisquéHow To Eat Pussy…
- How to eat pussy…
- ImageryFurniture Training
- Furniture training for one of their main purposes in life…
- Engineering, Flowcharts, Geeky, ImageryEngineering Flowchart
- Nothing duct tape and WD-40 can’t fix…
- ☺Pages By Date
- A list of all the pages, sorted by their last updated or creation dates.
- Alcohol, Imagery, Marriage, WineSecrets To A Long, Happy Marriage
- An old woman was sipping on a glass of wine…
- Grammar, SpellingYou Read That Wrong
- That awkward moment when you read that wrong…
- England, Imagery, UkAnarchy In The UK
- Would you like some tea?
- Balloons, Cars, ImageryMissile Balloons
- Missile Balloons.
- Computer Games, ImageryVideo Games Don’t Make Us Violent – Lag Does!
- Video games don’t make us violent – lag does!
- Animals, Jokes, Puns, Racing, SnailsI Took The Shell Off My Racing Snail, Thinking It Would Make Him Run Faster.
- I took the shell off my racing snail, thinking it would make him run faster.
- Animals, Chickens, Eggs, Imagery, SignsBoneless Chicken
- Boneless Chicken
- Animals, Imagery, SealsThe Seal Of Approval
- The Seal of Approval…
- Cars, Imagery, MosquitosA Mosquito With A Helmet
- Mosquitos flying towards a car.
- Alphabet, Doctors, ImageryThe Medical Alphabet
- The Medical Alphabet
- Facebook, ImageryBe The First Of Your Friends To Like This Post.
- A post with a poster on it, “Be the first of your friends to like this post”.
- Animals, Dogs, ImageryFree Puppy
- Free puppy…
- Imagery, MenI'd Rather Break My Arms Than Take Two Trips
- I'd rather break my arms than take two trips.
- Political, ReligiousThe 10 Commandments
- The real reason that we can’t have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse or parliament…
- Animals, Horses, Imagery, Knights, Monty Python, Riding, TvCouldn’t Find My Coconut Shells.
- Was gonna ride to work today. Couldn’t find my coconut shells.
- Australia, Bank Notes, Banks, Imagery, Money, PoliticalAustralian Bank Notes
- Australian Bank Notes.
- Imagery, RacistYou Must Be A Racist
- Oh, you were expecting a white guy?
- Coronavirus, Hands, Hand Washing, Imagery, WashingRemember To Wash Your Hands!
- My drawing is not great but please remember to wash your hands. Stay safe guys!
- Australia, Imagery, Kevin Rudd, PoliticalThe Many Hands Of Kevin Rudd
- The many hand gestures of Kevin Rudd.
- Geeky, ImageryVoice
- Scrooge and Donald on IRC.
- AudioPsychiatric Answering Machine
- A Psychiatric Office Answering Machine.
- Imagery, Kitchens, Sexist, WomenFor Too Long The Voice Of Women Has Been Silenced
- For too long the voice of women has been silenced. It’s time they had microphones in kitchens.
- Crime, Police, ShootingThe Floor Is Still Wet
- I have an interesting case here. An old lady shot her husband for stepping on the floor she just mopped…
- Accidents, Cars, ImagerySorry: A Bus Accident
- Sorry: A Bus Accident
- Cars, Imagery, Roads, SignsTired? Powernap Now.
- Tired? Powernap now.
- PoliticalBush And The Queen
- While visiting England, George Bush is invited to tea with the Queen…
- Animals, Dogs, Drugs, Imagery, MethMeth Lab Dog
- Yellow Lab, Black Lab, Chocolate Lab, Meth Lab!
- Accidents, Cars, Imagery, Seatbelts, SexistNew Seatbelt Design: 45% Less Car Accidents!
- A man driving a car while a woman sits beside him, with her seatbelt across her mouth, preventing her from commenting.
- Animals, Cats, ImageryAbercrombie & Cat
- Abercrombie & Cat
- Driving, Sexist, WomenDamn Women Drivers
- This morning on the freeway, I looked over to my left and there was a woman in a brand new Cadillac doing 110…
- Geeky, Imagery, InternetSlashdot For Dummies
- Slashdot for Dummies – A Reference for the Rest of Us!
- Animated, Flash, Illusion, ImageryIllusions
- Warning: May induce epilepsy or cardiac arrest…
- Fish, ImageryThe Swordfish
- The swordfish has few predators to worry about in the wild, except for the seldom seen penfish which is said to be even mightier.
- Imagery, JokeHow Many Alzheimer’s Patients Does It Take?
- To get to the other side!
- Bill Gates, Imagery, Mario, North Korea, Star Wars, WinrarThe Good Guys Of The World
- These are the Good Guys of the World.
- Mechanics, UnderwearAlways Wear Underwear
- Always wear underwear in public, especially when working under your vehicle…
- Self-checkout, Shopping, Technology, TerminatorUnexpected Item In Bagging Area.
- It’s not unexpected, you literally just told me what it is…
- Computer Games, Geeky, ImageryReality
- Worst game ever.
- Birth Control, Imagery, RisquéEffective Birth Control
- The most effective birth control method known to man.
- Imagery, NinjasNinja Exit
- Ninja Exit Only
- ImageryProblem Solving Flowchart
- A simple, and humorous, flowchart that successfully troubleshoots almost any problem you can think of.
- Dates, ImageryMay The 4th Be With You
- If today is “May the 4th be with you” does that mean tomorrow is “revenge of the 5th?”
- Computers, GeekyMessage From Your IT Deptartment
- Message from your IT Deptartment…
- Animals, Babies, Biblical, Dogs, Imagery, ReligiousTake His Wife And Flee
- It seems Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but she looked back and turned into a pillar of salt! What happened to the flea?
- Asian, Imagery, Iphone, Racist, RiceIf Your Phone Gets Wet, Try Placing It In A Bag Of Rice
- If your phone gets wet, try placing it in a bag of rice. At night, the rice will attract Asians who will fix your electronics for you.
- Food, Imagery, Microwaves, ScienceNo Science In This Microwave
- Food only. Absolutely no science in this microwave.
- Imagery, Iphone, Nokia, PhonesNokia Versus The IPhone
- The strongest phones ever!
- Mayans, PredictionsMayans Predicting The Future
- Calm down… If the Mayans were good at predicting the future, there would still be Mayans.
- Risqué, WorkThe Boss’s Quandary
- The Boss’s Quandary…
- Buses, Bus Stops, Harry Potter, Hogwarts, ImageryBus To Hogwarts
- To get the bus to Hogwarts, please run directly at this sign.
- America, Imagery, RacistAmerican Measures
- American Measures: An Arbitrary Retarded Rollercoaster
- Redneck, TechnologyTechnology For Country Folk
- Technology for Country Folk.
- Internet, RisquéCybersex How-Not-To
- Cybersex how it should not be…
- Bikes, Imagery, PostsHave You Seen This Post?
- Have you seen this post? He didn’t.
- JokeExercise - Some Facts
- Exercise… some facts.
- Cling-wrap, Imagery, WorkCling-wrap Fun
- Cling-wrap fun.
- Animals, Beaches, Imagery, Signs, Stingrays, WarningsShuffle Your Feet For Stingrays
- Shuffle your feet for Stingrays: One of the many dangers in Australian waters.
- Animals, Cows, ImageryA Cow Getting A Back Scratch
- A cow getting a back scratch.
- Crocs, Friday The 13th, Imagery, Jason Voorhees, Movies, ShoesJason Voorhees Gets Crocs
- Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) gets Crocs.
- Imagery, Potatoes, Vegan, VegetablesVegan Potatoes
- Vegans are evil…
- Computer Games, ImageryVideo Games Ruined My Life
- Video games ruined my life. Good thing I have two more.
- Advertising, Imagery, Motorola, Tv, VintageTelevision Benefits Your Children
- How television benefits your children.
- Capitalism, Imagery, PoliticalSuffering From Capitalism
- Feeling sad and depressed? Are you anxious? Worried about the future? Feeling isolated and alone? You might be suffering from Capitalism.
- Geeky, InternetDiary Of An AOL Luser
- Diary of an AOL Luser.
- Sexist, WomenWhen A Woman Says “what?”
- When a woman says “what?”, it’s not because she didn’t hear you. She’s giving you a chance to change what you said.
- Computers, GeekyRandom Number
- A simple function to return a random number.
- Advertising, Apple, Imagery, Iphone, Phones, Samsung, Samsung Galaxy, TechnologyApple IPhone 20 & Samsung Galaxy S23 – Sword & Shield
- A mock-up of the iPhone 20 and Samsung Galaxy S23, after the launch of the “taller” iPhone5 & the larger Galaxy S3.
- Animals, JokePygmy Dinosaur Hunter
- The Pygmy Dinosaur Hunter…
- ☺Talking Clock
- Why, that’s my Talking Clock…
- Advertising, Boats, Imagery, Oceans, Oxi-clean, ShipsThe Power Of Oxi-Clean
- The Power of Oxi-Clean.
- Cartoons, Food, ImageryChocolate Pudding
- It’s four o’clock in the morning. Why on earth are you making chocolate pudding?
- Image, Qut, UniversityQUT: University For The Real World
- Will we find intelligent life?
- Geeky, ImageryBlackboard
- School kid writing Code on blackboard as punishment.
- Geeky, Imagery, Scientific, UniversityHow People In Science See Each Other
- How People in Science See Each Other.
- ImageryBird Flu
- I’m not worried about this bird flu…
- Facebook, Imagery, InternetFuture Man
- So you’re saying people will “tweet” what they’re eating for breakfast?
- Imagery, SexistCall The Rescue Squad!
- I’m sorry dear. I can’t hear you. I’m in the kitchen, making you a sandwich.
- Imagery**** I Forgot To Turn Off The Oven
- **** I forgot to turn off the oven.
- Epilepsy, Imagery, PostersSeize The Day
- Seize The Day: Sign up for the Epilepsy Awareness Walk.
- Africa, Apple, Imagery, Ipad, StarvingThinner Than Ever
- Thinner than ever.
- Imagery, RisquéFlower Porn
- Even flowers do it…
- Browsers, Chrome, Firefox, Geeky, Imagery, Internet, Internet Explorer, Opera, SafariIE Retarded
- I hope he doesn’t say something retarded…
- RisquéTest Your Subconscious
- This revolutionary test will expose the secret desires from your subconscious…
- Animals, Halloween, Imagery, SquirrelsHalloween Squirrel
- A squirrel got its head stuck in a Halloween decoration and terrified a neighbourhood…
- Computers, Geeky, ImagerySpeed Reader
- Wow you read that fast! You must be a speed reader!
- Apple, Computers, Flash, Geeky, Imagery, MacMacintosh
- Mac Hater…
- Animals, Dogs, Drugs, High, ImageryDog, How High Are You?
- Dog, how high are you? Yes.
- Animals, Dogs, Education, Elephants, Exams, Fish, Imagery, Monkeys, Penguins, School, SealsOur Education System
- [To an assorted group of animals] Our Education System: For a fair selection everybody has to take the same exam: Please climb that tree.
- Africa, Animals, ImageryRhino Painting
- A rhinoceros painting…
- ☺Comments & Other Similar Social Data
- Comments, Facebook Open Graph, & Other Similar Social Data.
- English, Grammar, Risqué, School, University, WritingShort Story
- A college class was told they had to write a short story in as few words as possible.…
- Africa, Animals, Imagery, MoviesThe Lion King: Proof At Last
- Pumbaa & Timon…
- Food, ImageryLittle Green Balls Of Death
- Little Green Balls of Death
- Cars, ImagerySomething Wrong Officer?
- Something wrong officer?
- Computers, GeekyMicrosoft Lightbulb Jokes
- Microsoft Lightbulb Jokes.
- Coathangers, Imagery, WarningsDo Not Swallow Coathangers!
- Caution: Do Not Swallow Coathangers!
- Australia, Democracy, Political, RacistThe Ant And The Grasshopper
- The Original Story of the Ant and the Grasshopper.
- Imagery, Reincarnation, WoodReincarnation Gone Horribly Wrong
- Reincarnation gone horribly wrong
- Flying, Imagery, SportFlying – Because Golf Only Takes One Ball
- Flying – because softball, baseball, football, basketball, soccer, bowling and golf only take one ball.
- Bread, Food, Imagery, TonguesPlease Use Tongue.
- Do not touch bread with hands. Please use tongue.
- Advertising, Boobs, Imagery, Sexist, VintageSabrina Projects
- Sabrina demonstrates the world’s finest projection equipment…
- Animals, Art, Bananas, Carving, Food, Horses, ImageryBanana Carving
- Banana Carving.
- Animals, Ducklings, Ducks, ImageryBeware Of Cute Duckling Scam
- Beware of Cute Duckling Scam…
- Alcohol, Drunk, ImagerySlur In Cursive
- When I drink, I don’t slur my words… I speak in cursive.
- Animals, Imagery, Internet, RabbitsStop Surfing The Internet And Just Go To Bed
- Holy crap! Look how late it is! Why do I always do this? Why is it so hard to stop surfing the internet and just go to bed?
- Imagery, Mexico, RacistMexico’s National Sport
- What is Mexico’s national sport? Cross country.
- Corporate, Geeky, ImageryPatent Infringement
- Eating Fruit…
- Babies, Cars, Imagery, StickersBaby On Board
- Baby on Board
- Clouds, Computers, Imagery, TechnologyWhat Are Clouds Made Of?
- Daddy, what are clouds made of?
- Cars, Imagery, StickersF It
- F-it
- Hands, Imagery, Risqué, Valentine’s DayValentine Hand
- Of course I’ll be your valentine. Let’s stay home and watch some porn.
- Adoption, Babies, ImageryAdopted Baby
- Dude, I’m joking, you are not adopted!
- Animals, Cars, Donkeys, ImageryA BMW Donkey
- A BMW donkey. Not much more to be said really.
- RisquéMickey Mouse
- One day, Mickey Mouse decided that he wanted a divorce…
- ReligiousThe Atheist & The Bear
- The Atheist and the Religious Bear
- WorkExecutive Test
- The following short quiz consists of four questions and will tell you whether you are qualified to be a “professional”…
- Sexist, WomenWords Women Use
- Words women use, and what they really mean.
- Drink, Food, ImageryThings To Eat And Drink In Public
- Things to eat and drink in public.
- Agony Aunt, Cheating, Dear Abby, Imagery, Motorbikes, Relationships, SexistDear Abby, I’ve Never Written To You Before…
- Dear Abby, I’ve never written to you before, but I really need your advice on what could be a crucial decision…
- Imagery, Topgear, TvIs There Anything Worse Than A Lego For Stepping On In The Middle Of The Night?
- Is there anything worse than a Lego for stepping on in the middle of the night? A landmine.
- Clowns, Imagery, Risqué, Sex, WomenShe Made That Clown Extremely Happy
- She made that clown extremely happy.
- Apple, Imagery, Iphone, PhonesUpgrade Kit For IPhone 4 Owners
- Upgrade kit for iPhone 4 owners. Only 99¢.
- Drugs, ImageryToo High
- Quick! Grab my hand! I… I can’t! You’re too high! What?
- Money, SexistFemale Financial Planning
- Women are so much better at financial planning than men.
- ImageryMarketing
- Marketing…
- Animals, Birds, Crows, Imagery, TrucksCrows Killed By Trucks
- Why are so many crows killed by trucks?
- Awards, Imagery, Jobs, Roads, WorkThe Winner Of The “Not My Job” Award
- The Winner of the “Not My Job” Award goes to…
- Cars, ImageryPolished My Car Too Much
- Polished my car too much, now it’s invisible…
- ImageryCaution: Door May Open
- Caution: Door May Open.
- ImageryTrapped Miners
- The first photo of the trapped miners…
- Jokes, Pool, Puns, Sport, TreesWhat’s Green, Fuzzy, And If It Fell Out Of A Tree It Would Kill You?
- What’s green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you?
