Ned Martin’s Amused Categories

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Ned Martin’s Amused Pages

Cold, Flu, Illness, Imagery, Man Flu, SexistMan Flu: The difference between men & women when they are sick.
America, France, Ireland, Irish, Racist, RisquéThe Penis Study: The American Government funded a study to see why the head of a man’s penis was larger than the shaft…
America, Cia, Cocaine, Coke, Drugs, ImageryCIA: We Put The Coke In America: CIA: we put the coke in America.
Animals, Dogs, Education, Elephants, Exams, Fish, Imagery, Monkeys, Penguins, School, SealsOur Education System: [To an assorted group of animals] Our Education System: For a fair selection everybody has to take the same exam: Please climb that tree.
Bankruptcy, Divorce, Imagery, LiquorBankruptcy, Divorce, Liquor: Bankruptcy, Divorce, Liquor.
Fire, Fire Extinguishers, ImageryFire Extinguisher Fire: Fire Extinguisher Fire: What do you do now?
Animals, Imagery, WhalesThe Hey Whale: The Hey Whale. It defies description.
Advertising, ImageryColgate Dental Floss Advertising Campaign: Colgate have created an ingenious campaign to promote their dental floss.
Alcohol, Books, Imagery, WineBook Club: My book club only reads wine labels.
Geeky, Imagery, Ninjas, Pirates, ZombiesSurvival Tracking Guide: The Pirate, the Ninja, & the Zombie…
Air Force, Fighter Jets, Imagery, Jets, NavyWrong Button: Fighter jet hits the wrong button.
Jewellery, Jokes, Puns, RingsSomeone Stole My Mood Ring: Someone stole my mood ring.
Animals, Dogs, ImageryHide Yo Kids!: Hide yo kids! Hide yo wife!
History, ImageryThe Most Difficult Thing To Explain To Someone From The 1950s: If someone from the 1950s suddenly appeared today, what would be the most difficult thing to explain to them about life today?
Calendars, Comics, Imagery, MayansThe Mayan Calendar: I only had enough room to go up to 2012…
Geeky, ImageryDied: …from not forwarding that text message to 10 people.
Animals, Crocodiles, Crocs, ImageryMother Croc: Look how instinctively the mother croc carries the baby in its mouth.
Animals, Cats, Imagery, WorkI Used To Smile… Until I Worked Retail.: I used to smile… until I worked retail.
Children, Cleaning, Imagery, MopsStupid Child Efficiency Mop: Stupid Child Efficiency Mop. Wipe high-efficiently.
Illusion, ImageryCrazy Sphere: A crazy sphere
Imagery, Potatoes, Vegan, VegetablesVegan Potatoes: Vegans are evil…
Batman, Imagery, Iphone, Phones, SmsI’m Batman: SMS conversation between Tim and Batman.
Geeky, Imagery, MeditationGeek Meditation Session: In your mind’s browser, clear your cache… now delete your history… now navigate to a blank web page…
Anatidaephobia, Animals, Ducks, ImageryAnatidaephobia: Anatidaephobia is the fear that somewhere in the world, there is a duck watching you.
America, Animals, Australia, Birds, Eagles, Imagery, RacistAmerican Bald Eagle Vs Australian Wedge Tail Eagle: American Bald Eagle vs. Australian Wedge Tail Eagle.
Bananas, Food, George Bush, ImageryThis Banana Tastes Funny: “This banana tastes funny” – George Bush.
Imagery, SexistCall The Rescue Squad!: I’m sorry dear. I can’t hear you. I’m in the kitchen, making you a sandwich.
Imagery, SignsDon’t Grow Up: Don’t grow up. It’s a trap.
Bananas, Chris Brown, Food, Imagery, RihannaChris Brown & Rihanna Bananas: I can’t believe she didn’t press charges. It got worse when he posted the unpeeled photos of her.
Computers, Imagery, Passwords, TechnologyNew Password Can’t Be Old Password: Enter password. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong…
Accidents, Animals, Cats, Imagery, LaddersHumans Don’t Land On Their Feet: Gee you’re right, humans don’t land on their feet.
Animals, ImageryNot Allowed: When a dog is all out of luck.
English, GrammarBipolar Awesome: English can be weird. It can be understood through tough thorough thought, though.
Boobs, SexistTen Things Men Know About Women: Ten things men know about women…
Exams, Imagery, Signs, University, UqIn Class Vs. In Your Exam: In class vs. in your exam.
Business Cards, Geeky, Imagery, Notepad, WindowsNotepad Business Card: A business card styled to look like Windows Notepad.
Imagery, Math, SchoolI’ll Just Be A Stripper.: Screw this: I’ll just be a stripper.
Animals, Birds, Crows, Imagery, TrucksCrows Killed By Trucks: Why are so many crows killed by trucks?
Imagery, MathImaginary Friend: Aww, how cute. He has an imaginary friend!
Bananas, Food, Imagery, ZucchinisGreen Banana: Green banana…
Imagery, Ipad, IphoneFree IPhone To IPad Upgrade: Free iPhone to iPad Upgrade
Advertising, Guns, Imagery, Revolvers, VintageIsn’t It Time You Gave Yourself A Christmas Gift?: Isn’t it time you gave yourself a Christmas Gift?
Australia, Condoms, New Zealand, Racist, RisquéAustralian Condoms: New Zealand runs out of condoms…
Drugs, Food, ImageryEminem Drug Bust: Eminem Drug Bust.
Australia, Games, Imagery, Logan, Monopoly, RacistLogan Monopoly: Logan Monopoly…
Einstein, Imagery, Phones, TechnologyThe Day Einstein Feared: The day that Einstein feared may have finally arrived.
Bananas, Cars, Food, ImageryGet In The Banana: No time to explain. Get in the banana!
Aboriginal, Australia, Imagery, Racist, The RockStolen Generator: So I heard about the stolen generation…
Facebook, ImageryFacebook Illusion: Facebook: Providing the illusion you have friends since 2004!
Alcohol, Imagery, SexistLet’s Go For A Drink…: Goldstar Beer Ads: What goes through the mind of men and women when they’re asked to go for a drink…
Imagery, Paper, Plants, TreesIrony: Drawing Trees On Paper: Irony: Drawing trees on paper.