- Imagery, MoviesTitanic Ice Bucket Challenge
- Titanic ALS Ice Bucket Challenge: “I accept your ice water challenge”.
- Advertising, Imagery, Sexist, Shoes, VintageWhere She Belongs
- Keep her where she belongs…
- Geeky, Imagery, Sexist, WomenHazardous Materials Data Sheet – Woman
- Hazardous Materials Data Sheet – Woman.
- ☺Helpful Hints
- Helpful Hints
- Advertising, Apple, Computers, Geeky, Imagery, MacMac Weed
- A take-off of the Apple Macintosh switch ads.
- RisquéSanta’s Stressful Christmas
- Santa’s Stressful Christmas
- ImageryMichael Jackson's Dog
- A rather mean impression of what Michael Jackson’s dog might look like, if it had similar surgery.
- Advertising, April Fools, Ikea, Imagery, Product Recalls, ToolsIKEA Product Recall
- IKEA product recall advert on April Fools Day
- English, Grammar, Imagery, School, TeachersGrammar Vandal
- When English teachers snap: Sorry Ma’am, but bad grammar is no excuse for vandalism.
- English, GrammarThat’s What She Said
- That’s what she said.
- Boobs, Imagery, Risqué, SexistAre Those Yours?
- …they’re turning out so big and cute!
- Flies, Ipad, NewspapersModern Newspapers
- I was visiting my daughter last night when I asked if I could borrow a newspaper…
- Animals, Imagery, RaccoonsGet Well Soon
- A raccoon lies dead on the road, holding a “get well soon” balloon.
- Imagery, Police, ProtestsPolice & Protesters Help Fat Man Remove Pants
- Police & Protesters help fat man remove pants…
- Imagery, ReligiousBelieve In Reincarnation
- Yeah, well, I didn’t believe in reincarnation when I was your age, either.
- Imagery, WorkMeetings
- The practical alternative to work.
- Animals, Dogs, Driving, Imagery, SexistDog Decides Better Driver
- My wife believes she is a better driver. I let our dog decide.
- ImageryBatman Downsized
- Batman forced to downsize with increase in petrol prices…
- Android, Galaxy Note, Imagery, Phones, Samsung, TechnologyBattery Fully Charged. Unplug Charger.
- In what is perhaps one of the more stupid “features” on my Samsung Galaxy Note, when it reaches full charge, it lights up its screen and pops up and audible alert saying “Battery fully charged. Unplug charger.” As I charge my phone at night, it is effectively an extremely annoying unwanted wake-up call.
- Blonde, SexistA Young Brunette Goes To The Doctor...
- A young brunette goes to the doctor…
- Children, Imagery, Sexist, ToysTo Avoid Perpetuating Gender Stereotypes
- To avoid perpetuating gender stereotypes, I gave my daughter a mix of dolls and toy cars to play with. This is what happened…
- Imagery, Risqué, SexSex Tape
- I made a sex tape. Shhh!
- History, ImageryThe Most Difficult Thing To Explain To Someone From The 1950s
- If someone from the 1950s suddenly appeared today, what would be the most difficult thing to explain to them about life today?
- Cars, Imagery, TrucksDriver Is Fully Naked
- Driver carries less than $50 cash and is fully naked.
- Imagery, SignsDon’t Grow Up
- Don’t grow up. It’s a trap.
- Animals, Bunnies, Chocolate, Easter, Food, Imagery, RabbitsEaster Bunnies
- Chocolate Easter Bunnies: My butt hurts! What?
- Imagery, Unicorns, Unicycles, UnitardsUnicorn, Unitard, Unicycle
- Unicorn in a unitard on a unicycle.
- Animals, Australia, Birds, Dingoes, Dolphins, Fish, Galahs, Imagery, Kangaroos, Koalas, Kookaburras, Parrots, Penguins, Snakes, Toads, TurtlesAccurate Animal Names: Australian Edition
- Accurate Animal Names: Australian Edition
- Animals, Imagery, Seals, SharksDo Not Consume If Seal Is Broken!
- Do not consume if seal is broken!
- Imagery, Music, Rock, RocksJust Listening To Some Rock
- Just listening to some rock
- Illusion, ImageryAfterburn - Whom Do You See?
- Relax and concentrate on the four small dots in the middle of the picture…
- Brisbane, Imagery, Logan, Racist, WoodridgeSimba & Woodridge
- But what about that shadowy place?
- Animals, Antelopes, ImageryDid You Know There Is A Species Of Antelope Capable Of Jumping Higher Than The Average House?
- Did you know there is a species of antelope capable of jumping higher than the average house? This is due to its powerful hind legs and the fact that the average house cannot jump.
- Great Expectations, ImageryGreat Expectations
- Who hurt you? My own expectations.
- Animals, Bread, Dogs, Food, ImageryBread Dog
- The Amazing Bread Dog.
- Animals, Cats, Godzilla, Imagery, KittensGodzilla Kitten
- Terrifyingly cute…
- Accidents, Cars, Imagery, TargetMissed Target
- Missed Target: So close…
- Beer, Computers, GeekyIf Beer Was Like Operating Systems...
- If Beer was like Operating Systems…
- Animals, Dogs, ImageryFunny Dog
- The longer you look, the funnier it gets!
- PhrasesWhen Someone Yells “STOP”…
- When someone yells “STOP”, I never know if it’s in the name of love, it’s Hammertime, or I should collaborate and listen…
- April Fools, Imagery, Pizza, Salad, WorkThis Is How Workplace Violence Starts
- This is how workplace violence starts…
- Advertising, Imagery, Men, Sexist, SignsThis Year Thousands Of Men Will Die From Stubbornness…
- This year thousands of men will die from stubbornness. No we won’t.
- Computers, Geeky, Imagery, Internet Explorer, Mac, WindowsCan Your Mac Do This?
- Can your Mac do this? I don’t think so…
- Imagery, RelationshipsA Woman Hid Under The Bed
- To see her husband’s reaction, a woman wrote on a paper: “I left, I’m not coming back.” Hidden under the bed, the woman waited for her husband to arrive. He walked into the room, saw the paper, wrote something on the paper, and put himself to sing, all satisfied. 5 minutes later, he took his cell phone and called someone: “I’m going now. The other nut’s gone. I’m on my way, remember I love you so much” He took the car and left. Mad in anger, the woman comes out under the bed and reads what he wrote… “I can see your feet. I went for bread. Stop being retarded and make dinner…”
- AlcoholCalm Living
- I am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me today, and we all could probably use more calm in our lives.
- Germany, LoveTell Someone You Love Them Today
- Tell someone you love them today, because life is short. But shout it at them in German, because life is also terrifying and confusing.
- Bsod, Clippit, Computers, Geeky, Imagery, Microsoft, WindowsWindows
- Windows. Still the most used operating system, and undoubtedly the most abused.
- Imagery, Jobs, WorkHonesty: Your Greatest Weakness
- Interviewer: What would you consider to be your greatest weakness?
- Comics, ImageryHorton Hears The Who
- Horton Hears the Who
- Guns, ImageryCrayon Gun
- A fantastic gun made from many every-day items.
- Browsers, Firefox, Geeky, Imagery, Internet, WindowsFirefox Has Encountered…
- …an unexpected problem with Windows.
- Centrelink, Imagery, WineDrinking A Nice Wine
- Drinking a nice wine while listening to classical music…
- Children, Imagery, ParentingAn Angry Child
- If she doesn’t put me down in about two seconds, I will be forced to use my fist!
- Cars, Drugs, Imagery, PoliceHow High Are You?
- How High Are You? No Officer, it’s “Hi, how are you”.
- Animals, Flamingos, ImageryGarden Flamingo
- Garden Flamingo…
- Alarms, Animals, Clocks, Imagery, SpidersAlarm Clock That Releases Spiders
- Million dollar idea… alarm clock that releases spiders! Now you’re up!
- Advertising, Imagery, Skype, VintageSkype
- Vintage Skype advert.
- Animals, Animated, Dogs, Imagery, TonguesDog Tongue
- A dog with a very long tongue.
- Animals, Boobs, Bras, Cats, ImageryBooby Trap
- Nooo! It’s a booby trap!
- Boobs, Elevators, Imagery, RisquéThis Morning, I Was Beaten Up By A Busy Woman In An Elevator
- This morning, I was beaten up by a busy woman in an elevator. I was staring at her boobs when she said, “would you please press one?”. So I did. I don’t remember much after that.
- Africa, Bus, ImageryDo You Ever Get So Angry…
- Do you ever get so angry… you throw a VCR at a burning bus?
- Animals, Conspiracies, Dogs, Imagery, SheepThat Conspiracy Stuff
- I’m telling you – the man and the dog are definitely working together…
- Illusion, ImageryFour Perfectly Round Circles
- Four Perfectly Round Circles.
- Drugs, Imagery, Marijuana, SexistI Tried Pot Once. Now I’m Gay!
- I tried pot once. Now I’m gay!
- ImageryCute Party Trick
- Man with finger up nose and out of eye.
- Advertising, Cocaine, Drugs, Imagery, Toothache, VintageCocaine Toothache Drops
- Cocaine Toothache Drops: Instantaneous Cure! 15¢.
- Drawings, Imagery, SignsDraw Bridge
- A man drawing a bridge at a “draw bridge” sign.
- Animated, Imagery, MedicalRoot Canal
- Amusing animated image of root canal treatment
- Cars, Computers, GeekyMicrosoft Car
- Microsoft and General Motors on the Automobile.
- Beer, Imagery, Logan, Prams, Racist, Victoria BitterLogan Priorities
- Logan Priorities.
- America, Imagery, Political, SpyingMy Computer Hard Drive Crashed. NSA Won’t Send Me Their Backup Copy.
- My computer hard drive crashed. NSA won’t send me their backup copy.
- ☺Foot Smart
- See if you can outsmart your foot…
- Imagery, RisquéPremature Ejaculators Anonymous
- Man stating he ‘came too soon’ in front of sign stating ‘premature ejaculators anonymous’.
- Mayans, Movies, Predictions, The Hobbit, TolkienMayans Predicting The Hobbit Movie
- Keep calm. The Mayans were simply counting down to The Hobbit movie.
- Animals, Birds, Imagery, Owls, RegretsRegrets
- I stay up late every night, and realise it’s a bad idea every morning.
- Imagery, Newspapers, TechnologyAll This Technology Is Making Us Antisocial
- All this technology is making us antisocial: A tram full of people ignoring each other and reading the newspaper.
- Books, Imagery, PhobiasEverything You Wanted To Know About Phobias
- Everything you wanted to know about Phobias (but were afraid to ask)
- Imagery, Nietzsche, ReligiousNietzsche Is Dead
- God is dead” ~Nietzsche / “Nietzsche is dead” ~God.
- America, Guns, Imagery, Police, RacistAnd I Was All Like, Pew Pew Pew!
- And I was all like, pew pew pew! Pew pew pew! ‘Merica!
- Beer, ImagerySix Die In Horror Smash
- Six Die in Horror Smash.
- Animals, Dogs, Imagery, Phones, SmsTexts From My Dog
- My dog sends me texts…
- Bathrooms, Imagery, SignsYou Look Fine
- Instead of a mirror, a sign “you look fine”.
- DrugsGranny LSD
- Boy asks his Granny, “Have you seen my pills labelled ‘LSD’?”
- Cpr, First Aid, Imagery, SchoolCPR Diagram
- You’re next!
- Imagery, RisquéHebrew Cave Paintings
- Written across the wall of the cave were the following symbols…
- Accidents, Imagery, Logan, Racist, WindowsLogan Repair
- Another quality repair job by Logan City Council.
- Diving, Imagery, Sharks, Sign LanguageA Signal They Forgot To Teach You In Your Open Water Class.
- Big shark behind you: A signal they forgot to teach you in your open water class.
- Imagery, ScissorsI Run With Scissors
- I run with scissors: It makes me feel dangerous.
- Imagery, SchoolUnprepared For An Exam
- Ever gone into an exam having not studied at all?
- Hats, Imagery, SportYou Can’t Beat Stupid…
- I wish they would invent something to keep the sun out of my eyes…
- Computers, GeekyOperating System Airlines
- Operating System Airlines.
- Fans, ImageryThank You To All My Fans
- Thank you to all my fans
- Imagery, Phones, Risqué, SexPhone Sex
- Phone Sex. You’re doing it wrong.
- Bras, Imagery, New Zealand, Racist, Risqué, SportThe All Blacks Bra
- Introducing the New Zealand All Blacks Bra. All the support, but no cup.
- Imagery, SexistDifference Between Men And Women
- The difference between men and women…
- Alice In Wonderland, Imagery, Movies, SexistUltimate Chick Flick
- Ultimate chick flick: Two women fighting over a pair of shoes
- Imagery, Keith Urban, MusiciansKeith Urban Accepted As Genuine Humanoid
- Clint Felmingham: Did you know? Keith Urban is accepted by many Americans as a genuine humanoid/musician. Urban, a polymer composite (90% polyethene, 8% alcohol, 2% minor celebrity), was manufactured in Caboolture, Australia in 1987..
- Olympics, Racist, SportAthens Olympic Soccer Stadium
- The Athens Olympic Stadium…
- Imagery, Paper, SignsIs It Me You’re Looking For?
- Hello? Is it me you’re looking for?
- Facebook, Imagery, MoneyHow To Make Money From Facebook
- How to make money from facebook: 1) just go to “Account Settings”; 2) Press “Deactivate your account”; 3) Go to work.
- Roadwork, Shovels, WorkersWe Forgot Our Shovels
- A road crew foreman calls into the shop. Foreman: “We have a problem.”
- Animals, Dogs, ImageryHow The Hell Is The Ball Still In Your Hand?
- How the hell is the ball still in your hand?
- Batman, Imagery, WikileaksWikileaks
- Bruce Wayne!
- ReligiousCommon Belief
- The belief that there was nothing…
- Girls, Imagery, WorkForgot I Was Sharing My Screen With Her
- I was on an online conference call with a cute sounding girl, and googled her name out of curiosity. Forgot I was sharing my screen with her.
- Geeky, ItHow To Please Your IT Department
- How to please your IT department.
- Fonts, Imagery, TypographyBe Bold
- Be bold or italic. Never regular.
- Apple, Imagery, Iphone, Iphone 6, PhonesIPhone 6 Repair Kit
- iPhone 6 repair kit.
- Australia, Coronavirus, Imagery, Political, Politicians, Scott MorrisonA Visual Representation Of Scott Morrison’s Address To The Nation
- A visual representation of Scott Morrison’s address to the nation tonight
- English, GrammarEnglish
- Let’s face it - English is a crazy language.
- Alligators, Animals, Crocodiles, ImageryHow To Tell Alligators And Crocodiles Apart
- It’s not that difficult to tell alligators and crocodiles apart…
- Football, Relationships, Sexist, SportThe Loving Husband
- A man had two of the best tickets for the opening State of Origin match. As he sits down, another man comes along and asks if anyone is sitting in the seat next to him…
- Cartoons, Fire, Imagery, StairsIn Case Of Fire, Take Stairs
- In case of fire, take stairs.
- PoliticalLabel Instructions
- French Label Instructions
- Animals, Drugs, ImageryFlying Ants
- How ants began to fly…
- Aboriginal, Australia, Imagery, Racist, The RockStolen Generator
- So I heard about the stolen generation…
- Animals, Dachshunds, Dogs, Imagery, RacingDachshund Racing
- Googled “dachshund racing”. Was not disappointed.
- ☺Dear Thigh Fat
- Help the needy?
- Bottles, Imagery, Messages, UsbModern Day Message In A Bottle
- A USB stick in a bottle lying on the beach.
- Computer Games, Geeky, Imagery90’s Gamer
- Everytime I hear people complain about online gaming, I wish they could experience my pain of online gaming in the 90’s…
- ImagerySense
- …this picture makes none.
- America, Animals, Australia, Britain, Cows, India, Irish, PoliticalYou Have Two Cows
- The eponymous cows is used to demonstrate the advantages and flaws of certain economic systems.
- Apple, Imagery, Ios, PatentsOlden Day Slide To Unlock
- Slide to unlock: Apple patent #1964022.
- All Your Base, Geeky, Imagery, InternetAll Your Base...
- All your base are belong to us.
- Computers, Geeky, ImageryKeyboards
- Amusing Keyboards
- Alcohol, Beer, Fitness, ImageryI Wonder What I Would Look Like With A Six Pack?
- I wonder what I would look like with a six pack? Ahh, much better!
- Boobs, Cars, Imagery, Risqué, SexistShe Might Scratch The Paint
- I know what you’re thinking… she might scratch the paint.
- Medical, RisquéKeep Off The Grass
- A Nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room, when a young woman with purple hair styled into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting a variety of tattoos, and wearing strange clothes, entered…
- Animals, Cats, Imagery, WorkI Used To Smile… Until I Worked Retail.
- I used to smile… until I worked retail.
- Chocolate, Geeky, Homes, Honey, Imagery, Milk, PhonesQuite Literally…
- I phone, you tube. Hi honey, I’m home. Chocolate milk shake.
- Air Force, Fighter Jets, Imagery, Jets, NavyWrong Button
- Fighter jet hits the wrong button.
- Computers, Geeky, It, Technology101 Things You Do Not Want...
- 101 Things You Do Not Want Your System Administrator to say.
- Computer Games, Education, Games, Imagery, Internet, Minecraft, School, TestsMinecraft: Create A Simple Door
- Describe a process that could be used to create a simple door.
- Bras, Imagery, UnderwearSupport Bras
- Supportive support bras…
- Balloons, Birthdays, ImageryBalloons Are So Weird…
- Balloons are so weird… “Happy Birthday, here’s a plastic sack of my breath”
- Beer, Imagery, SexistYou Never Listen To Me…
- You never listen to me! You only hear what you want to hear!
- Imagery, Michael Jackson, Performers, SingersMichael Jackson Is Dead
- You Can Come Out Now…
- Imagery, WorkNothing To Do
- In case of nothing to do, break glass and then sweep up broken glass.
- Emoji, Imagery, Phones, SmsEmoji
- Alien blood transfusions are illegal for ghosts, but beach chickens win!
- Animals, Cats, Ducks, Imagery, SeagullsCat Duck
- The Amazing Cat Duck! Or perhaps Cat Seagull?
- Animals, Imagery, KangaroosI Said Be Quiet! Don’t Make Me Come In There!
- I said be quiet! Don’t make me come in there!
- Clothes, Hats, Imagery, TiesYou Hang Around, I’ll Go On Ahead
- You hang around, I’ll go on ahead.
- Imagery, Toilets, VandalismToilet Vandalism
- We buy things we don’t need with money we don’t have to impress people we don’t like…
- Apple, Imagery, Ios, Ios7, Iphone, Mobiles, PhonesThe New IPhone 5C With IOS 7
- The new iPhone 5C with IOS 7.
- ImageryPositive For Coke
- You’re fired Jack, the lab results just came back and you tested positive for Coke.
- English, Grammar, ImageryComforting A Grammar Nazi
- When comforting a grammar nazi, I always say softly, “there, their, they’re”
- Animals, Carrots, Food, Imagery, Rabbits, VegetablesSuccess Is Not Always What You See
- Success is not always what you see…
- Accidents, Cars, ImageryPass With Care
- Pass with care…
- Africa, Animals, Imagery, Lions, SafarisShould I Tell Them I’m Here?
- Should I tell them I’m here?
- Bricks, Footpaths, Imagery, OcdOCD Bricks
- The worst thing that can happen to an OCD person…
- Risqué, SexistMating Bulls
- A man took his wife to the Rodeo and one of the exhibits is that of breeding bulls…
- Cars, ImageryThe Park Anywhere Button
- Self-explanatory really.
- Imagery, RisquéDangers Of Masturbation
- The Dangers of Masturbation.
- Imagery, Marriage, Onions, People, ProposingProposing With An Onion
- Proposing with an onion: Guaranteed to cry.
- Animals, Business, Dogs, ImageryAssistant Branch Manager
- The Branch Manager and the Assistant Branch Manager.
- Boobs, SexistTen Things Men Know About Women
- Ten things men know about women…
- Animals, Imagery, ZebrasZebra Crossing
- Zebra Crossing…
- ☺How To Make Sure You’re A Normal Person
- A quick and easy test to determine if you are a normal person…
- Cars, Geeky, TechnologyCars And Computers
- General Motors doesn’t have a help line for people who don’t know how to drive because people don’t buy cars like they buy computers, but imagine if they did…
- Brooms, Imagery, Parking, Sexist, Witches, WomenWomen Can’t Park
- Who said that women can’t park?
- Cars, PoliceSpeed Camera
- Speed camera revenge…
- Australia, New Zealand, RacistAn Aussie Taxidermist In New Zealand…
- An Aussie Taxidermist in New Zealand…
- Australia, Bbq, Cooking, Food, SexistBarbecue Etiquette
- Aussie Barbecue Season.
- Alcohol, Holidays, Imagery, WineHoliday Workout
- Holiday Workout: Three corkscrews.
- Art, Imagery, Michelangelo, Paintings, Reenactment, Sistine ChapelMichelangelo: The Re-enactment
- A re-enactment of Michelangelo’s famous “The Creation of Adam”.
- Beds, Hotels, Imagery, Phones, SheetsAlways Leave Your Hotel Room Like This
- Always leave your hotel room like this
- Children, Parenting, Risqué“Hi Honey. This Is Daddy. Is Mummy Near The Phone?”
- Hi honey. This is Daddy. Is Mummy near the phone?
- Animals, Birds, Imagery, Missing Posters, Paper, Pigeons, PostersHave You Seen This Bird?
- I met this bird by the tree near the library. We chilled for like, 5 minutes, & then without any warning he just flew away. We really hit it off. So if you see him, please let him know I miss him.
- Computers, Evolution, ImagerySomething Went Terribly Wrong
- Something, somewhere went terribly wrong.
- Animals, Imagery, Nuclear Power, SpidersSpider Farm
- This seems like a disaster waiting to happen…
- Imagery, Signs, WarningsThrew Caution To The Wind
- Looks like someone threw caution to the wind.
- Chess, Feminists, Imagery, Sexist, WomenHow To Play Chess
- How to Play Chess: Whites go first. The Queen must protect the King.
- Imagery, SexistBefore And After...
- Before and after marriage…
- Alcohol, Animals, Dogs, Imagery, Skateboards, Smoking, WineBad Dog Is Banned From The Park
- I don’t know who this dog is or why he is banned from this park, but he certainly seems like a lot of fun.
- Books, Imagery, Lance Armstrong, LibrariesLance Armstrong Fiction Books
- All non-fiction Lance Armstrong books including “Lance Armstrong: Images of a Champion”, “The Lance Armstrong Peprformance Program” and “Lance Armstrong: World’s Greatest Champion” will soon be moved to the fiction section.
- Animals, Cats, ImageryCat Eats Watermelon
- Cat eats watermelon
- Bacon, ImageryTen Pieces Of Bacon
- If I had 10 pieces of bacon, and you took 4, what would you have? Yes, that’s right you’d have a black eye and a bruised hand.
- Jokes, Punography, PunsPunography
- I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me…
- Illusion, ImageryThey See Us Rollin’
- They See Us Rollin’… We Aren’t…
- Food, ImageryPeanut Delivery
- Peanut Delivery…
- Advertising, Gay, Imagery, Showers, VintageBradley Group Showers
- Bradley Group Showers.
- Imagery, Musicians, Rolling Stones, ZombiesZombies!
- Zombies! Oh, wait… false alarm, it’s just the Rolling Stones… carry on!
- Dinosaurs, Imagery, MuseumsTrannysaurus
- Trannysaurus: You’re fired.
- Comics, Education, ImageryUnused Diploma.
- I’d like to return this. It’s unused. This is your diploma. Cash is fine.
- Buses, ImageryGo Home Bus, You’re Drunk!
- Go home bus, you’re drunk!
- Computer Games, Imagery, SexistThe Way Girls Play Computer Games
- The way girls play computer games.
- Accidents, Aeroplanes, Imagery, LuggageClosing Airline Luggage Doors
- Closing Airline Luggage Doors.
- Imagery, SignsAlways Give 100%
- Whatever you do always give 100%. Unless you’re donating blood.
- SexistGuts Or Balls?
- We’ve all heard about men having guts or balls. But do you really know the difference between them?
- Animals, Imagery, WhalesPaper, Scissors, Whale!
- Scissors cut paper again! I hate this game…
- Boats, Imagery, IslandsBoat! Land!
- Boat! Land!
- Geeky, Imagery, Movies, Star WarsStar Wars
- A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away…
- Apple, Imagery, Iphone, Iphone 6, Nokia, PhonesIPhone 5 Plus Versus Nokia 3310
- iPhone 6 Plus versus Nokia 3310: Does it bend?
- Animals, ImageryAntique Tables
- Made Daily…
- Comics, Imagery, Movies, WorkPopular Sayings #38
- Dress for the job you want, not the one you have.
- Bikes, Brisbane, Citycycle, Imagery, UnicyclesFrom The Minds Who Brought You CityCycle — UniCycle.
- From the minds who brought you CityCycle — UniCycle. Brisbane’s brightest idea yet.
- Communist, Geeky, Imagery, Microsoft, SoftwareCommunist Traitor
- It looks like you’re a Communist traitor…
- Jokes, MathMath Joke
- Math joke.
- Board Games, Imagery, SexistWomen’s Monopoly
- By a man…
- Advertising, Babies, ImageryGood Things Are Twice As Good In Cellophane
- Good things are twice as good in Cellophane!
- Bikinis, Burqa, Imagery, Muslim, Racist, SexistWhat A Cruel Male-dominated Culture
- It’s a male dominated culture, no matter how you look at it…
- AudioTelstra Customer Service
- An insight into the Telstra Customer Service Experience.
- Business Cards, ImageryYou Have A Nice… Business Card
- A business card: “You have a nice… {day, ass, attitude}.
- Bob Hope, Imagery, Johnny Cash, Kevin Bacon, Steve JobsDon’t Let Kevin Bacon Die
- 20 years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have No Cash, No Hope and No Jobs. Please don’t let Kevin Bacon die.
- Imagery, ToiletsPeeing: Expert Mode
- Peeing: Expert Mode
- Imagery, KnittingWinter Knitting
- What are you going to knit this winter?
- Beaches, Imagery, Irish, SunbathingIrish Girl Sunbathing
- An Irish girl sunbathes…
- Imagery, Queensland, WinterI Absolutely Love Winter In Queensland.
- I absolutely love winter in queensland. Last year it was a Wednesday.
- Eggs, ImageryEscape Egg
- Counting down the days to escape…
- Imagery, Paper, Plants, TreesIrony: Drawing Trees On Paper
- Irony: Drawing trees on paper.
- Alcohol, Food, Imagery, VodkaVodka Diet: Lose 3 Days In 1 Week
- Vodka Diet: Lose 3 Days in 1 Week.
- Babies, Drinking, Imagery, Studying, The RockWhat Are Your Plans For The Weekend?
- What are your plans for the weekend? Studying. [shocked look] Drinking! Drinking!
- Animals, Dogs, Imagery, SnakesLong Dogs
- A man walking two long dogs meets a man walking two normal dogs…
- America, Calendars, Imagery, Mayans, Obama, Political, PredictionsThe Mystery Of The Mayan Calendar Revealed
- At last, the mystery of the Mayan calendar revealed.
- Cars, Imagery, MoviesDiesel
- Hey, wanna know what I put in my car?
- Chinese, Imagery, Newspapers, SubmarinesHiding Submarines
- China may be using sea to hide its submarines
- Geeky, ItDeclaration Of A Software Professional
- Declaration of a Software Professional.
- Education, Imagery, School, TeachersExplain These Bad Grades
- 1969: A child’s parents blame him for his bad grades. Today: A child’s parents blame his teacher for his bad grades.
- Animals, Cats, ImageryCat Bag
- It’s a cat bag. Not too sure what else to say about this…
- Africa, Animals, Cars, Elephants, ImageryYou Know You Are Having A Bad Day When…
- You know you are having a bad day when…
- Computers, ImageryAlready Exists
- skdjaskdhsajdahsdjashds.jpg already exists. Do you want to replace it? You've got to be kidding me.
- Cars, ImageryFail Towing
- Thank You for Using Fail Towing, Inc.
- ☺Fifteen Things To Do At The Supermarket…
- Fifteen things to do at the supermarket while your spouse is taking their sweet time…
- English, GrammarBipolar Awesome
- English can be weird. It can be understood through tough thorough thought, though.
- ☺Perfect Existence
- Perfect Existence: The Proof
- Blonde, Imagery, SexistBlonde Geometry
- Attached is problem 3 on a geometry examination…
- SexistMars Vs. Venus
- Mars versus Venus…
- Gandalf, Harry Potter, Imagery, Lord Of The Rings, Patrick Stewart, Star Trek, Star WarsHow To Offend Four Groups Of Geeks With One Picture
- How to offend four groups of geeks with one picture.
- Canada, Etiquette, ImageryHolding Doors
- Holding Doors: A Question of Distance.
- JokeLaurel And Hardy
- Laurel and Hardy were repairing their roof. All of a sudden, Hardy lost his balance and went tumbling on the ground…
- Animals, Dogs, Imagery, RisquéBitches & Hose
- Having so much fun…
- Bananas, Food, Imagery, SuicideSuicidal Bananas
- A collection of suicidal bananas.
- Imagery, RisquéDon’t Fall For This
- The CIA is trying to steal my…
- Animals, Animated, Giraffes, ImageryHidden Giraffe
- If you stare at this picture long enough you should be able to see a giraffe…
- SexistGirl’s And Boy’s Diaries
- A girl and a boy and their diaries…
- GeekyQ209354 - HOWTO
- How to RTFM…
- Einstein, Imagery, Phones, TechnologyThe Day Einstein Feared
- The day that Einstein feared may have finally arrived.
- SexistMen Are Like...
- Men are like…
- Bananas, Food, George Bush, ImageryThis Banana Tastes Funny
- “This banana tastes funny” – George Bush.
- Dads, Imagery, Jokes, Phones, SmsSometimes I Sit On The Floor And Put My Arms Around My Knees And Lean Forward
- Dad: Sometimes I sit on the floor and put my arms around my knees and lean forward. Daughter: Huh? Dad: Cuz that’s how I roll!
- ImageryThe Ego Boost Urinal
- The Ego Boost Urinal.
- Animals, Cats, Dogs, ImageryCat: The Dog Went Missing
- Cat: The dog went missing? Hahaha! Hahaha! I’m sorry human. Hahaha… no seriously, I’m so sad…
- ImagerySuper Batman
- The Super Batman back pack, exclusive from China!
- ☺The Poodle And The Leopard
- Experience trumps youth.
- Cartoons, ImageryFor A Good Time
- For a good time, call…
- Bikes, ImagerySquare Bike
- Surprisingly good riding down stairs… not so good on the flat.
- Harry Potter, Imagery, Magic, Risqué, WandsReplace The Word “wand” With “dick” In Any Sentence In Harry Potter
- Replace the word “wand” with “dick” in any sentence in Harry Potter…
- Campervans, Camping, Cars, ImageryNot A Happy Camper
- Not a Happy Camper.
- ImageryHoliday House
- The Holiday House
- Dyslexia, Imagery, Sex, Shirts, TshirtsI Have Sex Daily
- I have sex daily! I mean dyslexia! Fcuk.
- Halloween, Imagery, Pumpkins, VegetablesAngry Pumpkin Man
- Angry Pumpkin Man: Come at me bro!
- Animals, Australia, Cockatoos, Flies, Imagery, Kangaroos, Kookaburras, Magpies, Possums, Snakes, Spiders, SunburnTypically Australian Problems
- Some typically Australian problems that other people don’t face.