Advertising, Apple, Imagery, Iphone, Phones, Samsung, Samsung Galaxy, TechnologyApple IPhone 20 & Samsung Galaxy S23 – Sword & Shield: A mock-up of the iPhone 20 and Samsung Galaxy S23, after the launch of the “taller” iPhone5 & the larger Galaxy S3.
Animals, Bread, Dogs, Food, ImageryBread Dog: The Amazing Bread Dog.
Helpline, Imagery, Phones, YogaYoga Emergency Hotline: Yoga Emergency Hotline, how may I help you?
Cars, Imagery, PoliceMisleading The Public: $100 for speeding and $250 for misleading the public…
Imagery, MoviesNeville: Neville would have done it in four books.
☺Foot Smart: See if you can outsmart your foot…
Animals, Animated, Hamsters, ImageryHamster Flying: How to make your hamster fly…
Imagery, Real EstateLaminated Room: List of reasons why a room would have to contain a bucket and be almost entirely laminated: 1) Bad reasons.
Imagery, Mexico, RacistMexico’s National Sport: What is Mexico’s national sport? Cross country.
Food, Imagery, TurkeyRoast Turkey With A Doll Head: I was watching TV when I head my Dad in the kitchen laughing to himself. When I got up to see what he was doing, I walked in on this…
Apple, Imagery, Ipad, Portal, Technology, ValveValve’s “Portal”, As An IPad Decoration.: Valve’s “Portal”, as an iPad decoration.
ImageryKermit Sees The Doctor: Have a seat Kermit. What I’m about to tell you might come as a big shock…
Animals, Cats, Godzilla, Imagery, KittensGodzilla Kitten: Terrifyingly cute…
Imagery, SexistIron Man Competition: Ironman Competition - the way it should be…
Animals, Birds, Chickens, Imagery, MarriageMarriage: Before & After (Chicken Style): Marriage: Before & After (Chicken Style).
Animals, Horses, Imagery, SeahorsesSeahorse: I’m a seahorse. Your argument is invalid.
ImageryMissed You...: Image of a soldier pointing a gun towards the camera with caption “When you first left, I missed you badly… I WONT THIS TIME”
Animals, Fish, Girls, ImagerySaved A Fish From Drowning: Here is a heart warming picture of a little girl that saved a fish from drowning.
Apple, Imagery, Iphone, Iphone 6, Nokia, PhonesIPhone 5 Plus Versus Nokia 3310: iPhone 6 Plus versus Nokia 3310: Does it bend?
America, Canada, RacistU.S. Ship Versus Canadian: U.S. Ship versus Canadian.
Computers, Geeky, It, Technology101 Things You Do Not Want...: 101 Things You Do Not Want Your System Administrator to say.
Imagery, Jail, Logan, RacistI’m From Logan: I killed a man. You? I’m from Logan.
Australia, France, Imagery, Racist, RisquéAustralian Kiss: Australian Kiss: same as a French Kiss… but down under.
Imagery, WorkHorse Whisperer: A very amusing workplace complaint.
ReligiousThe Atheist & The Bear: The Atheist and the Religious Bear
SexistMars Vs. Venus: Mars versus Venus…
Evolution, ImageryEvolution: Stop Following Me!: The typical “evolution of man” poster, except the man is facing his “earlier ancestors” saying “Stop following me!”
Buses, Bus Stops, Harry Potter, Hogwarts, ImageryBus To Hogwarts: To get the bus to Hogwarts, please run directly at this sign.
Animals, Beaches, Imagery, Signs, Stingrays, WarningsShuffle Your Feet For Stingrays: Shuffle your feet for Stingrays: One of the many dangers in Australian waters.
Illusion, ImageryRound Illusion: Unusual round illusion.
Animals, Australia, Emus, WarEmu War: Result: Emu Victory.
Cling-wrap, Imagery, WorkCling-wrap Fun: Cling-wrap fun.
Astronauts, Coronavirus, Imagery, Nasa, SpaceCoronavirus Space Crew: Congratulations, your mission is now complete. You may return to Earth.
WorkExecutive Test: The following short quiz consists of four questions and will tell you whether you are qualified to be a “professional”…
Computer Games, Computers, ImageryPlay Outside: It’s a beautiful day. I really want you to go outside and play.
Animals, Birds, Chickens, Imagery, Rock And RollChook Heavy Metal Guitarist: A heavy metal guitarist chicken
ImagerySpring Is Just Around The Corner: Finally… Spring is just around the corner.
Imagery, RisquéDangers Of Masturbation: The Dangers of Masturbation.
Feminists, Imagery, Lightbulbs, Sexist, WomenHow Many Feminists Does It Take To Change A Lightbulb?: How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Don’t be silly, feminists can’t change anything!
Cars, Computer Games, Geeky, ImageryGamers: The Mentality: Objects in mirror are losing.
America, Guns, Imagery, Police, RacistAnd I Was All Like, Pew Pew Pew!: And I was all like, pew pew pew! Pew pew pew! ‘Merica!
Evolution, Imagery, SexistThe Evolution Of Man And Woman: The Evolution of Man & Woman…
Birth Control, Imagery, RisquéEffective Birth Control: The most effective birth control method known to man.
Betas, Bugs, Calendars, Cartoons, Imagery, MayansMayan’s Beta Calendar Bug: …to get to the point; why does your calendar end in 2012? Oh, that’s just a temporary problem in the beta version!
Africa, Animals, Imagery, MoviesThe Lion King: Proof At Last: Pumbaa & Timon…
Imagery, Paper, SignsIs It Me You’re Looking For?: Hello? Is it me you’re looking for?
ImageryMichael Jackson's Dog: A rather mean impression of what Michael Jackson’s dog might look like, if it had similar surgery.
ImageryProblem Solving Flowchart: A simple, and humorous, flowchart that successfully troubleshoots almost any problem you can think of.
Computers, ImageryChecking On A Slow Progress Bar: Checking on a slow progress bar.
Alcohol, Animated, Fire, Imagery, Racist, Russia, SneezingIn Russia People Sneeze Fire: In Russia people sneeze fire after drinking lots of vodka.
Canada, Flutes, Imagery, SignsCanada Has A Serious Epidemic: Protect yourself and others from the flute.
Geeky, InternetGoogle: Try Google. Available in six of the world’s most common languages…
America, Democracy, PoliticalHow To Know When You’ve Met A Democrat: Just in case you have trouble knowing when you’ve met a Democrat…
Cake, Ikea, ImageryHappy 25th Birthday IKEA!: Happy 25th Birthday IKEA! Here’s your cake
Animals, Imagery, RisquéHow To Eat Pussy…: How to eat pussy…
Animals, Chickens, Chicks, ImageryHow To Pick Up Chicks: Instructional guide on how to pick up chicks.
Animals, Cats, ImageryI’m Glad You’re Up: I’ve put all of your folded shirts on the floor for you.
America, Britain, Political, Queen Elizabeth Ii, Queens, Racist, RoyaltyA MESSAGE FROM THE QUEEN: A message to the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II.
Animals, Circuses, Dwarfs, Hippopotamuses, ImageryHippo Eats Dwarf: A hippopotamus has swallowed a dwarf in a circus accident…
Boats, Imagery, Rowing, WarRow Row Row Your Boat: Row row row your boat. Shut up Carl.
Animals, Camels, Children, Donkeys, ImageryYour Child Is Being Eaten By A Camel: Your child is being eaten by a camel. Do you… a) Save your child, or b) Take a photo?
Imagery, Queensland, WinterI Absolutely Love Winter In Queensland.: I absolutely love winter in queensland. Last year it was a Wednesday.
Imagery, Sexist, TalkingWomen Use About 30,000 Words A Day: Did you know that women use about 30,000 words a day while men use only 15,000?
Bikes, ImagerySquare Bike: Surprisingly good riding down stairs… not so good on the flat.
Cars, ImageryHonked At A Prius: Honked at a Prius, scared the crap out of it.
Aliens, ImageryFunniest Alien Fan Art I’ve Seen: Funniest Alien Fan Art I’ve Seen.
Imagery, RelationshipsA Woman Hid Under The Bed: To see her husband’s reaction, a woman wrote on a paper: “I left, I’m not coming back.” Hidden under the bed, the woman waited for her husband to arrive. He walked into the room, saw the paper, wrote something on the paper, and put himself to sing, all satisfied. 5 minutes later, he took his cell phone and called someone: “I’m going now. The other nut’s gone. I’m on my way, remember I love you so much” He took the car and left. Mad in anger, the woman comes out under the bed and reads what he wrote… “I can see your feet. I went for bread. Stop being retarded and make dinner…”
Imagery, Newspapers, TechnologyAll This Technology Is Making Us Antisocial: All this technology is making us antisocial: A tram full of people ignoring each other and reading the newspaper.
Imagery, MoviesThere Are Three Kinds Of People: Impatient, Patient, And Rich.: There are three kinds of people: Impatient, patient, and rich.
PoliticalAbbott And Costello Go To Washington: Abbott And Costello Go To Washington.
Australia, Bank Notes, Banks, Imagery, Money, PoliticalAustralian Bank Notes: Australian Bank Notes.
Imagery, SexistHair Dryer: Darling, please give me the hair dryer…
ImageryI’m So Sick Of Not Being Understood!: I’m so sick of not being understood! What do you mean?
ImageryStatistics That Matter: The Pie Chart: A new take on the traditional pie… chart.
Animals, Cats, Dogs, ImageryDear Dog: Dear Dog… a letter from the cat.
ToysThe Horror Of Blimps: Some blimps are better off dead…
Flying, Imagery, SportFlying – Because Golf Only Takes One Ball: Flying – because softball, baseball, football, basketball, soccer, bowling and golf only take one ball.
Animals, Cats, Imagery, MetallicaMettalicat: Mettalicat: Sleeps with one eye open, gripping his pillow tight.
Imagery, WifiBasic Human Needs: Basic human needs… like Wi-Fi.
Biology, Imagery, MathBiology, Multiplication And Division: Biology – the only science where multiplication and division mean the same thing…
Imagery, Lord Of The Rings, Lotr, PizzaBrace Yourself. Pizza Is Coming.: Brace Yourself. Pizza is coming.
Alphabet, Doctors, ImageryThe Medical Alphabet: The Medical Alphabet
Computers, Imagery, InternetNew Mail: 10 years ago…
Imagery, Jokes, ScrabbleScrabble Jokes: I accidentally swallowed some scrabble tiles… My next dump could spell disaster.
Blonde, Cars, SexistBlondeStar: What to do when you’re locked inside your car, and the keys are outside…
ImageryFingers Move: I think you’re spending too much time on the computer. Your fingers move when you talk…
English, ImageryLike If You Can Raed Tihs: Like if you can raed tihs whit no porlqebm baecuas yuor jsut taht sarmt.
Alcohol, Computers, Geeky, Imagery, Microsoft, WindowsWindows: File Missing: Windows cannot find the file. Would you like some wine instead?
Animals, Dogs, ImageryFunny Dog: The longer you look, the funnier it gets!
Animals, Drugs, Imagery, RabbitsHigh Rabbits: Two rabbits getting high on marijuana.
Imagery, PinterestIf You Like It Then You Shoulda Put A Pin On It: If you like it then you shoulda put a pin on it!
Australia, Imagery, Kevin Rudd, PoliticalKevin Rudd’s Ego: Kevin Rudd’s Ego.
Arthur C Clarke, Astrology, QuotationsI Don’t Believe In Astrology: I don’t believe in astrology; I’m a Sagittarius and we’re sceptical.
Canada, RacistAn Ontarian Wanted To Become A Newfie…: An Ontarian wanted to become a Newfie…
Geeky, History, Internet, ItHow The Internet Started: A History Lesson: How the Internet Started: A History Lesson.
Accidents, Buses, Imagery, Rivers, Wildlife DocumentariesA Wild Bus Drinking Water: And here we see a wild bus drinking water from a river.
Animals, Cats, ImageryJust Wait Until I’m Fully Charged: Just wait until I’m fully charged…
WorkMergers: Amusing mergers.
Banks, ImageryI Was Going To Make A Joke About A Bank, But Then I Lost Interest…: I was going to make a joke about a bank, but then I lost interest…
Cars, Computer Games, ImageryLegend Of Zelda: A legend… of Zelda.
Imagery…and So It Was.: It’s a Bird! It’s a Plane!
Animated, Babies, Fireworks, ImageryFirst Time Seeing Fireworks: A baby sees fireworks for the first time.