- Animals, Cats, Imagery, Snow, SnowballsThe Cat & The Snowball
- The Cat & the Snowball.
- Geeky, InternetAmusing Chat
- Humour from the world of Internet Chat
- Racist, RedneckA Redneck Love Poem
- Susie Lee done fell in love…
- Accidents, Food, ImageryMilkshake Meets Door
- A woman runs into a door carrying two milkshakes.
- Animals, Irish, RacistIrish Pets
- Two Irish men walk into a pet shop…
- Babies, ImageryResisting A Rest
- If I refuse to nap… is that resisting a rest?
- Animals, Eggs, Giraffes, ImageryGiraffe Egg
- Giraffe Egg.
- Balloons, Hot Air Balloons, ImageryHot Air Balloons
- Hot Air Balloons - Boring 99% of the time.
- Food, Imagery, RisquéCarrot Love
- When carrots get kinky…
- Animals, Dogs, ImageryFridge Magnets
- Well, tell me, Randy. Has someone eaten all the refrigerator magnets again?
- WorkMergers
- Amusing mergers.
- Australia, Gillard, PoliticalPatriotic Retirement Plan
- Ms Gillard’s Patriotic Retirement Plan.
- Imagery, MotivationalSomeone Out There Cares
- I want you to know that someone out there cares. Not me, but someone does.
- Cars, SexistHow To Change Your Oil
- How to Change your Oil: A guide for men & women…
- Animals, Computer Games, Games, Imagery, PhonesAngry Birds
- Angry Birds attend Anger Management.
- Animals, Joke, PigsThree Little Piggies
- Three Little Pigs went out to dinner one night…
- Charts, Computer Games, Imagery, Pacman, Pie ChartsPacman Pie Chart
- The Pacman pie chart.
- Energy Drinks, Geeky, Imagery, Rubiks CubesMonster Energy Drinks & Rubiks Cubes
- Monster energy drinks & Rubiks Cubes: Dude. You have a problem. Problem solved!
- Redheads, SexistRedheads
- How do you get a redhead…
- Campbell Newman, Imagery, Political, QueenslandCampbell Newman: Public Service: You Can Trust Me
- [Campbell Newman laughing] …and then I said to the public service… you can trust me…
- Animals, Imagery, RabbitsWhat Rabbits Do
- What rabbits do when humans go out…
- Imagery, TvThinking Outside The Square
- A sideways television.
- RisquéTemptation
- Temptation, by a soon to be married man.
- Imagery, Movies, PiratesHorny Pirate’s Worst Nightmare
- What’s a horny pirate’s worst nightmare?
- English, Grammar, ImageryGrammar Matters
- Two Google searches: One for “how can u” and one for “how can an individual”
- Dinosaurs, Imagery, Political, SpyingIf You’re Not Doing Anything Wrong, You Shouldn’t Have Anything To Hide
- The government says “If you’re not doing anything wrong, you shouldn’t have anything to hide.” If that is true, shouldn’t the government declassify everything?
- Food, Imagery, WorkKikkoman When He’s Down
- Your boss called to say you’re fired. So I bought your favourite soy sauce…
- Aeroplanes, Buses, Cars, Electricity, Firefighters, Imagery, VaccinesRe-Think Vaccines
- Next time someone tells you to re-think vaccines, show them this.
- Animals, Computer Games, Computers, Imagery, SpidersBravery
- …in the face of spiders.
- Alcohol, Beer, Imagery, WineIn Wine There Is Truth
- In Wine there is Truth. In Beer there is Strength. In Water there is Bacteria.
- Animals, Cats, ImageryCat In A Cat Box
- A cat in a Cat box.
- Bananas, Carving, Food, Guns, Imagery, WeaponsBanana Gun
- Banana gun…
- Imagery, Phones, SmsChosen One
- I’m the chosen one…
- Computers, Sms, WindowsWindows Frozen
- Wife texts husband on a cold winter’s morning, “Windows frozen.”
- Animals, Birds, Chickens, Imagery, Rock And RollChook Heavy Metal Guitarist
- A heavy metal guitarist chicken
- Buffering, Buffy, Imagery, TvBuffy Buffering
- Buffy buffering…
- Australia, Imagery, Nsw, PolicePoliceman’s Ball
- A young woman was pulled over for speeding. A NSW Police Officer walked to her car window flipping open his ticket book. She said “I bet you are going to try and sell me a ticket to the Policeman’s Ball.” He said, “NSW Police don’t have balls.” There was a moment of silence. Then he closed his book, tipped his hat, and got back in his patrol car and left!
- ImageryMcDonald’s Reaches Africa
- McDonald’s reaches Africa.
- Angels, Imagery, Red Bull, SculpturesRed Bull Gives You Wings
- Red Bull Gives You Wings.
- Australia, Imagery, Julia Gillard, Kevin Rudd, PoliticalWhere Was I Before I Was So Rudely Interrupted?
- [Kevin Rudd] Where was I before I was so rudely interrupted?
- America, Democracy, PoliticalHow To Know When You’ve Met A Democrat
- Just in case you have trouble knowing when you’ve met a Democrat…
- Animals, Imagery, PigsBacon Seed
- Bacon seed.
- Imagery, RocksMy Pet Rock Ran Away
- My Pet Rock Ran Away…
- ☺The Fellowship Of The Ring
- The Fellowship of the Ring.
- Imagery, RacistHow To Be Black
- How to be Black: An Instructional Book.
- Animals, Imagery, OttersOtter Nonsense
- I’ve had it up to here with your otter nonsense…
- Animals, Cats, ImageryJust Wait Until I’m Fully Charged
- Just wait until I’m fully charged…
- Geeky, ImageryReach Out
- Reach Out!
- Australia, Football, Imagery, Muslim, Racist, SportWell, I Guess We’ll Beheading Home Now
- Well, I guess we’ll beheading home now…
- Credit Cards, Genies, Imagery, Sexist, WomenIrresistible To Women
- Make me irresistible to women
- SexistMen Vs. Women
- Men versus women…
- Animals, Cats, Imagery, KittensNo Sitz
- I be here!
- Facebook, ImageryI Think I Might Stay Home Tonight…
- I think I might stay home tonight… Liver and Wallet like this.
- Helpline, Imagery, Phones, YogaYoga Emergency Hotline
- Yoga Emergency Hotline, how may I help you?
- Cooking, Imagery, Smoke DetectorsWhat Smoke Detectors Warn You About
- What smoke detectors warn you about.
- Geeky, MusicWhat If The Beatles Had Been Computer Freaks?
- What if the Beatles had been computer freaks?
- Babies, ImagerySpot The Baby
- Spot the baby. No, the other one.
- Knock Knock, PolicePolice: Knock Knock
- Police: Knock Knock. Me: Who is it? Police: It’s the police.
- Advertising, Imagery, Rice, Risqué, Sexist, VintageVa-Rice-Ity: My Man Likes Something Unexpected…
- My man likes something unexpected now and then. That’s why I serve him rice.
- Fire, Fire Extinguishers, ImageryFire Extinguisher Fire
- Fire Extinguisher Fire: What do you do now?
- Apple, Bill Gates, Computers, Heaven, Imagery, Microsoft, Phones, Religious, Steve Jobs, WindowsSteve Jobs & Bill Gates Discuss Heaven
- Steve Jobs & Bill Gates Discuss Heaven: It doesn’t have any wall or fence…
- Illusion, ImageryIllogical Lego
- Illogical Lego.
- Beaches, Imagery, WomenBitches Be Trippin’
- Bitches be trippin’
- ImageryWill Not Load Fully
- This picture will not load fully!
- Imagery, PunsThe Highest Form Of Flattery
- Plateaus: The highest form of flattery.
- Food, Imagery, SexistBut God, She Won’t Even Make Me A Sandwich…
- But God, She Won’t Even Make Me a Sandwich…
- Dishes, ImageryDishes
- Dishes: They don’t do themselves.
- ImageryBest Way To Freak Out Your Friends
- Best way to freak out your friends: Do not open unless you plan to kill it (written on an upside down container)
- Imagery, Rallies, Sexist, WomenWhat Women Want
- Who are we? Women! What do we want? We don’t know! When do we want it? NOW!
- Advertising, Imagery, Sexist, Vintage, VitaminsThe Harder A Wife Works, The Cuter She Looks
- So the harder a wife works, the cuter she looks!
- Imagery, PhonesJester App
- Sorry–you've been replaced by an app…
- Food, Imagery, PizzaI Just Burned 1500 Calories In About Five Minutes
- I just burned 1500 calories in about five minutes. I forgot the pizza was in the oven.
- Imagery, SocksThe Divorce Rate Among My Socks Is Astonishing.
- The divorce rate among my socks is astonishing.
- Business Cards, Geeky, Imagery, Notepad, WindowsNotepad Business Card
- A business card styled to look like Windows Notepad.
- Christmas, Christmas Lights, ImageryChristmas Lights: Ditto
- Ditto to that…
- Animals, Boats, Fish, Fishing, ImageryGive A Man A Fish And He Has Food For A Day
- Give a man a fish and he has food for a day. Teach a man to fish and he has to buy bamboo rods, graphite reels, monofilament lines, neoprene waders, creels, tackleboxes, lures, flies, spinners, worm rigs, slip sinkers, offset hooks, gore-tex hats, 20 pocket vests, fish finders, depth sounders, radar, boats, trailers, global positioning systems, coolers and six-packs.
- Illusion, ImageryCrazy Sphere
- A crazy sphere
- Animals, Imagery, RacistBlack Bears
- Uh oh Howard. Looks like this area has black bears…
- Animals, Fish, Girls, ImagerySaved A Fish From Drowning
- Here is a heart warming picture of a little girl that saved a fish from drowning.
- Imagery, SexistIron Man Competition
- Ironman Competition - the way it should be…
- Animals, Imagery, JokeThe World’s Funniest Joke
- The World’s Funniest Joke…
- Game Shows, TvAmusing Hollywood Squares Answers
- Amusing Hollywood Squares Answers.
- Babies, Children, Daycare, Imagery, Logan, RacistLogan Daycare
- Logan Daycare: Just for the whole day
- Imagery, Risqué, SexistGrow Some Balls
- Why do people say ‘grow some balls’?
- Bananas, Cars, Food, ImageryGet In The Banana
- No time to explain. Get in the banana!
- ☺Notice
- Notice is hereby given…
- Advertising, Food, Fountain, Imagery, Tomato Sauce, WoolworthsBuy Two & Receive A Free Fountain Face!
- Buy two and receive a Free Fountain Face!
- Imagery, LoveThis Summarises My Love Life
- This summarises my love life. I’m the guy in blue…
- Animals, Dogs, ImageryDog Poo Bin
- If your dog does a poo please put it in a litter bin.
- Alcohol, Books, Imagery, WineBook Club
- My book club only reads wine labels.
- Imagery, Risqué, SignsPlease Use Finger
- Pen is broken - please use finger.
- Homeless, SexistSledgehammer Psychology
- A business man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner…
- Alcohol, Cooking, Imagery, WineCooking With Wine
- I tried cooking supper with wine tonight. Didn’t go so well. After 5 glasses I forgot why I was even in the kitchen.
- Imagery, PoliceA Cop Just Pulled Me Over And Said “Papers”
- A cop just pulled me over and said “Papers”… so I said “Scissors, I win” and drove off…
- Aliens, ImageryFunniest Alien Fan Art I’ve Seen
- Funniest Alien Fan Art I’ve Seen.
- Imagery, Jobs, WorkThings Don’t Really Change
- Interviewer: What would you consider to be your greatest weakness?
- SexistEvening Classes For Men
- Instructive evening classes for men…
- Dogs, ImageryMy Dog Bailey Tried To Steal Stuff Out Of My Daughter’s Purse.
- My dog Bailey tried to steal stuff out of my daughter’s purse. He got stuck and came over to me for help.
- Geeky, JokesIP Jokes
- I’d tell you a UDP joke, but you may not get it.
- Apple, Imagery, Iphone, Iphone 6, PhonesIPhone 6: Bend It Like Beckham
- iPhone 6: Bend it like Beckham.
- Imagery, Movies, Obi-wan Kenobi, Star Wars, Terrorism, World Trade CentreThese Blast Points… Too Accurate For Sand People
- Obi-Wan Kenobi in front of burning World Trade Centre towers: “These blast points… too accurate for sand people”.
- Books, ImageryMystery Books
- You have to find them first…
- Children, Families, Imagery, Parenting, SchoolWhen I Grow Up… I Want To Be Like Mommy!
- I wish to clarify that I am not now, nor have I ever been, an exotic dancer…
- Advertising, Feminine Hygiene, Imagery, Risqué, Sexist, Tampons, VintageThe Girls Are Talking About Tampons
- The Blonde: It’s invisible sanitary protection, thank heavens…
- Facebook, ImageryFacebook Illusion
- Facebook: Providing the illusion you have friends since 2004!
- Australia, PoliticalCostello’s Reward For Being Loyal
- Costello’s reward for being loyal…
- Imagery, Logan, Racist, RisquéIn Logan
- Meanwhile… in Logan…
- ImageryProcrastination Issues
- I’m taking care of my procrastination issues; just you wait and see.
- Geeky, ItNetwork Truths
- The Twelve Networking Truths.
- Imagery, Marriage, Men, WomenMarriage Secrets Of Highly Successful Couples
- Marriage secrets of highly successful couples.
- Cosmetics, ImageryPapercut Locator
- Papercut Locator.
- Agony Aunt, Cheating, Clinton, Dear Abby, Dear Abby, Political, RelationshipsDear Abby, My Husband Is A Liar And A Cheat…
- My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on me from the beginning, and, when I confront him, he denies everything…
- GrammarI. Like. It. How. When. You. Read. This. The. Little. Voice. In. Your. Head. Takes. Pauses.
- I. Like. It. How. When. You. Read. This. The. Little. Voice. In. Your. Head. Takes. Pauses.
- SexistCelibacy
- Many aspects of human sexuality are very puzzling…
- Medical, RisquéBetter Than A Flu Shot
- Better than a Flu Shot
- Animals, Dogs, ImageryI See What You Did There
- I see what you did there… also, over here…
- Cyclones, Imagery, SupermarketsCyclone Magic Trick
- Wanna see a magic trick?
- America, Guns, ImageryHow To Sneak Chocolate Into An American Movie Theatre.
- How to sneak chocolate into an American movie theatre.
- Imagery, Lord Of The Rings, Sauron, Traffic LightsKneel, Says The Demon Light
- Stop says the red light, go says the green. Wait says the yellow light, twinkling in between. Kneel, says the demon light, with its eye of coal. Sauron knows your licence plate, and stares into your soul.
- ImageryHow To Be Green
- A boardgame: How to be Green…
- Australia, Doctors, Imagery, SpidersAustralian Spider Bite
- That spider bit me… am I going to become spiderman? No. This is Australia, you’re going to die.
- Animated, Chris Coutts, Flash, Imagery, No Effort OnlineChris Coutts: No Effort Online: What Does Suxor Mean 2
- Chris Coutts: No Effort Online flash animations
- English, GrammarIf Your A Grammar Nazi
- If your a grammar nazi and your reading this your gonna have a bad time.
- Flash, ImageryVision Test
- Vision Test.
- ImageryElephant Bone
- …just to confuse future archaeologists.
- Cars, Imagery, Italy, Racist, Risqué25 Year Old Escort
- But Mr. Berlusconi, you said, “Send a 25 years old escort to my villa!”
- Imagery, RisquéFingering A Minor
- Fingering A Minor for hours on my bed.
- Australia, PoliticalPsalm 2009 – 2012
- The First Book of Government.
- Cars, Imagery, Movies, Pulp Fiction, The RockHave You Seen Pulp Fiction?
- Have you seen Pulp Fiction? Yeah, but I didn’t like it.