Fish, Imagery, MermaidsReverse Mermaid: You are alone on an uninhabited island. Which of these would you choose as your companion?
Asian, Imagery, Iphone, Racist, RiceIf Your Phone Gets Wet, Try Placing It In A Bag Of Rice: If your phone gets wet, try placing it in a bag of rice. At night, the rice will attract Asians who will fix your electronics for you.
Advertising, Apple, Imagery, Iphone, Phones, TechnologyIPhone 10 – The Tallest IPhone Yet: A mock-up of the iPhone 10, after the launch of the “taller” iPhone5.
Cars, Imagery, Logan, My Family Stickers, Racist, StickersLogan My Family Stickers: Logan My Family Stickers.
Animals, Apples, Cats, Imagery, MathSeven Cats: If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?
Imagery, WaterThe Deadly Facts About Water: The Deadly Facts about Water
Archaeology, Canada, Cars, Imagery, SnowCanadian Archaeology: Canadian Archaeology: Digging a car out from under the snow
Imagery, Math, PiWife Of Pi: He’s irrational and he goes on and on…
America, Animals, Australia, Britain, Cows, India, Irish, PoliticalYou Have Two Cows: The eponymous cows is used to demonstrate the advantages and flaws of certain economic systems.
ImagerySuperman’s Social Network Nightmare: Superman’s Social Network Nightmare.
☺Dear Thigh Fat: Help the needy?
Food, ImageryBreakfast Alive: What happens if you wait too long before eating your breakfast?
Animals, Dogs, Drugs, High, ImageryDog, How High Are You?: Dog, how high are you? Yes.
Animals, Australia, Cockatoos, Flies, Imagery, Kangaroos, Kookaburras, Magpies, Possums, Snakes, Spiders, SunburnTypically Australian Problems: Some typically Australian problems that other people don’t face.
AlcoholCalm Living: I am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me today, and we all could probably use more calm in our lives.
SexistA Woman’s Wish: A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit her ball into the woods…
Australia, Condoms, New Zealand, Racist, RisquéKiwi Condoms: Australia runs out of condoms…
Food, ImageryLittle Green Balls Of Death: Little Green Balls of Death
Advertising, Imagery, Men, Sexist, SignsThis Year Thousands Of Men Will Die From Stubbornness…: This year thousands of men will die from stubbornness. No we won’t.
Cars, Imagery, Movies, Pulp Fiction, The RockHave You Seen Pulp Fiction?: Have you seen Pulp Fiction? Yeah, but I didn’t like it.
Animals, Imagery, SharksMisunderstood Sharks: Misunderstood Sharks.
Cars, PoliceSpeed Camera: Speed camera revenge…
Daleks, Dr Who, Food, Garlic, Imagery, TvGarlek: Garlek.
Aboriginal, Australia, RacistAboriginal Eggs: Two Aboriginal lads are riding along the Hume Highway on a motorbike…
Boobs, Imagery, RisquéBoob Staring: Shirt: Please tell your boobs to quit staring at my eyes.
Babies, Imagery, InstructionsBaby Instructions: Some useful instructions to keep baby alive and well…
Buildings, Jokes, Physicists, PunsA Physicist Sees A Young Man About To Jump Off The Empire State Building: A physicist sees a young man about to jump off the Empire State Building…
Animals, Elephants, ImageryIt’s Just One Of Those Days: A baby elephant falls in the mud.
Animals, Cats, Imagery, Mayans, PredictionsWorst Apocalypse Ever: [A grumpy cat the day the Mayan calendar ended] “Still Here. Worst Apocalypse Ever.”
Imagery, SexistHow Could You Be So Insensitive?: How Could You Be So Insensitive? This is what it looks like from the other person’s perspective.
Animals, Ducklings, Ducks, ImageryBeware Of Cute Duckling Scam: Beware of Cute Duckling Scam…
Asian, Facebook, Imagery, RacistHumans Of Sunnybank: In Asia culture, it’s important for wife to trust husband and let him be the leader in the house. That’s why after I am married, I will always leave big decision to him – for example, choosing between buy me a Chanel for birthday or go sleep on sofa for a whole month instead.
Animals, Books, Dolphins, Imagery, LibrariesTo Punch A Dolphin In The Mouth: 5 very good reasons to punch a dolphin in the mouth.
Canada, Imagery, Protests, RiotsCanadian Riots: Canadian Riots: Sorry to bother you, but perhaps you should take a break as our mayor?
SexistEx Wife: The police came to my front door last night holding a picture of my ex-wife…
Risqué, SexistThe Perfect Password: A woman was helping her husband set up his computer, and at the appropriate point in the process, the computer advised him that he would now need to enter a password…
Animals, Crocodiles, ImageryCrocodile Lion: An interesting dinnertime story…
Accidents, Imagery, Logan, Racist, WindowsLogan Repair: Another quality repair job by Logan City Council.
Dyslexia, Imagery, Sex, Shirts, TshirtsI Have Sex Daily: I have sex daily! I mean dyslexia! Fcuk.
Advertising, Gay, Imagery, Ovaltine, VintageTo Wake Up Gay In The Morning…: To wake up gay in the morning just try this at Bedtime Tonight!
Animals, Imagery, SharksShark! What?: Shark! What?
Fish, ImageryThe Swordfish: The swordfish has few predators to worry about in the wild, except for the seldom seen penfish which is said to be even mightier.
WorkHow To Get A Day Off Work: How to get time off in the public service…
Australia, Cars, Ghosts, Pub, Storm, SupernaturalA True Australian Ghost Story: This story happened a short while ago near Brisbane, and even though it sounds a little Alfred Hitchcock… it’s (supposedly) true.
Food, Imagery, Microwaves, ScienceNo Science In This Microwave: Food only. Absolutely no science in this microwave.
Cars, ImageryGarage Door Covers: Amusing garage door covers
Animals, Cats, Dogs, ImageryCat: The Dog Went Missing: Cat: The dog went missing? Hahaha! Hahaha! I’m sorry human. Hahaha… no seriously, I’m so sad…
Guitars, Imagery, MusicFree Air Guitars: Christmas Gift Ideas: Free Air Guitars.
Canada, Etiquette, ImageryHolding Doors: Holding Doors: A Question of Distance.