- Geeky, Imagery, MeditationGeek Meditation Session
- In your mind’s browser, clear your cache… now delete your history… now navigate to a blank web page…
- Bananas, Food, Imagery, SausagesBanana Sausage
- Banana sausage…
- Imagery, Injuries, Sexist, SportMen & Women In Sport
- Women: No problem girls… I can go on. Men: Ahhhh! I’m dying.
- Animals, RisquéDoctor Bob Had Sex With One Of His Patients…
- Doctor Bob had sex with one of his patients and felt guilty all day long…
- Imagery, Music, Rap, Rock, SignsRap Loses To Rock
- Rap is like scissors, it always loses to rock.
- Computers, ImageryChecking On A Slow Progress Bar
- Checking on a slow progress bar.
- America, Capitalist, ImageryIn Capitalist America…
- Bank robs you!
- Animals, Cats, Glasses, ImageryBut These Are For Girls
- But these are for girls… Holy Crap! I look fabulous!
- Imagery, RisquéToo Long
- Her: Do you want to her a joke about my vagina? Nevermind… you’ll never get it! Her: Do you want to her a joke about my vagina? Nevermind… you’ll never get it!
- Food, Imagery, TurkeyRoast Turkey With A Doll Head
- I was watching TV when I head my Dad in the kitchen laughing to himself. When I got up to see what he was doing, I walked in on this…
- Australia, Chairs, Disaster, Earthquake, Imagery, MelbourneThe 2012 Melbourne Earthquake
- The 2012 Melbourne Earthquake: We will rebuild.
- English, GrammarYour There
- They’re they are.
- Animals, Elephants, ImageryIt’s Just One Of Those Days
- A baby elephant falls in the mud.
- Political, RacistLetter To America
- Letter to America
- Dalai Lama, Daleks, Dr Who, Imagery, Reincarnation, TvDalek Lama
- Reincarnate! Reincarnate!
- ☺Pregnancy & Women: Questions
- Pregnancy & Women: Frequently Asked Questions
- Imagery, Movies, RomanceGirlfriends: Harry Potter Versus Twilight
- Ginny: When Harry broke up with me for my safety…
- Hippies, Imagery, ShirtsPassive Agressive Hippie
- Passive Agressive Hippie: You want a [peace sign] of me?
- Animals, Chickens, Chicks, ImageryHow To Pick Up Chicks
- Instructional guide on how to pick up chicks.
- Apple, Imagery, Ios, Ios6, TransportApple IOS6 Maps
- For the benefit of passengers using Apple iOS6, local area maps are available from the booking office.
- Animals, ImageryNot Allowed
- When a dog is all out of luck.
- Darth Vader, Imagery, Kristen StewartMore Expressions Than Kristen Stewart
- Still more expressions than Kristen Stewart.
- Imagery, Jobs, Pie Charts, Statistics, WorkChance Of Keeping Your Job If You’re Wrong More Than 75% Of The Time
- Chance of keeping your job if you’re wrong more than 75% of the time.
- Anatidaephobia, Animals, Ducks, ImageryAnatidaephobia
- Anatidaephobia is the fear that somewhere in the world, there is a duck watching you.
- Cars, Gardens, ImageryMajor Tom’s Ground Control
- Major Tom’s Ground Control Lawn and Garden Management.
- Animals, Imagery, TurtlesYou’ll Never Be As Happy As This Turtle
- You’ll never be as happy as this turtle.
- Coffee, Religious, SexistMorning Coffee
- A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning…
- Geeky, Imagery, RomanceRoses Are #FF0000
- Roses are #FF0000, Violets are #0000FF.
- Australia, New Zealand, RacistKiwi Pig Sheep
- Voted Best Joke of the Year in Australia…
- Imagery, Sexist, TalkingWomen Use About 30,000 Words A Day
- Did you know that women use about 30,000 words a day while men use only 15,000?
- Imagery, Iphone, Phones, Romance, SmsThe Modern Day Romantic
- Goodnight my beautiful girl I’m so lucky to have you in my life. I love you so much <3
- Animals, Cats, Cockroaches, Dogs, Imagery, Men, WomenThe Circle Of Life
- The Circle of Life: Who is afraid of who?
- Cars, Imagery, MessagesThe 710 Cap
- Hun I have a problem in my car…
- America, Bear Arms, Constitution, Democracy, Imagery, Second AmendmentThe Second Amendment: The Right To Bear Arms
- The second amendment gives Americans the right to bear arms. I think many have taken this out of context.
- Imagery, WifiBasic Human Needs
- Basic human needs… like Wi-Fi.
- Bones, ImageryI Found This Humerus
- I found this humerus.
- English, ImageryMissing The Point
- Missing the point
- Imagery, Mistakes, PostersMake Some More Mistakes
- I’ve learned so much from my mistakes… I’m thinking of making a few more.
- Imagery, Shirts, TshirtsAttention Deficit Disorder
- Ask me about my attention deficit disorder or pie or my cat. A dog. I have a bike. Do you like TV? I saw a rock. Hi.
- Al Qaeda, Bin Laden, Imagery, Political, TerrorismI Usually Get 9/11
- I don’t always get rated on my terrorism attacks, but when I do, I usually get 9/11.
- Animated, Babies, Fireworks, ImageryFirst Time Seeing Fireworks
- A baby sees fireworks for the first time.
- Doorbells, Imagery, Logan, RacistLogan Doorbell
- To ring door bell, connect wires.
- Imagery, Music, Musical Instruments, Sex, Violence, ViolinsSax And Violins
- Warning: This image contains sax and violins. Viewer discretion is advised.
- Animals, ImagerySeven Sharks
- If you own 7 cats then people will think you’re crazy…
- Animals, Australia, Dropbears, Imagery, KoalasDrop Bears – Department Of Dangerous Fauna Management
- Dropbears are a very real danger to all Australians. Almost one in ten Australians has been attacked by a Dropbear, and the rate is even higher for foreign visitors. Don’t become another statistic. Always beware low branches and doorframes. Look up. Stay Alive.
- Alligators, America, Animals, Australia, Bears, Birds, Crocodiles, Europe, Imagery, Moose, Puma, Rabbits, Sharks, Snakes, SpidersMost Dangerous Animals
- How people in the colonies are still alive is beyond me…
- Imagery, Step Ladders, ToolsStep Ladder
- The Troubles of Being a Step Ladder…
- Imagery, RisquéJelly Orgy
- A jelly orgy.
- PoliticalPolitically Correct Primer
- A politically correct primer.
- Evolution, ImageryEvolution: Stop Following Me!
- The typical “evolution of man” poster, except the man is facing his “earlier ancestors” saying “Stop following me!”
- Facebook, Imagery, NewspapersReal Life Facebook
- I am trying to make friends outside of Facebook while applying the same principles…
- Imagery, Osama Bin Laden, Sport, Terrorists, Weight LiftingOsama Bin Liftin’
- Osama Bin Liftin’
- Imagery, Motorbikes, RisquéSexy Motorbike
- I am not too sure what to say about this…
- Animals, Golf, Imagery, Sport, TurtlesWorld’s Largest Golf Ball
- World’s largest golf ball. Gigantic turtle for scale.
- Blogs, Grammar, Imagery, SpellingMisspelt Blog Post
- You wouldn't think anyone reads my blog. I haven’t got a comment in weeks. Misspell something…
- Animals, Bread, Dogs, Food, ImageryI’m Inbred!
- I’m Inbred!
- Animals, Imagery, RisquéOld Style Birth Control
- Old Style Birth Control.
- Guns, Imagery, Mp3, Mp4, Mp5Well, That Escalated Quickly
- Well, that escalated quickly.
- Guns, ImageryThe Last Known Picture Taken Of Grandpa
- A woman inadvertently points a gun towards a man.
- Cables, Cables, Geeky, Imagery, UsbCables Exist In 4-dimensional Space
- Proof USB cables exist in 4-dimensional space.
- SexistMen’s Rules
- We always hear the rules from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side…
- Coolers, Imagery, SexistIf A Man Says He Will Fix It, He Will
- If a man says he will fix it, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months.
- Bsod, Geeky, Microsoft, WindowsBSOD: Blue Screen Of Death
- The dreaded blue screen of death…
- Animals, Djs, Fishing, Imagery, MusicDrop The Bass
- Can’t go fishing, ‘cause I always drop the bass…
- ToysThe Horror Of Blimps
- Some blimps are better off dead…
- Australia, Cars, Ghosts, Pub, Storm, SupernaturalA True Australian Ghost Story
- This story happened a short while ago near Brisbane, and even though it sounds a little Alfred Hitchcock… it’s (supposedly) true.
- Australia, Banks, ImageryAustralian Banks
- Australian Bank Logos.
- Batman, Imagery, WomenNana Nana Nana Batman!
- Nana Nana Nana Batman!
- RacistOnly In America...
- Only in America…
- PoliticalScientific Breakthrough – Governmentium
- A major research institution recently announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been named Governmentium.
- Food, Geeky, ImageryLOL For Lunch
- Ordering linguini for lunch always boosts morale.
- Animals, Imagery, Iphone, PhonesIt’s A Whale
- How do you have any friends…
- SexistCIA Assassin
- The CIA had an opening for an assassin…
- Christian, Imagery, Jewish, Muslim, RacistAn Atheist, A Jew, And A Christian Walk Into A Bar…
- An atheist, a Jew, and a Christian walk into a bar…
- Imagery, PoliticalThailand Has The Largest Mormon Population
- Did you know Thailand has the largest Mormon population in Africa?
- America, RacistA Russian Arrives In New York
- A Russian arrives in New York City as a new immigrant to the United States…
- Animated, Chris Coutts, Flash, Imagery, No Effort OnlineChris Coutts: No Effort Online: Ugly Whore
- Chris Coutts: No Effort Online flash animations
- Dating, Imagery, Relationships, SexistAnd Then I Said
- And Then I Said… The Differences Between Boys & Girls.
- Imagery, Math, PiWife Of Pi
- He’s irrational and he goes on and on…
- Animals, Dogs, ImageryA Dog Named Stay
- I bought a dog once. Named him ‘Stay’…
- Africa, Imagery, RacistEvery 60 Seconds In Africa
- Every 60 seconds in Africa… a minute passes.
- France, Germany, Imagery, RacistAngela Merkel Arrives At Passport Control At Paris Airport…
- Angela Merkel arrives at Passport Control at Paris airport. “Nationality?” asks the immigration officer. “German,” she replies. “Occupation?” “No, just here for a few days.”
- Advertising, Babies, Beer, Imagery, Mothers, VintageHow Mother And Baby “Picked Up”
- Blatz Beer: How Mother and Baby “Picked Up”.
- Animals, Animated, Bananas, Cats, ImageryCat & Banana
- The cat and the banana.
- Aerodynamics, Aeroplanes, ImageryAerodynamics Simplified
- How planes fly.
- ☺Disclaimer, Copyright & Contact Information
- Feel free to send me anything you think might amuse me.
- Political, SchoolMath Instruction
- At Heathrow Airport today…
- Computer Games, Geeky, Imagery, SexistXBOX Girlfriend
- A real girlfriend does not complain when her boyfriend is on his xbox…
- Duct Tape, Imagery, WorkEmergency Bridge Repair Team
- Duct Tape: Good for anything.
- Batman, Imagery, Superman, WonderwomanIt Is Such A Drag When Someone In The Group Can’t Fly…
- It is such a drag when someone in the group can’t fly… forcing everybody else to have to ride up the elevator too…
- Australia, Brisbane, Computer Games, Explosions, Guns, Imagery, PoliceBrisbane, GTA Style
- Queen Street Mall, Brisbane, GTA Style.
- Droids, Imagery, Star WarsLook, Sir. Droids!
- These are not the droids you are looking for.
- Jokes, RisquéWhere Is Amanda’s Husband?
- Amanda is 21 years older than her son John. In 6 years from now, Amanda will be 5 times as old as John…
- ImageryI See Dumb People
- I see dumb people… They are everywhere!
- Imagery, SpicesSeasons Greetings
- Seasons Greetings
- Animals, Horses, Imagery, SeahorsesSeahorse
- I’m a seahorse. Your argument is invalid.
- Accidents, Helmets, Imagery, Jamaica, Motorbikes, Risqué, SexistWhat’s The Main Reason For Motorbike Accidents In Jamaica?
- What’s the main reason for motorbike accidents in Jamaica?
- Joke, MathMath Problem
- John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now?
- Imagery, Numbers, Star WarsWhy Was Five Afraid Of Seven?
- Why was Five afraid of Seven? Because Six Seven Eight.
- Imagery, Jokes, ScrabbleScrabble Jokes
- I accidentally swallowed some scrabble tiles… My next dump could spell disaster.
- Acronyms, Imagery, Iphone, PhonesIDK LY TTYL
- IDK LY TTYL: I don’t know, love you, talk to you later.
- ImagerySound Thug
- Sound Thug
- English, ImageryLike If You Can Raed Tihs
- Like if you can raed tihs whit no porlqebm baecuas yuor jsut taht sarmt.
- Imagery, WifiWireless Networks
- Wireless networks could save your life!
- GeekyIf Dr Seuss Was A Technical Writer
- If Dr Seuss Was A Technical Writer.
- Geeky, Imagery, TechnologyBack-Up
- Image of man backing-up with computer.
- CarsMini Cooper
- A guy driving a Mini Cooper pulls up at a stoplight next to a Rolls-Royce…
- BabiesA Baby’s Laughter Is One Of The Most Beautiful Sounds You’ll Ever Hear
- A baby’s laughter is one of the most beautiful sounds you’ll ever hear. Unless it’s 3 AM, you’re home alone, and you don’t have a baby.
- Animals, Animated, ImageryLesson Of The Day
- You should never do anything wrong, it will catch up with you…
- Aeroplanes, Aircraft, Imagery, WarRequesting Air Support
- Requesting Air Support! “Believe in yourself. You can do it!”
- Animals, Dogs, ImageryHide Yo Kids!
- Hide yo kids! Hide yo wife!
- Animals, Giraffes, ImageryLet’s Get You Home Buddy
- Two giraffe having problems getting home.
- SexistA Love Story With A Happy Ending
- Once upon a time, a bloke asked a girl “Will you marry me?”
- Imagery, Risqué, SignsNo Public Motor Boating Permitted
- No public motor boating permitted.
- Animals, Geeky, Imagery, Math, SnakesSnakes On A Plane
- Snakes on a plane.
- For Sale, Imagery, Posters, PrintersPrinter For Sale
- Printer For Sale. Works Terribly.
- Imagery, RocksOrders From A Rock
- [On a rock] Turn me over. You just took orders from a rock.
- Imagery, Phones, Sms, SmsLost Phone
- A man sends SMS from a lost phone…
- Canada, Imagery, Protests, RiotsCanadian Riots
- Canadian Riots: Sorry to bother you, but perhaps you should take a break as our mayor?
- ☺Got To Love Drunk People
- >A man, and his wife are awakened at 3 o’clock in the morning by a loud pounding on the door…
- Geeky, JokesIntellectual Jokes
- Believing this statement will make you happier.
- Computers, Imagery, InternetNew Mail
- 10 years ago…
- Imagery, Posters, ScienceLost Wormhole
- Do not attempt capture because you’ll totally screw with the space/time continuum bro.
- Imagery, RisquéAdult Dog Store
- A dog carries an inflatable leg from an Adult Dog Store.
- ImagerySpring Is Just Around The Corner
- Finally… Spring is just around the corner.
- Animals, Beds, Dinosaurs, ImageryT-Rex Making A Bed
- When you’re upset just imagine a T-Rex making a bed.
- Aztecs, Imagery, Mayans, OreosMayan, Aztec And Oreos
- Mayan, Aztec and Oreos…
- Cars, ImagerySideways Car
- It’s a little confusing…
- SexistA Woman’s Wish
- A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit her ball into the woods…
- Animals, Giraffes, Imagery, SpidersGiraffe Spider
- A giraffe spots a spider…
- Imagery, Livestream, Nature, TechnologyLive Stream
- Can I call you back? I’m watching a live stream…
- Bananas, Food, Imagery, PhonesBanana Phone
- It’s a banana phone…
- Risqué, SexKeep Your Mouth Shut
- If you don’t believe in oral sex, keep your mouth shut!
- Bones, Imagery, SkeletonsThe Average Human Body Contains Enough Bones
- The average human body contains enough bones to make an entire human skeleton.
- Imagery, RisquéThumb War
- One, two three, four. I declare a thumb war…
- Girls, Imagery, Moon, Photography, Sexist, Space, WomenWent To The Moon, Took 5 Photos. Went To The Bathroom, Took 37 Photos.
- Went to the moon, took 5 photos. Went to the bathroom, took 37 photos.
- Imagery, SportHandegg
- Football versus Handegg: It’s not football…
- Imagery, Risqué, Tape Measures, ToolsBreakdown Of A Man’s Tape Measure Usage
- Breakdown of a man’s tape measure usage
- Imagery, Masturbation, RisquéI’m Starting To Think My Husband Masturbates
- I’m not absolutely certain yet, but I’m starting to think my husband masturbates
- Advertising, Australia, Billboards, CarsRAC Roadside Assistance Meltdown
- You don’t want to be stuck out here.
- ImageryWhen You Thought You Ran Over An Animal
- When you thought you ran over an animal but it was just a person
- France, Imagery, North Korea, RacistFrance Surrenders To North Korea
- France surrenders to North Korea
- Animals, Cats, ImageryI’m Glad You’re Up
- I’ve put all of your folded shirts on the floor for you.
- Animals, Crocodiles, ImageryCrocodile Lion
- An interesting dinnertime story…
- Imagery, Nigerians, Racist, ScamsRich Nigerians
- Nigerian man dies and authorities find billion in his apartment…
- Blonde, Fruit, Ginger, Hair, Imagery, Strawberries, WomenGinger Versus Strawberry Blonde
- This is a strawberry. This is ginger…
- Imagery, SpidersSpider’s Remember
- Remember when you threw a shoe at me and I fell somewhere behind the bed? I remember too.
- Imagery, SexistWomen: Yes, No, Maybe…
- I think I have that women-talk all figured out…
- Coronavirus, Gynaecology, ImageryVisiting Your Gynaecologist During Coronavirus
- Visiting your Gynaecologist during Coronavirus
- Imagery, SexistWoman With PMS
- Woman with PMS.
- America, RacistAmerican State Mottos
- American State Mottos…
- Cars, Imagery, PoliceMisleading The Public
- $100 for speeding and $250 for misleading the public…
- PoliticalMerry Christmas & A Happy New Year
- Merry Christmas & A Happy New Year.
- Animals, Animated, Imagery, PenguinsPenguin Falls
- Penguin falling on ice.
- Geeky, Imagery, Microsoft, MsnMSN Shuts Down
- We reminisce about “the good old days” of MSN…
- Accidents, Cars, Imagery, TrucksThe Road To Success
- On the road to success, there are no shortcuts…
- Animals, Broomsticks, Cars, Frogs, Imagery, Parking, Princesses, WitchesAll Others Will Be Toad
- Private customer parking only. All others will be toad.
- Babies, Court, Imagery, Jail, Judges3 Years In Jail For Stealing My Nose
- 3 years in jail for stealing my nose!
- Animated, Flash, Geeky, ImageryL33t H4x0r H4ml37
- Tales for the L33T PATR TOO - HAMLET
- Computers, GeekyUnix Commands
- Amusing UNIX commands.
- Facebook, InternetFacebook Farm
- A dying granny tells her granddaughter, “I want to leave you my farm…
- Bags, Imagery, ShoppingI’ll Be Bag
- A bag titled “I’ll Be Bag”
- ImageryMissed You...
- Image of a soldier pointing a gun towards the camera with caption “When you first left, I missed you badly… I WONT THIS TIME”
- Chewing Gum, Imagery, WarningsDo Not Swallow Chewing Gum
- Warning: Do not swallow chewing gum!
- Illusion, ImageryWhat Kind Of Sorcery Lets These Two Blocks Be The Same Color?
- One is dark, one is light. One is gray, one is white. These are obviously two different blocks with two different colors right? Wrong. The two blocks are the same color.
- Animals, DogsTalking Dog For Sale
- A man sees a sign outside a house – “Talking Dog for Sale.”
- Imagery, Winnie The PoohPooh Everywhere
- Watch your step, there’s pooh everywhere!
- Imagery, MoviesThere Are Three Kinds Of People: Impatient, Patient, And Rich.
- There are three kinds of people: Impatient, patient, and rich.
- Boobs, Imagery, Risqué, SexistAmazing Hidden Images
- Amazing Hidden Images!
- Babies, ImageryDraw Fake Eyebrows On Your Baby
- Draw fake eyebrows on your baby. Then sit back and enjoy the humour.
- Facebook, Imagery, Sexist, Sport, VolleyballLadies Beach Volleyball
- Just been watching Ladies Beach Volleyball, and there’s already been a wrist injury… but I should be OK by Friday.
- Geeky, ImageryOhm
- …ohm.
- Imagery, UniversityUniversity Website
- Things on the front page of a university website.
- Animals, Chocolate, Easter, Easter Bunnies, Imagery, RabbitsJust Some Bunny That I Used To Know
- Now you’re just some bunny that I used to know.
- Animals, Cats, Egyptians, Hieroglyphics, ImageryAncient Egyptians: Posting Cats To Their Walls Since 3150 BC
- Ancient Egyptians: Posting cats to their walls since 3150 BC
- SexistWinter Classes For Men
- Winter Classes for Men at the Learning Centre for Adults
- RisquéTarzan Sex
- When Jane initially met Tarzan of the Jungle, she was attracted to him, and during her questions about his life, she asked him how he had sex…
- Imagery, New Years, ResolutionsNew Year’s Resolutions – Again
- New Year’s Resolutions – Again
- Imagery, Odin, PoliticalVote Odin
- The left wing said they’d abolish poverty; right wing said they’d abolish bureaucracy. Odin said he’d abolish ice giants. Where are the ice giants? Vote Odin!
- Children, Cleaning, Imagery, MopsStupid Child Efficiency Mop
- Stupid Child Efficiency Mop. Wipe high-efficiently.
- Imagery, Psychotherapists, TherapyHappy People
- If you don’t see happy people, you need therapy!
- Children, ParentingWhy Parents Drink
- Why parents drink.
- ImageryI’m So Sick Of Not Being Understood!
- I’m so sick of not being understood! What do you mean?
- Alcohol, Goon, Imagery, Logan, Police, RacistLargest Goon Bust In Logan’s History
- Logan police in conjunction with the A.F.P. hauled in the largest goon bust in Logan’s history. With an estimated street value of $39.
- Children, Parenting, SportChild Beating
- A seven year old boy was at the centre of a courtroom drama…
- Animals, Imagery, SharksSharks Are A Lot Friendlier Without Pointy Teeth
- Sharks are a lot friendlier without pointy teeth.
- Animals, Bears, Cartoons, Imagery, PigsJackass Piglet
- Hi, my name’s piglet and this is Jackass.
- Illusion, ImageryHinton’s “Lilac Chaser”
- The Dotty Illusion…
- Imagery, ShipsA Ship Shipping Ship Shipping Shipping Ships.
- A ship shipping ship shipping shipping ships.
- Exams, Imagery, Signs, University, UqIn Class Vs. In Your Exam
- In class vs. in your exam.
- Atoms, Imagery, SignsDo Not Trust Atoms
- Do not trust atoms. They make up everything.
- Geeky, Imagery, Movies, The MatrixThe Matrix
- What is The Matrix?
- Australia, Cooking, God, Imagery, KitchensIn God’s Kitchen
- In God’s Kitchen: What are you cooking?
- Imagery, SexistEscape From The Kitchen
- You thought you could escape from the kitchen didn’t you?
- America, Britain, Political, Queen Elizabeth Ii, Queens, Racist, RoyaltyA MESSAGE FROM THE QUEEN
- A message to the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II.
- GeekyHow Many Does It Take...
- How many forum posters does it take to change a light bulb?
- Harry Potter, Imagery, SmsMaster Has Presented Dobby With Clothes! Dobby Is Free!
- Well I’m grounded. WTF did you do this time? My Mum asked me to do the laundry and threw a sock at me… I ran away screaming “Master has presented Dobby with clothes! Dobby is free!”
- Hammer, ImageryStop! Hammer Time
- Stop! Hammer Time!
- Books, Imagery, Sexist“Understanding Women” Now Available In Paperback
- The book “Understanding Women” is now available in paperback!
- ImageryMicrophone Eyes
- Microphone Eyes.
- Australia, Imagery, Nrl, Nsw, Qld, Rugby, SportNSW Playing Economically: 2 Punches Per Gallen.
- NSW playing economically. 2 punches per Gallen.
- Imagery, Men, SexistMen Have Feelings Too!
- Men have feelings too! For example, we feel hungry.
- Animals, Elephants, Imagery, RisquéElephant Upskirt
- Elephant Upskirt.
- Acid, Animals, Cats, Cocaine, Coffee, Drugs, Heroin, Imagery, Marijuana, Mushrooms, Shrooms, WeedDrug Cats
- An illustrated cat-guide to drugs…
- Comedians, Comedy, Grammar, Hitler, Imagery, JapanOne Thing Led To Another
- I hate when you’re reading something and you come across the phrase “one thing led to another”
- Accidents, Animals, Canada, Imagery, Moose, News, TvCanadian News
- Canadian News: Quebec snowmobiler dies after driving under a moose.
- Animals, Imagery, LlamasGet In The Llama
- No time to explain! Get in the llama…
- Geeky, ImageryDrowning, LOL!
- If you see someone drowning… LOL!
- Aeroplanes, Imagery, Oceans, SubmarinesSubmarines In The Sky
- Did you know that there are more planes in the sea than there are submarines in the sky?
- Cycling, Drugs, SportI Think It Is Just Terrible And Disgusting How Everyone Has Treated Lance Armstrong
- I think it is just terrible and disgusting how everyone has treated Lance Armstrong, especially after what he achieved, winning seven Tour de France races while on drugs. When I was on drugs, I couldn’t even find my bike.
- Betas, Bugs, Calendars, Cartoons, Imagery, MayansMayan’s Beta Calendar Bug
- …to get to the point; why does your calendar end in 2012? Oh, that’s just a temporary problem in the beta version!
- Bananas, Fruit, ImageryAppealing Attire
- I find this attire… appeeling.
- Children, Imagery, PaintChildren Painting
- Two children, half a room and a TV covered in white paint.
- Imagery, SexistHair Dryer
- Darling, please give me the hair dryer…
- Animals, Fire, Imagery, SpidersThere Was A Spider, I Panicked
- There was a spider, I panicked. But I think it’s gone now.
- Animals, Cats, Dogs, JokeWoof
- How do you get a cat to bark like a dog?
- Boobs, Imagery, RisquéBoob Staring
- Shirt: Please tell your boobs to quit staring at my eyes.
- Geology, Imagery, SchoolGeology
- Name the three types of rock.
- Fruit, Grapes, ImageryBeware The Grapes Of Wrath
- Beware the Grapes of Wrath.
- Illusion, ImageryConfused Carpentry
- A Carpenter’s Nightmare.
- Animals, Imagery, Lightbulbs, Mice, Risqué, SexHow Many Mice Does It Take To Screw In A Lightbulb?
- How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
- Animals, Boobs, Imagery, SlothsLook At This Boob
- Look at this boob. This is a nice boob.
- Famous People, Imagery, Movie StarsReese Witherspoon
- Reese Withoutherspoon.
- Ice, Imagery, MindpowerMelt Ice With My Mind
- I can melt ice with my mind… just give me a few minutes…
- Animals, Imagery, SealsSeal This Opening
- I was told to seal this opening, so here I am.
- Cars, Geeky, Imagery, SqlSpeed Camera Hack
- Car with SQL injection taped to the front.
- Feminists, Imagery, Lightbulbs, Sexist, WomenHow Many Feminists Does It Take To Change A Lightbulb?
- How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Don’t be silly, feminists can’t change anything!
- Geeky, Imagery, Internet, Pie ChartsTime Breakdown Of Modern Web Design
- The breakdown of modern web design.
- Coffee, Hipsters, Imagery, SignsHow Did The Hipster Burn His Tongue?
- How did the hipster burn his tongue? He sipped on his coffee before it was cool.
- Australia, France, Imagery, Racist, RisquéAustralian Kiss
- Australian Kiss: same as a French Kiss… but down under.
- Australia, Imagery, Kevin Rudd, PoliticalKevin Rudd’s Ego
- Kevin Rudd’s Ego.
- SexistPunctuation Is Powerful.
- Punctuation is powerful.
- Boobs, Imagery, Risqué, SexistDream Girl
- Girl on beach with six breasts.
- Animals, Bananas, Birds, Food, Imagery, ParrotsBanana Parrot Terrorism
- A parrot eating bananas.
- ImageryLow Battery Warning
- Plug in or find another power source. Or panic now!
- Animals, Bears, Guns, ImageryWhat Is The Smallest Calibre You Trust To Protect Yourself?
- I remember one time while hiking with my girlfriend in northern Alberta and out of nowhere came this huge brown bear charging us, and was she mad!
- English, Grammar, QuotationsAmusing Quotes & One-Liners
- Amusing Quotes & One-Liners.
- Imagery, MilkLying About Skim Milk
- There’s only one thing I hate more than lying. Skim milk, which is water that’s lying about being milk.
- ImageryButtons
- Lots of buttons…
- Apple, Imagery, Ipad, Portal, Technology, ValveValve’s “Portal”, As An IPad Decoration.
- Valve’s “Portal”, as an iPad decoration.
- Computer Games, Imagery, MarioIt’s A-me, Mario!
- Mario emerging from a drainpipe.
- Aboriginal, Australia, Gay, RacistAboriginal Jobs
- At the end of a tiny, deserted bar is a huge Aboriginal bloke…
- Bikes, Geeky, It, SexistAn IT Student Is Walking Along With His Bike…
- An IT student is walking along with his bike…
- Imagery, InternetProcrastination
- Have a little look at the Internet…
- Imagery, Sexist, WomenFeminine Instincts
- If a girl ever pulls out a knife on you during an argument, pull out some bread and mayo. Her feminine instincts will kick in and she’ll make you a sandwich.
- Cars, Imagery, Time TravelAnnual Meeting Of Time Travellers
- Annual Meeting of Time Travellers.
- Farmers, Imagery, Men, Swimming, WomenThe Clever Old Man
- One evening an old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn’t been there for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny dipping in his pond…
- Imagery, School24 Chickens
- 24 Chickens: The shoe rack at the front door…
- Animated, ImageryWait!
- Wait…
- Grammar, Imagery, TomorrowTomorrow (noun)
- Tomorrow (noun): a mystical land where 99% of all human productivity, motivation and achievement is stored.
- Joke, RisquéJam And Butter The Muddy Plasters, The Dirty Bucket Of Pitch!
- Jam and butter the muddy plasters, the dirty bucket of pitch!
- Australia, SexistAussie Men
- Aussie men… struggling with the booze…
- Books, Imagery, Racist, ShopsWong Fook Hing Book Store
- If you cannot find the book that you are looking for, then you’re obviously in the… Wong Fook Hing Book Store!
- Animals, Cats, Imagery, Mayans, PredictionsWorst Apocalypse Ever
- [A grumpy cat the day the Mayan calendar ended] “Still Here. Worst Apocalypse Ever.”
- SexistMen Are Happier
- Men are Happier: What do you expect from such simple creatures?
- EnglishThe Gender Neutral Term For Sugar Daddy
- The gender neutral term for sugar daddy is glucose guardian.