Animated, Coffee, ImageryAnimated Coffee: Coffee with emotion.
Imagery, Step Ladders, ToolsStep Ladder: The Troubles of Being a Step Ladder…
Elderly, Hearing Aids, ImageryExpensive Hearing Aid: A man was telling his neighbour, “I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it’s state of the art. It’s perfect.”
Adelaide, Australia, Chairs, Disaster, Earthquake, ImageryThe 2011 Adelaide Earthquake: The 2011 Adelaide Earthquake: We will rebuild.
Imagery, Sexist, Tv, WomenCooking Shows: If we watched cooking shows the way guys watch sports.
Arguments, English, Grammar, ImageryArgument Typo: Heh I was almost forced to face the fact that my argument was bad but I see here that you made a typo hahaha tough luck pal.
Animals, Imagery, RabbitsWhat Rabbits Do: What rabbits do when humans go out…
Chinese, Imagery, Racist, Tattoos, WomenIf Chinese People Tattooed Lame English Words On Themselves…: If Chinese people tattooed lame English words on themselves…
Chocolate, Geeky, Homes, Honey, Imagery, Milk, PhonesQuite Literally…: I phone, you tube. Hi honey, I’m home. Chocolate milk shake.
Comics, ImageryThe Street Is Closed: Oh no—we’re trapped in here. The street is closed.
CatsHappy Pussy: A collection of amusing cat pictures.
Political, RacistLetter To America: Letter to America
Einstein, ImageryYou Matter: You are living, you occupy space, you have a mass… you matter.
Drugs, Imagery, Meth, R2-d2, Robots, Star WarsMeth: Before & After: Meth: Before & After (or R2-D2 versus R2-FU).
Imagery, SnowDead Snowmen: Gruesomely dead snowmen.
ImageryBird Flu: I’m not worried about this bird flu…
Camping, Grammar, Imagery, TentsYou Can’t Run Through A Campground: You can’t run through a campground. You can only ran, because it’s past tents.
Animals, ImageryUsed Cows: Used Cows for Sale.
Computer Games, Imagery, Microsoft, XboxXbox One Vs. An Ordinary Brick: Xbox One vs. An Ordinary Brick: Price, DRM Free, Requires Internet, Region Locked…
Animals, Imagery, RacoonsOh… Hi… Umm… Meow?: Oh… hi… Umm… meow?
GeekyHow Many Does It Take...: How many forum posters does it take to change a light bulb?
Alcohol, Drunk, ImagerySlur In Cursive: When I drink, I don’t slur my words… I speak in cursive.
Australia, New Zealand, RacistKiwi Pig Sheep: Voted Best Joke of the Year in Australia…
Alligators, America, Animals, Australia, Bears, Birds, Crocodiles, Europe, Imagery, Moose, Puma, Rabbits, Sharks, Snakes, SpidersMost Dangerous Animals: How people in the colonies are still alive is beyond me…
Bsod, Geeky, Microsoft, WindowsBSOD: Blue Screen Of Death: The dreaded blue screen of death…
Geology, Imagery, SchoolGeology: Name the three types of rock.
Blacks, Imagery, RacistBlacks For Sale: They can still do that?
Alcohol, Animals, Dogs, Imagery, Skateboards, Smoking, WineBad Dog Is Banned From The Park: I don’t know who this dog is or why he is banned from this park, but he certainly seems like a lot of fun.
Animated, Australia, Imagery, Internet, Political, TelstraBuilding The NBN From Telstra Copper: Building the NBN from Telstra Copper
Accidents, Helmets, Imagery, Jamaica, Motorbikes, Risqué, SexistWhat’s The Main Reason For Motorbike Accidents In Jamaica?: What’s the main reason for motorbike accidents in Jamaica?
Imagery, New Years, ResolutionsNew Year’s Resolutions – Again: New Year’s Resolutions – Again
Animals, ImageryAntique Tables: Made Daily…
Facebook, Imagery, MoneyHow To Make Money From Facebook: How to make money from facebook: 1) just go to “Account Settings”; 2) Press “Deactivate your account”; 3) Go to work.
Accidents, Aeroplanes, Imagery, LuggageClosing Airline Luggage Doors: Closing Airline Luggage Doors.
Animals, Dogs, ImageryDog Poo Bin: If your dog does a poo please put it in a litter bin.
Imagery, Political, Politicians, Prostitutes, RisquéHonest Politician: Hi! I’m 32. I’m a politician and I’m honest. Hi. I’m 29, I’m a prostitute and I’m a virgin.
Imagery, Osama Bin Laden, Sport, Terrorists, Weight LiftingOsama Bin Liftin’: Osama Bin Liftin’
America, Imagery, Political, SpyingMy Computer Hard Drive Crashed. NSA Won’t Send Me Their Backup Copy.: My computer hard drive crashed. NSA won’t send me their backup copy.
ReligiousThe Pope Is Busted: After getting all of Pope John Paul’s luggage loaded into the limo…
Bikes, Imagery, PostsHave You Seen This Post?: Have you seen this post? He didn’t.
Animals, Cars, Driving, Imagery, KoalasDon’t Worry I’m Koalafied To Drive: Don’t worry I’m Koalafied to drive.
Babies, Court, Imagery, Jail, Judges3 Years In Jail For Stealing My Nose: 3 years in jail for stealing my nose!
Beaches, Imagery, WomenBitches Be Trippin’: Bitches be trippin’
Cars, Computers, GeekyMicrosoft Car: Microsoft and General Motors on the Automobile.
Advertising, Food, Fountain, Imagery, Tomato Sauce, WoolworthsBuy Two & Receive A Free Fountain Face!: Buy two and receive a Free Fountain Face!
Animals, Australia, Birds, Dingoes, Dolphins, Fish, Galahs, Imagery, Kangaroos, Koalas, Kookaburras, Parrots, Penguins, Snakes, Toads, TurtlesAccurate Animal Names: Australian Edition: Accurate Animal Names: Australian Edition
Babies, Cars, Imagery, StickersBaby On Board: Baby on Board
New Zealand, RacistKiwi Air Disaster: New Zealand’s worst air disaster occurred earlier today…
Imagery, ScissorsI Run With Scissors: I run with scissors: It makes me feel dangerous.
☺News Headlines: Amusing news headlines
ImageryWhy Women Live Longer Than Men: Genetics - Why women live longer than men.