- Beer, Geeky, Imagery, WorkUltimate Camouflage
- An office beer fridge…
- Advertising, Gay, Imagery, Ovaltine, VintageTo Wake Up Gay In The Morning…
- To wake up gay in the morning just try this at Bedtime Tonight!
- Animated, Chris Coutts, Flash, Imagery, No Effort OnlineChris Coutts: No Effort Online: Tales For The L33T: PATR TOO: HAMLET
- Chris Coutts: No Effort Online flash animations
- Animals, Imagery, SealsSeal The Deal
- What do you say we go behind this rock and seal the deal?
- ImageryPolice Station Toilet Stolen
- Police Station Toilet Stolen… Cops have nothing to go on.
- Australia, Games, Imagery, ReligiousThanks God
- God and the Rubiks Cube…
- Imagery, Kim Jong-un, North Korea, SnickersKim, Eat A Snickers
- Kim Jong-un: I’m going to nuke everyone. Kim, eat a Snickers. Kim: Why? Because you turn into a war mongler when you’re hungry. Better? Kim: Better.
- Ice Cream, ImageryI Scream Cone
- I Scream Cone.
- Alcohol, Imagery, SexistLet’s Go For A Drink…
- Goldstar Beer Ads: What goes through the mind of men and women when they’re asked to go for a drink…
- InvisibleYou Can See Me?
- Next time a stranger talks to me when I’m alone I will look at them shocked and just whisper quietly, “you can see me?”
- Imagery, Movie Posters, PiranhasPiranhas On An Escalator
- If I were you, I’d take the stairs…
- Animals, ImageryFalling Cows
- A roadsign showing a cow falling off a cliff and onto a car.
- RacistFerrari Sack Pit Crew
- The Ferrari Formula 1 Team fired their entire pit crew yesterday…
- Geeky, RisquéEUNUCH Programmer's Manual - CONDOM(1)
- The EUNUCH Programmer's Manual - CONDOM(1)
- Facebook, Geeky, Imagery, InternetGoogle+ Versus Facebook
- Google Plus versus Facebook
- Imagery, PhonesJack’s Phone
- Why aren’t you answering…?
- Camping, Grammar, Imagery, TentsYou Can’t Run Through A Campground
- You can’t run through a campground. You can only ran, because it’s past tents.
- George Bush, Imagery, Iran, Political, Weapons Of Mass Destruction, WmdI Can’t Believe The “WMD” Trick Is Working Again With Iran
- I can’t believe the “WMD” trick is working again with Iran. Suckers…
- Food, ImageryWurst Nightmare
- Hi. I’m your wurst nightmare.
- Imagery, Psychotherapists, SignsPsycho The Rapist
- Psycho the Rapist It’s one word George!
- Cars, ImageryHonked At A Prius
- Honked at a Prius, scared the crap out of it.
- SchoolThe History Of The World
- The History of the World, as written by the next generation…
- America, English, Imagery, RacistEnglish (Traditional) And English (Simplified)
- English (Traditional) and English (Simplified).
- JokesToday Is Sunday
- Attention! Today is Sunday. Share this on your Facebook wall. Within seven days you’ll get another Sunday…
- Cake, Ikea, ImageryHappy 25th Birthday IKEA!
- Happy 25th Birthday IKEA! Here’s your cake
- Animals, Cupcakes, Food, Imagery, LemursA Lemur Who Has Discovered The Wondrousness Of Cupcakes For The Fist Time.
- A lemur who has discovered the wondrousness of cupcakes for the fist time.
- Animated, Chris Coutts, Flash, Imagery, No Effort OnlineChris Coutts: No Effort Online
- Chris Coutts: No Effort Online flash animations
- Imagery, Jail, Logan, RacistI’m From Logan
- I killed a man. You? I’m from Logan.
- Animals, ImageryUsed Cows
- Used Cows for Sale.
- Imagery, Metaphors, Star WarsMetaphors Be With You
- Metaphors be with you
- ☺The World’s Shortest Books
- The World’s Shortest Books
- Imagery, MusicI’m Not Just Another Brick In The Wall
- We don’t need no education…
- Comics, Guns, Hands, ImageryHands In The Air!
- Hands in the air! Now wave them around like you just don’t care!
- Police, RisquéPanties
- Policewoman: Anything you say will be taken down!
- Boobs, Imagery, Sexist, WomenI Wish These Were Brains
- Sexist, but contains breasts…
- Australia, Chillis, Food, Racist, TexasAn Australian Chilli Tester In Texas…
- An Australian chilli tester in Texas…
- ImageryCharlie Sheen For Halloween
- No, you can’t be Charlie Sheen for Halloween.
- Animated, Coffee, ImageryAnimated Coffee
- Coffee with emotion.
- Geeky, ImageryDelete Cookies
- Delete cookies?!
- Actors, Famous People, Imagery, Movie Stars, Robert De NiroRobert De Niro, De Faro
- First Robert De Niro, then Robert De Faro.
- Animals, Cows, Horses, ImageryThis Guy’s An Idiot! Quick, Take A Picture!
- This guy’s an idiot! Quick, take a picture!
- Animals, Cats, ImageryHello Kitty
- It’s sickeningly cute. Perhaps literally if its expression is anything to go by…
- Cats, Comics, ImageryPop Out Of Bed
- If people were meant to pop out of bed we’d all sleep in toasters.
- Imagery, Real EstateLaminated Room
- List of reasons why a room would have to contain a bucket and be almost entirely laminated: 1) Bad reasons.
- Advertising, Billboards, ImageryThere Are Two Rules For Success
- There are two rules for success: Never reveal everything you know…
- Browsers, Chrome, Firefox, Imagery, Internet Explorer, Opera, SafariBrowsers: Their Differences
- The differences between the major web browsers.
- America, Canada, RacistU.S. Ship Versus Canadian
- U.S. Ship versus Canadian.
- Babies, Imagery, PregnancyHow Babies Are Made
- How babies are made (with an air pump).
- Boobs, Imagery, RisquéWater Enhanced Breasts
- Water Enhanced Breasts…
- Imagery, Risqué, SexistThe Lift
- A man and woman meet outside an elevator door…
- Animals, Birds, Chickens, Imagery, MarriageMarriage: Before & After (Chicken Style)
- Marriage: Before & After (Chicken Style).
- JokesComplimentary Pretzels
- A guy walks into a bar and takes a seat. Before he can order a beer, the bowl of pretzels in front of him says “Hey, you’re a handsome fellow.”
- Animals, Geckos, Trumpets, TrustYou Know What Doesn’t Grow Back, Susan? Trust!
- You know what doesn’t grow back, Susan? Trust!
- ImageryWhy Women Live Longer Than Men
- Genetics - Why women live longer than men.
- America, Animals, Australia, Birds, Eagles, Imagery, RacistAmerican Bald Eagle Vs Australian Wedge Tail Eagle
- American Bald Eagle vs. Australian Wedge Tail Eagle.
- GeekyUnusual EBay Feedback
- A+++! Would read this amusing page again…
- RisquéThe Hypnotist
- It was entertainment night at the senior centre and the Amazing Claude was topping the bill…
- English, GrammarParaprosdokians
- Paraprosdokians are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous.
- Apple, Imagery, Iphone, Iphone 6, PhonesIPhone 6 Comparison
- iPhone 6 Plus Comparison.
- Board Games, Games, ImageryGroup Therapy
- …is not going to make Q any less of a hated letter.
- Animals, Cats, Dogs, ImageryAnimals That Didn’t Expect Their Humans To Come Home So Early!
- Animals that didn’t expect their humans to come home so early!
- Animals, Dogs, Imagery, SpidersSpider Dog
- Spider Dog…
- Comics, ImageryThe Street Is Closed
- Oh no—we’re trapped in here. The street is closed.
- Advertising, Imagery, Sexist, VintageDormeyer Crying Wives
- Wives: Look this ad over carefully. Circle the items you want for Christmas. Show it to your husband. If he does not go to the store immediately, cry a little…
- Imagery, WaterThe Deadly Facts About Water
- The Deadly Facts about Water
- Imagery, PhonesPhone Tails
- That’s right dear, our ancestors had tails.
- WorkRejection Response
- The next time you get a rejection letter from a hoped-for employer or publisher, just send them the following…
- Animals, Food, ImageryBoiled Lobster
- “I hate the way they scream when you boil them!”
- RacistAmerican History 101
- American History 101
- Earth, ImageryHeld Hands Around The Equator
- If the human population held hands around the equator, a significant portion of them would drown.
- Apple, Computers, Imagery, Phones, Religious, Steve JobsI Have An APP For That!
- Steve Jobs, 1955 – 2011.
- ImageryAlzheimer’s
- “I may have alzheimer’s, but at least I don’t have alzheimer’s”
- Animals, Cars, Driving, Imagery, KoalasDon’t Worry I’m Koalafied To Drive
- Don’t worry I’m Koalafied to drive.
- America, Guns, RacistWhat Do You Call A Gun Enthusiast?
- You may have heard on the news about a Southern California man who was put under 72-hour psychiatric observation when it was found he owned 100 guns and allegedly had 100,000 rounds of ammunition stored in his home…
- Bipolar, Graffiti, Imagery, SignsBipolar Awesome
- I hate being bi-polar. It’s awesome.
- Bankruptcy, Divorce, Imagery, LiquorBankruptcy, Divorce, Liquor
- Bankruptcy, Divorce, Liquor.
- Dba, Geeky, Imagery, SqlDBA/SQL Humour
- An SQL query walks into a bar, goes up to two tables and asks, “May I join you?”
- Advertising, Feminine Hygiene, Imagery, Sexist, VintagePlease, Dave… Please Don’t Let Me Be Locked Out From You!
- Please, Dave… please don’t let me be locked out from you! For complete feminine hygiene rely on Lysol – a concentrated germ-killer!
- Fortune Cookies, ImageryYou Are Not Illiterate.
- You are not illiterate.
- ShoppingGrocery Shopping On An Empty Stomach
- Accidentally went grocery shopping on an empty stomach and now I’m the proud owner of aisle 4.
- Imagery, Shirts, Tourettes, TshirtsWhat Do We Want? A Cure For Tourettes!
- What do we want? A cure for tourettes! When do we want it? …
- ImageryProof That Not Knowing Everything Is The Best Way To Go
- Proof that not knowing everything is the best way to go.
- Animated, Australia, Imagery, Internet, Political, TelstraBuilding The NBN From Telstra Copper
- Building the NBN from Telstra Copper
- CatsHappy Pussy
- A collection of amusing cat pictures.
- Fans, Metal, MusicMetal Fan
- What kind of music do you like? I am a huge metal fan. Me too!
- Animals, Dogs, ImagerySo We Got Pugsy A New Chew Toy…
- So we got Pugsy a new chew toy…
- Illusion, ImageryThe Angry/Calm Illusion
- The Angry/Calm Illusion.
- Archaeology, Canada, Cars, Imagery, SnowCanadian Archaeology
- Canadian Archaeology: Digging a car out from under the snow
- Political, RisquéHillary Clinton Goes To Her Doctor For A Physical…
- Hillary Clinton goes to her doctor for a physical…
- Africa, Animals, Bikes, ImageryUpsetting The Food Chain
- A zebra on a motorbike…
- Accidents, Buses, Cars, Imagery, InsuranceDon’t You Suggest To Me What To Do
- If you don’t have GIO Third Party Property Insurance, we suggest you don’t hit this bus.
- Imagery, Signs, SpringSpring Is Here. I’m So Excited I Wet My Plants!
- Spring is here. I’m so excited I wet my plants!
- Australia, Games, Imagery, MonopolyAustralian Monopoly
- Australian Monopoly: St Marys to Penrith Special Edition.
- Advertising, Cigarettes, Imagery, Risqué, Sexist, VintageBlow In Her Face
- Blow in her face and she'll follow you anywhere.
- Babies, Imagery, InstructionsBaby Instructions
- Some useful instructions to keep baby alive and well…
- Hunger Games, Imagery, Katniss Everdeen, Kristen Stewart, Movies, Movie Stars, Smiling, TwilightKristen Stewart Smiles
- I don’t always smile, but when I do, I don’t.
- Cars, ImageryGarage Door Covers
- Amusing garage door covers
- Geeky, InternetGoogle
- Try Google. Available in six of the world’s most common languages…
- ImageryLegoland Will Never Be The Same...
- Legoland will never be the same…
- Children, Dating, Imagery, Internet, RisquéLittle Kid Lover
- I’m signing up for an online dating service. I just need to pick a username. “Little Kid Lover”, that way people will know where my priorities are at.
- Advertising, Clothing, Fashion, Imagery, SexistWhy Men Die Before Women
- Why men die before women.
- Cars, ImageryCar Alarms
- Car alarms: They piss me off!
- Animals, Imagery, Lord Of The Rings, OttersFilthy Hobitses
- Filthy Hobitses
- ImageryEmoticons
- Lots of emoticons…
- ImageryBribing Santa
- Dear Santa, if you leave a new bike under the tree, I will give you the antidote to the poison I put in the milk.
- Animated, Illusion, Imagery, Impossible Triangle, Penrose TrianglePenrose Triangle
- Penrose Triangle Animation.
- Illusion, ImageryRound Illusion
- Unusual round illusion.
- ImageryVegetative State
- Vegetative State.
- PoliticalOrdering Pizza In The Year 2025
- Ordering pizza in the year 2025…
- Animals, Cats, ImageryDid You Try Jumping Off The Refrigerator Too?
- Did you try jumping off the refrigerator too?
- Animals, Imagery, OctopusesDrunk Octopus Wants To Fight
- Drunk Octopus Wants to Fight…
- America, Coronavirus, Imagery, Political, Presidents, TrumpInject Yourselves With Disinfectant!
- Inject Yourselves with Disinfectant!
- Cars, Imagery, Irish, RacistIrish Car
- An advertisement in an Irish Newspaper…
- Animals, ImageryWhat Animals Dream...
- What animals dream.
- Coronavirus, Imagery, Video Conferencing, Work, ZoomCoronavirus Zoom Conference
- Zoom Conference: Can everyone hear me?
- Alcohol, ImagerySlimming Drink
- You look so much better after a glass or two!
- Buildings, Jokes, Physicists, PunsA Physicist Sees A Young Man About To Jump Off The Empire State Building
- A physicist sees a young man about to jump off the Empire State Building…
- Imagery, Steve IrwinDoesn’t Protect From Harmful Rays
- Puts on sunblock. Doesn’t protect from harmful rays.
- Animals, Bananas, Dogs, Food, ImageryBanana Dogs
- Banana Dogs.
- Animals, Imagery, LlamaA Shaved Llama
- A shaved Llama
- Animals, Cats, Imagery, SignsHelp Cat Neds Air
- Please don’t let the cat out. No matter what it tells you!
- Art, Geeky, ImageryNational Portrait Gallery
- National Portrait Gallery. National Landscape Gallery…
- Imagery, Notices, Paper, SignsPaper Says Yes
- Would you like a little piece of paper that says yes to hang onto during the tough times ahead? (Maybe it will help)
- ☺100 Guidelines On Becoming An Evil Villain
- World domination is everyone’s dream. It’s not a bad job really…
- Imagery, SmsBack From The Dead
- Woo, it’s me! Back from the dead!
- Risqué, Sexist, WorkSentence Structure: Why Sentence Structure Is Important
- Sentence Structure: Why sentence structure is important.
- Animals, Crocodiles, Crocs, ImageryMother Croc
- Look how instinctively the mother croc carries the baby in its mouth.
- Guitars, Imagery, MusicFree Air Guitars
- Christmas Gift Ideas: Free Air Guitars.
- Australia, Cricket, Imagery, VideoHow Cricket Looks To Most People
- How Cricket Looks to Most People.
- Boobs, Imagery, Risqué, Sexist, WorkJob Application
- Sexist job application.
- English, Etymology, Imagery, Languages, SpanishEntero Somewhere Elso
- English: Do Not Enter Here; Spanish: Entero Somewhere Elso.