English, ImageryYou You Read The First Line Wrong?: What if I told you you read the first line wrong?
Advertising, Billboards, ImageryThere Are Two Rules For Success: There are two rules for success: Never reveal everything you know…
Dinosaurs, Imagery, MuseumsTrannysaurus: Trannysaurus: You’re fired.
Accidents, Cars, Imagery, TrucksThe Road To Success: On the road to success, there are no shortcuts…
Boobs, Elevators, Imagery, RisquéThis Morning, I Was Beaten Up By A Busy Woman In An Elevator: This morning, I was beaten up by a busy woman in an elevator. I was staring at her boobs when she said, “would you please press one?”. So I did. I don’t remember much after that.
America, English, Imagery, RacistEnglish (Traditional) And English (Simplified): English (Traditional) and English (Simplified).
Alcohol, Beer, Imagery, WineIn Wine There Is Truth: In Wine there is Truth. In Beer there is Strength. In Water there is Bacteria.
☺Disclaimer, Copyright & Contact Information: Feel free to send me anything you think might amuse me.
Animals, ImageryWireless Technology: “It is a bit freaky with this wireless technology”
Artists, Justin Bieber, MusiciansDear Justin Bieber Haters: I owe my life to Justin Bieber…
Animals, Geckos, Trumpets, TrustYou Know What Doesn’t Grow Back, Susan? Trust!: You know what doesn’t grow back, Susan? Trust!
Droids, Imagery, Star WarsLook, Sir. Droids!: These are not the droids you are looking for.
Chess, Feminists, Imagery, Sexist, WomenHow To Play Chess: How to Play Chess: Whites go first. The Queen must protect the King.
Imagery, Iphone, Nokia, PhonesNokia Versus The IPhone: The strongest phones ever!
Bananas, Fruit, ImageryAppealing Attire: I find this attire… appeeling.
Food, ImageryPeanut Delivery: Peanut Delivery…
Flash, ImageryVision Test: Vision Test.
Animals, Birds, Imagery, SeagullsSomebody Come Look At This: Somebody Come Look at This
America, Imagery, RacistAmerican Measures: American Measures: An Arbitrary Retarded Rollercoaster
Cars, ImageryFail Towing: Thank You for Using Fail Towing, Inc.
AudioPsychiatric Answering Machine: A Psychiatric Office Answering Machine.
Animals, Cats, ImageryCat Eats Watermelon: Cat eats watermelon
Imagery, Mistakes, PostersMake Some More Mistakes: I’ve learned so much from my mistakes… I’m thinking of making a few more.
Animals, Cats, Imagery, Snow, SnowballsThe Cat & The Snowball: The Cat & the Snowball.
Bugs Bunny, Cartoons, Daffy Duck, Donald Duck, Goofy, Imagery, Looney Tunes, Mickey Mouse, Porky Pig, Road Runner, Tom And Jerry, Wile E CoyoteJust To Make You Feel Really Old: Just to make you feel really old…
Money, SexistFemale Financial Planning: Women are so much better at financial planning than men.
Animals, Imagery, PigsBacon Seed: Bacon seed.
Imagery, PoliticalMad Magazine’s Boy Grows Up: The boy from Mad Magazine morphing into George Bush.
AudioTelstra Customer Service: An insight into the Telstra Customer Service Experience.
Imagery, SpidersSpider’s Remember: Remember when you threw a shoe at me and I fell somewhere behind the bed? I remember too.
ImageryWill Not Load Fully: This picture will not load fully!
Cars, Gardens, ImageryMajor Tom’s Ground Control: Major Tom’s Ground Control Lawn and Garden Management.
Children, Imagery, PaintChildren Painting: Two children, half a room and a TV covered in white paint.
Cartoons, Food, ImageryChocolate Pudding: It’s four o’clock in the morning. Why on earth are you making chocolate pudding?
Funerals, Imagery, Italian, RacistThe Italian Funeral: Pasquale died. His will provided ,000 for an elaborate funeral…
Canada, Imagery, NoticesCanadian Security: Canadian Security: It may seem rude but for security reasons please do not open the door to strangers.
Animals, Bugs, Flies, Imagery, Joke, MitesHey, Bug On My Back…: Hey, bug on my back, are you a mite? I mite be. Stupidest pun I ever heard…
Animals, Imagery, LlamaA Shaved Llama: A shaved Llama
Australia, Imagery, Logan, RacistAll Trades Logan: All Trades Logan.
ImageryProcrastination Issues: I’m taking care of my procrastination issues; just you wait and see.
Computers, GeekyMessage From Your IT Deptartment: Message from your IT Deptartment…
Bmw, Cars, Imagery, WorkBrand New BMW: The owner of the company where I work pulled up in his brand new BMW this morning…
Food, ImageryWurst Nightmare: Hi. I’m your wurst nightmare.
Animals, Bananas, Birds, Food, Imagery, ParrotsBanana Parrot Terrorism: A parrot eating bananas.
Alcohol, Imagery, Marriage, WineSecrets To A Long, Happy Marriage: An old woman was sipping on a glass of wine…
Germany, LoveTell Someone You Love Them Today: Tell someone you love them today, because life is short. But shout it at them in German, because life is also terrifying and confusing.
Animals, Cupcakes, Food, Imagery, LemursA Lemur Who Has Discovered The Wondrousness Of Cupcakes For The Fist Time.: A lemur who has discovered the wondrousness of cupcakes for the fist time.
Animated, Chris Coutts, Flash, Imagery, No Effort OnlineChris Coutts: No Effort Online: Chris Coutts: No Effort Online flash animations
☺Talking Clock: Why, that’s my Talking Clock…
Cars, Geeky, TechnologyCars And Computers: General Motors doesn’t have a help line for people who don’t know how to drive because people don’t buy cars like they buy computers, but imagine if they did…
Animals, DogsTalking Dog For Sale: A man sees a sign outside a house – “Talking Dog for Sale.”
Animals, Imagery, ZebrasI Love You Zebra: Bite marks are love notes written in flesh. I love you zebra.
Books, ImageryScary Campfire Stories: Book Style: And then… after they had ripped out half of her pages… they turned her… into a movie!
Australia, Coronavirus, Political, Politicians, Scott MorrisonConfirmed Case Of Corona: Hey babe, just thought you should know there’s a confirmed case of corona in our neighbourhood…
Imagery, SchoolUnprepared For An Exam: Ever gone into an exam having not studied at all?
Animals, Cats, Imagery, SmsCat Facts: Thanks for signing up for Cat Facts!
PoliticalMerry Christmas & A Happy New Year: Merry Christmas & A Happy New Year.
Facebook, ImageryI Think I Might Stay Home Tonight…: I think I might stay home tonight… Liver and Wallet like this.
WorkPhysical Fitness: This department requires no physical fitness program.
ImageryPositive For Coke: You’re fired Jack, the lab results just came back and you tested positive for Coke.
ReligiousCommon Belief: The belief that there was nothing…
Babies, ImageryNow Airtight: Now airtight… to prevent aging!
Accidents, Cars, Imagery, TargetMissed Target: Missed Target: So close…
Drawings, Imagery, SignsDraw Bridge: A man drawing a bridge at a “draw bridge” sign.
Cars, ImageryHome Mechanics: Home Mechanics and their cars.
Imagery, ToiletsWalked Into A Public Bathroom: Walked into a public bathroom. Saw this and heard “hello?”
Australia, Gillard, PoliticalPatriotic Retirement Plan: Ms Gillard’s Patriotic Retirement Plan.
Alcohol, Cooking, Imagery, WineCooking With Wine: I tried cooking supper with wine tonight. Didn’t go so well. After 5 glasses I forgot why I was even in the kitchen.
Imagery, Phones, Sms, SmsLost Phone: A man sends SMS from a lost phone…
Cars, Imagery, MosquitosA Mosquito With A Helmet: Mosquitos flying towards a car.
Animals, Cats, ImageryDid You Try Jumping Off The Refrigerator Too?: Did you try jumping off the refrigerator too?
Beer, SexistA Beer Before It Starts: A man came home from work, sat down in his favourite chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife, “Quick, bring me a beer before it starts”…
Balloons, Cars, ImageryMissile Balloons: Missile Balloons.
Drugs, ImageryToo High: Quick! Grab my hand! I… I can’t! You’re too high! What?
Boobs, Imagery, Sexist, WomenI Wish These Were Brains: Sexist, but contains breasts…
Cars, ImageryThe Park Anywhere Button: Self-explanatory really.
Mayans, PredictionsMayans Predicting The Future: Calm down… If the Mayans were good at predicting the future, there would still be Mayans.
Illusion, ImageryThey See Us Rollin’: They See Us Rollin’… We Aren’t…
Harry Potter, Imagery, SmsMaster Has Presented Dobby With Clothes! Dobby Is Free!: Well I’m grounded. WTF did you do this time? My Mum asked me to do the laundry and threw a sock at me… I ran away screaming “Master has presented Dobby with clothes! Dobby is free!”
Animated, Geeky, Imagery, PhotoshopAdobe Photoshop CS6 Has Stopped Working: The realest photography struggle ever…
RisquéSanta’s Stressful Christmas: Santa’s Stressful Christmas
Alice In Wonderland, Imagery, Movies, SexistUltimate Chick Flick: Ultimate chick flick: Two women fighting over a pair of shoes
Australia, Cars, Floods, Imagery, MechanicalDunno Mate, Maybe She’s Flooded?: Dunno mate, maybe she’s flooded?
Australia, Games, Imagery, MonopolyAustralian Monopoly: Australian Monopoly: St Marys to Penrith Special Edition.
Imagery, RacistHow To Be Black: How to be Black: An Instructional Book.
Geeky, Imagery, InternetSlashdot For Dummies: Slashdot for Dummies – A Reference for the Rest of Us!
SexistGirl’s And Boy’s Diaries: A girl and a boy and their diaries…
JokesToday Is Sunday: Attention! Today is Sunday. Share this on your Facebook wall. Within seven days you’ll get another Sunday…
Alcohol, Beer, Fitness, ImageryI Wonder What I Would Look Like With A Six Pack?: I wonder what I would look like with a six pack? Ahh, much better!
Animals, Imagery, ZebrasZebra Crossing: Zebra Crossing…
Food, Imagery, ThymeToo Much Thyme On My Hands: I’ve got way too much tyme on my hands.
Animals, Cows, Horses, ImageryThis Guy’s An Idiot! Quick, Take A Picture!: This guy’s an idiot! Quick, take a picture!
Parties, WatchesNot On My Watch: Lost my watch at a party once…
Cars, Imagery, Roads, SignsTired? Powernap Now.: Tired? Powernap now.
Animals, Irish, RacistIrish Pets: Two Irish men walk into a pet shop…
Atoms, Imagery, SignsDo Not Trust Atoms: Do not trust atoms. They make up everything.
Boobs, Bsod, Computers, Fashion, Geeky, Imagery, Microsoft, Sexist, Shirts, Windows, WomenI Love My BSOD: Perhaps the only blue screen of death geeks would be happy to see.
Cars, Imagery, TrucksDriver Is Fully Naked: Driver carries less than $50 cash and is fully naked.
Imagery, Men, SexistMen Have Feelings Too!: Men have feelings too! For example, we feel hungry.
Racist, RedneckA Redneck Love Poem: Susie Lee done fell in love…
Beds, Hotels, Imagery, Phones, SheetsAlways Leave Your Hotel Room Like This: Always leave your hotel room like this
Animals, Bears, Imagery, PenguinsDo One Brave Thing Today: Do one brave thing today… then run like hell!
Dogs, ImageryMy Dog Bailey Tried To Steal Stuff Out Of My Daughter’s Purse.: My dog Bailey tried to steal stuff out of my daughter’s purse. He got stuck and came over to me for help.
Africa, Animals, Imagery, Lions, SafarisShould I Tell Them I’m Here?: Should I tell them I’m here?
Animals, Imagery, TurtlesYou’ll Never Be As Happy As This Turtle: You’ll never be as happy as this turtle.
Animated, Chris Coutts, Flash, Imagery, No Effort OnlineChris Coutts: No Effort Online: Tales For The L33T: ROMEO+JULIET: Chris Coutts: No Effort Online flash animations
Animated, Imagery, MedicalRoot Canal: Amusing animated image of root canal treatment
Communist, Geeky, Imagery, Microsoft, SoftwareCommunist Traitor: It looks like you’re a Communist traitor…
Batman, Imagery, WomenNana Nana Nana Batman!: Nana Nana Nana Batman!