- Bathrooms, Coronavirus, Imagery, Public TransportExperts Recommend Keeping Your Daily Rituals Even While Working From Home
- Experts recommend keeping your daily rituals even while working from home
- Geeky, ImageryIPad Stone
- iPad versus a stone.
- English, WordsI’m Awkward When People Compliment Me…
- I’m awkward when people compliment me… “Nice hair” Me: “Thanks, I grew it myself”
- Imagery, Risqué, SexistInteresting ATM
- Man using a sexually provocative ATM.
- Animated, Chris Coutts, Flash, Imagery, No Effort OnlineChris Coutts: No Effort Online: There’s Something About Osmethne
- Chris Coutts: No Effort Online flash animations
- Australia, Iraq, PoliticalThe Australian Constitution: For Iraq
- They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq…
- Imagery, Memory, Protests, RalliesBetter Memory
- What do we want? Better memory! When do we want it? Want what?
- Australia, Imagery, Matches, Pauline Hanson, Political, Redheads, RednecksRednecks
- Redneck Matches…
- Illusion, ImageryTwelve Or Thirteen?
- Wait until the group changes position. Is it twelve or thirteen?
- Earth, Imagery, Risqué, Solar SystemDon’t Masturbate
- Don’t Masturbate!
- Animals, Cats, ImageryOn A Roll
- Don’t try to stop me… ‘cause I am on a roll.
- Imagery, TeaMr. Tea
- Mr. Tea the teapot.
- Batman, Imagery, Iphone, Phones, SmsI’m Batman
- SMS conversation between Tim and Batman.
- America, Australia, Birds, Horror Movies, Imagery, MagpiesAustralian Horror Story
- American Horror Story versus Australian Horror Story
- Cartoons, Comics, Imagery, MoviesThe Bat Cave
- The location of our Bat Cave is meant to be secret, so stop checking in!
- Animals, Cats, Dogs, ImageryJust Being A Cat
- Dog attacks person. Put dog to sleep. Cat attacks person. LOL, jus’ bein’ a cat.
- Daughters, Families, Imagery, MothersMum, What’s It Like To Have The Greatest Daughter In The World?
- Mum, what’s it like to have the greatest daughter in the world? I don’t know dear… you’ll have to ask grandma.
- ImageryWhat Is A Sonofabitch?
- What is a sonofab*tch, exactly?
- Darth Vader, ImageryBreathe Right
- Darth Vader going for some Breathe Right.
- America, Cia, Cocaine, Coke, Drugs, ImageryCIA: We Put The Coke In America
- CIA: we put the coke in America.
- Evolution, Imagery, ZombiesZombie Evolution
- The evolution of Zombies
- Animals, RisquéThe Lone Ranger
- The Lone Ranger was ambushed and captured by an Indian war party…
- Bmw, Cars, Imagery, WorkBrand New BMW
- The owner of the company where I work pulled up in his brand new BMW this morning…
- Computer Games, Imagery, SexistCall Of Duty: Women’s Edition
- Call of Duty: Women’s Edition.
- ☺News Headlines
- Amusing news headlines
- Cats, Imagery, MailboxesMailman Jumped 15 Feet
- Mailman jumped 15 feet. Dog was right. This is fun.
- Imagery, MathImaginary Friend
- Aww, how cute. He has an imaginary friend!
- Adelaide, Australia, Chairs, Disaster, Earthquake, ImageryThe 2011 Adelaide Earthquake
- The 2011 Adelaide Earthquake: We will rebuild.
- Animated, Chris Coutts, Flash, Imagery, No Effort OnlineChris Coutts: No Effort Online: Tales For The L33T: ROMEO+JULIET
- Chris Coutts: No Effort Online flash animations
- Aboriginal, Australia, RacistAboriginal Spongebob Spotted In Cairns
- Aboriginal Spongebob spotted in Cairns.
- Risqué, Sexist, ViagraDealing With Hunger Pangs
- A woman asks her partner at breakfast time, “Would you like some bacon and eggs a slice of toast and, maybe, some grapefruit juice and coffee?”
- Imagery, Ipad, IphoneFree IPhone To IPad Upgrade
- Free iPhone to iPad Upgrade
- Animated, Geeky, Imagery, PhotoshopAdobe Photoshop CS6 Has Stopped Working
- The realest photography struggle ever…
- ImagerySimple Eye Examination Test
- A simple eye examination chart.
- Drugs, Homophobia, Imagery, Marijuana, MedicalMedical Marijuana
- What disease is your medical marijuana relieving?
- Animals, Imagery, SlugsFeeling Sluggish
- I’ve been feeling a bit sluggish…
- Imagery, SexistAlways Love A Woman For Her Personality
- Always love a woman for her personality. They have like 10, so you can choose.
- Religious, Risqué, WorkCorporate Lessons
- Corporate lessons.
- Marriage, SexistSecrets To A Happy Marriage
- Secrets to a Happy Marriage…
- English, WordsWhat Is A Word Made Up Of 4 Letters Yet Is Also Made Up Of 3
- What is a word made up of 4 letters yet is also made up of 3. Although is written with 8 letters, and then with 4. Rarely consists of 6, and never is written with 5.
- Computers, ImageryInsert Disk Two
- Please insert disk two.
- Diets, Food, Paleolithic DietPaleolithic Diet
- Something’s just not right—our air is clean, our water is pure, we all get plenty of exercise, everything we eat is organit and free-range, and yet nobody lives past thirty.
- Advertising, ImageryColgate Dental Floss Advertising Campaign
- Colgate have created an ingenious campaign to promote their dental floss.
- Drugs, Imagery, Meth, R2-d2, Robots, Star WarsMeth: Before & After
- Meth: Before & After (or R2-D2 versus R2-FU).
- ReligiousThe Pope Is Busted
- After getting all of Pope John Paul’s luggage loaded into the limo…
- Animals, Chocolate, Dogs, Heaven, ImageryA Dog Dies: Can I Have Chocolate?
- A dog dies and finds out chocolate killed him.
- Boats, Fishing, Imagery, Logan, RacistFishing, Logan Style
- Fishing, Logan Style.
- Computer Games, Geeky, Imagery, WorkMario: Happy
- Quit your day job and do what makes you happy.
- Animals, JokeThe Dead Rabbit
- The Dead Rabbit, aka The Worst Joke Ever…
- Alphabet, Games, ImageryAlphabet Game
- The Alphabet Game is a car game played to amuse travellers on long car rides.
- Animals, Imagery, ZebrasI Love You Zebra
- Bite marks are love notes written in flesh. I love you zebra.
- Animals, Imagery, SharksMisunderstood Sharks
- Misunderstood Sharks.
- Imagery, Math, SchoolI’ll Just Be A Stripper.
- Screw this: I’ll just be a stripper.
- Food, ImageryThrowing People
- A tomato’s fear.
- Comics, English, ImageryThe Accidental Conversation Loop
- My greatest social fear: The Accidental Conversation Loop.
- Imagery, Israeli, Palestinian, Political, RacistIsraeli Settlers
- Of course we want peace–this piece and this piece and this piece and this piece…
- Imagery, Sexist, Tv, WomenCooking Shows
- If we watched cooking shows the way guys watch sports.
- RisquéMonica
- Monica walks into her dry cleaning store…
- Animals, Imagery, Johnny Depp, Movie Stars, SpidersI’m Really Afraid Of Johnny Depp
- Research shows that if you’re afraid of spiders, you’re more likely to find one in your bedroom. I’m really afraid of Johnny Depp.
- Autocorrect, Imagery, Iphone, SmsBroken Penis
- I broke my penis and it exploded all over my pants.
- Fire, ImageryFire Distinguisher
- Fire Distinguisher: Yep, that’s fire…
- Imagery, MoviesNeville
- Neville would have done it in four books.
- Calendars, Comics, Imagery, MayansThe Mayan Calendar
- I only had enough room to go up to 2012…
- Imagery, WorkHorse Whisperer
- A very amusing workplace complaint.
- Imagery…and So It Was.
- It’s a Bird! It’s a Plane!
- Balls, Illusion, ImageryAll The Balls Are The Same Colour!
- All the balls are the same colour — and that colour is brown
- Chat, Imagery, InternetChat Rooms
- Chat Rooms – you never really know.
- Bikes, Imagery, NoticesBicycles Chained To These Railings Will Be Removed Without Notice.
- Bicycles chained to these railings will be removed without notice. This is a notice, you idiot!
- Einstein, ImageryYou Matter
- You are living, you occupy space, you have a mass… you matter.
- Animals, Animated, Hamsters, ImageryHamster Flying
- How to make your hamster fly…
- Apple, Computers, Imagery, Religious, Steve JobsHe’s Gonna Upgrade Your Tablets…
- Moses, meet Steve. He’s gonna upgrade your tablets…
- Beer, Calendars, Imagery, Mayans, Predictions2 Mayan Guys
- [2 Mayan Guys] Wanna beer? I’m working on this calendar, but I guess if I don’t finish it won’t be the end of the world.
- Imagery, TattoosFree Tattoo Removal
- Free (and perhaps painful) tattoo removal.
- Cars, Dumbledore, Harry Potter, Imagery, PetrolExpecto Petroleum!
- Expecto Petroleum!
- Imagery, Monday, Punch, WorkThe Monday Punch
- The Monday Punch: A man punched in the face.
- Evolution, Imagery, SexistThe Evolution Of Man And Woman
- The Evolution of Man & Woman…
- Imagery, Seniors, WarDrafting Guys Over 60
- New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!
- Cars, Computer Games, Geeky, ImageryGamers: The Mentality
- Objects in mirror are losing.
- Animals, Elephants, Imagery, Kenya, ZoosMan & Elephant
- In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Louisiana State University…
- Imagery, Joke, Mayans, PredictionsMayan Joke Set-Up
- Heh… I’ve just thought of a joke with the longest set-up ever! Cool! I’ll fetch a scribe…
- Animals, Circuses, Dwarfs, Hippopotamuses, ImageryHippo Eats Dwarf
- A hippopotamus has swallowed a dwarf in a circus accident…
- Cold, Flu, Illness, Imagery, Man Flu, SexistMan Flu
- The difference between men & women when they are sick.
- Facebook, Imagery, TattoosTough Tattoos
- Tough Tattoos: You Don’t Have to Like Me.
- WorkHow To Get A Day Off Work
- How to get time off in the public service…
- Animals, Imagery, Languages, Latin, PigsPig Latin
- Pig Latin…
- Artists, Justin Bieber, MusiciansDear Justin Bieber Haters
- I owe my life to Justin Bieber…
- Animals, Fish, ImageryCan February March? No, But April May.
- Can February March? No, but April May.
- Animals, ImageryWireless Technology
- “It is a bit freaky with this wireless technology”
- Imagery, Motorbikes, SportOh Look, A Penny
- Oh look, a penny!
- Animals, Beavers, Birds, Cats, Dogs, Fish, Frogs, Horses, Imagery, Puns, Rabbits, ZebraPunny Animals
- Who ever invented the “knock-knock jokes” should get a no-bell prize!
- Geeky, Imagery, Ninjas, Pirates, ZombiesSurvival Tracking Guide
- The Pirate, the Ninja, & the Zombie…
- Animals, Cats, Egyptians, God, ImageryHow To Distract An Egyptian God
- How to distract an Egyptian God
- Alcohol, Australia, Bob Hawke, Imagery, Oxford, PoliticalBob Hawke’s Yard Of Ale
- While at university at Oxford in 1963, Bob Hawke, former Prime Minister of Australia, entered the Guinness Book of Records here at the Turf Tavern after downing a yard of ale (that’s just over 2½ pints!) in just 11 seconds.
- Accidents, Animals, Cats, Imagery, LaddersHumans Don’t Land On Their Feet
- Gee you’re right, humans don’t land on their feet.
- Illusion, ImageryMoving Illusion
- A psychedelic illusion where a brightly coloured non-moving image appears to be pulsating in and out.
- Canada, RacistAn Ontarian Wanted To Become A Newfie…
- An Ontarian wanted to become a Newfie…
- Money, Quotations, SchwarzeneggerHaving More Money Doesn’t Make You Happier
- Having more money doesn’t make you happier. I have 50 million dollars but I’m just as happy as when I had 48 million.
- Boats, Burials, Cemetries, Funerals, Imagery, SexistBoat Funeral
- A funeral procession pulled into a cemetery. Several carloads of family members followed a black truck towing a boat with a coffin in it…
- Babies, ImageryNow Airtight
- Now airtight… to prevent aging!
- ImagerySteady Hand – The Results
- Steady Hand – The Results (or what happens when you play Steady Hand)
- Computers, Geeky, Imagery, Linux, Mac, WindowsUpdate Available
- An update is available for your computer…
- Imagery, Internet, SwordsSwords Of The Centuries
- Swords of the Centuries
- Imagery, ShopsBall-type Deodorant
- Her: Is it the ball-type deodorant you want sir? Him: Oh no miss – it’s for under my arms!
- Imagery, SexistRealistic Remotes
- Some more useful remote controls we would like to see.
- Babies, Imagery, RisquéI Will Deprive You Of Sex
- I will deprive you of sex all night with my crying and then suck on your wife’s tits in the morning.
- Imagery, Money, Monopoly, StrippersMonopoly Money For Fake Boobs
- I think it’s only fair to throw monopoly money at strippers with fake boobs.
- ☺Idiots
- Idiots everywhere…
- Animals, ImageryHow Dishwashers Really Work
- How dishwashers really work…
- Imagery, Jokes, Paper, Puns, SignsTearable Puns
- These are tearable puns.
- Animals, Cats, Imagery, MetallicaMettalicat
- Mettalicat: Sleeps with one eye open, gripping his pillow tight.
- Animals, Harry Potter, Horses, ImageryWingardium Levi-horse-a
- Wingardium levi-horse-a!
- Advertising, Imagery, Sexist, VintageHappier With A Hoover
- Christmas morning she’ll be happier with a Hoover.
- Beer, ChartsBeer Troubleshooting Chart
- Beer Troubleshooting Chart.
- Facebook, Imagery, RisquéFacebook Sex
- Taking status updates too far.
- Animals, Cars, Cows, Drunk, ImageryDrunk Cows
- Drunk Cows: Bruce you are drunk.
- Funerals, Imagery, Italian, RacistThe Italian Funeral
- Pasquale died. His will provided ,000 for an elaborate funeral…
- Boats, Books, Fishing, Reading, Sexist, WomenNever Argue With A Woman
- Never Argue with a Woman…
- Animals, Animated, Australia, Emus, Imagery, KangaroosKangaroo Kicks Boy
- A kangaroo kicks an unsuspecting boy into a dam while an emu strolls past.
- Imagery, Lord Of The Rings, Lotr, PizzaBrace Yourself. Pizza Is Coming.
- Brace Yourself. Pizza is coming.
- Arguments, English, Grammar, ImageryArgument Typo
- Heh I was almost forced to face the fact that my argument was bad but I see here that you made a typo hahaha tough luck pal.
- Flash, ImagerySteady Hand – A Game Of Skill
- A game of skill, requiring a steady hand and keen eye – make sure you play at least the first two levels…
- GeekyHuman Hotfix
- Hotfix Patch for Humans released.
- Children, Parenting, SchoolLetter To A Mother / School Report
- It is with great happiness that I’m telling you that I eloped with my new boyfriend…
- ImageryTechnically Correct
- …but still wrong.
- Imagery, MedicalHearing Aids
- Hearing aids…
- Animals, Imagery, SharksFlying Sharks
- Flying sharks… we’re screwed.
- Australia, Imagery, Logan, RacistAll Trades Logan
- All Trades Logan.
- America, Animated, Imagery, Obama, PoliticalThanks, Obama
- Thanks, Obama.
- Animals, Imagery, Spiders, ZombiesZombie Apocalypse Spider
- I laugh at your claims to bravely take on a zombie apocalypse, when most of you can’t stand up to a spider.
- Animals, Cats, Imagery, RacoonsCat Found
- Cat Found. Very aggressive.