Animated, Chris Coutts, Flash, Imagery, No Effort OnlineChris Coutts: No Effort Online: There’s Something About Osmethne: Chris Coutts: No Effort Online flash animations
Animals, Animated, Australia, Emus, Imagery, KangaroosKangaroo Kicks Boy: A kangaroo kicks an unsuspecting boy into a dam while an emu strolls past.
Africa, Animals, Cats, Imagery, Lions, TouristsThe Best Photo Caption: A western woman in Africa—presumably a tourist—squats to go to the toilet in the bush, pants down, toilet paper in hand, her backpack in the grass nearby; unaware a lion is sneaking up behind her. Captioned “if she hasn’t… she will soon”.
AustraliaText Of A Letter From A Kid From Eromanga To Mum And Dad.: Text of a letter from a kid from Eromanga to Mum and Dad.
Babies, ImageryWomb Service: Hello, Womb Service? I’d like a double order of hot wings…
PhrasesWhen Someone Yells “STOP”…: When someone yells “STOP”, I never know if it’s in the name of love, it’s Hammertime, or I should collaborate and listen…
Animals, ImageryCat Legs: There really isn’t much else to say about this.
Computer Games, Education, Games, Imagery, Internet, Minecraft, School, TestsMinecraft: Create A Simple Door: Describe a process that could be used to create a simple door.
English, GrammarEnglish: Let’s face it - English is a crazy language.
Facebook, Imagery, NewspapersReal Life Facebook: I am trying to make friends outside of Facebook while applying the same principles…
Political, ReligiousThe 10 Commandments: The real reason that we can’t have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse or parliament…
☺How To Make Sure You’re A Normal Person: A quick and easy test to determine if you are a normal person…
Children, Dating, Imagery, Internet, RisquéLittle Kid Lover: I’m signing up for an online dating service. I just need to pick a username. “Little Kid Lover”, that way people will know where my priorities are at.
ImagerySense: …this picture makes none.
Imagery, Money, Monopoly, StrippersMonopoly Money For Fake Boobs: I think it’s only fair to throw monopoly money at strippers with fake boobs.
SexistMen Are Happier: Men are Happier: What do you expect from such simple creatures?
Advertising, Babies, Beer, Imagery, Mothers, VintageHow Mother And Baby “Picked Up”: Blatz Beer: How Mother and Baby “Picked Up”.
ImageryVegetative State: Vegetative State.
Dba, Geeky, Imagery, SqlDBA/SQL Humour: An SQL query walks into a bar, goes up to two tables and asks, “May I join you?”
Geeky, Imagery, RomanceRoses Are #FF0000: Roses are #FF0000, Violets are #0000FF.
Birds, Imagery, WifiHe’s Got Wifi: Three birds sitting on a wire, a fourth sitting in mid air. He's got wifi.
ImageryWhen You Thought You Ran Over An Animal: When you thought you ran over an animal but it was just a person
Imagery, RisquéAdult Dog Store: A dog carries an inflatable leg from an Adult Dog Store.
Balloons, Hot Air Balloons, ImageryHot Air Balloons: Hot Air Balloons - Boring 99% of the time.
Animals, ImageryWhat Animals Dream...: What animals dream.
Drugs, Imagery, Marijuana, SexistI Tried Pot Once. Now I’m Gay!: I tried pot once. Now I’m gay!
Imagery, RocksMy Pet Rock Ran Away: My Pet Rock Ran Away…
Imagery, Mafia, RecruitersRecruiters Are One Step Above The Mafia: Recruiters are one step above the Mafia…
Illusion, ImageryWhat Kind Of Sorcery Lets These Two Blocks Be The Same Color?: One is dark, one is light. One is gray, one is white. These are obviously two different blocks with two different colors right? Wrong. The two blocks are the same color.
Blonde, SexistA Young Brunette Goes To The Doctor...: A young brunette goes to the doctor…
Animals, Imagery, RaccoonsGet Well Soon: A raccoon lies dead on the road, holding a “get well soon” balloon.
Apple, Computers, Geeky, Linux, Mac, WindowsHow To Fix Any Computer: A comprehensive guide to fixing any computer.
Animated, Chris Coutts, Flash, Imagery, No Effort OnlineChris Coutts: No Effort Online: Tales For The L33T: PATR TOO: HAMLET: Chris Coutts: No Effort Online flash animations
English, GrammarThat’s What She Said: That’s what she said.
Imagery, Risqué, Tape Measures, ToolsBreakdown Of A Man’s Tape Measure Usage: Breakdown of a man’s tape measure usage
Animals, Dogs, ImageryA Dog Named Stay: I bought a dog once. Named him ‘Stay’…
Imagery, Toilets, VandalismToilet Vandalism: We buy things we don’t need with money we don’t have to impress people we don’t like…
Imagery, Metaphors, Star WarsMetaphors Be With You: Metaphors be with you
ImageryMarketing: Marketing…
Image, Qut, UniversityQUT: University For The Real World: Will we find intelligent life?
Hands, Imagery, Risqué, Valentine’s DayValentine Hand: Of course I’ll be your valentine. Let’s stay home and watch some porn.
Animals, Cats, Imagery, LionsA Cat With A Lion’s Mane Hat: A cat with a lion’s mane hat.
Imagery, Risqué, SexistInteresting ATM: Man using a sexually provocative ATM.
Horror MoviesIf You Are Lonely, Dim All Lights: If you are lonely, dim all lights and put on a horror movie. After a while it won’t feel like you’re alone anymore.
Animals, Beds, Dinosaurs, ImageryT-Rex Making A Bed: When you’re upset just imagine a T-Rex making a bed.
Animals, Australia, Dangerous, ImageryDangerous Australia: It’s no wonder we all live here…
Alcohol, ImageryAlcohol Research: Bum holding sign “Need Cash for Alcohol Research”.
Animals, Imagery, OttersOtter Nonsense: I’ve had it up to here with your otter nonsense…
Animals, Halloween, Imagery, SquirrelsHalloween Squirrel: A squirrel got its head stuck in a Halloween decoration and terrified a neighbourhood…
Babies, Imagery, PregnancyPregnancy Tips: Some useful pregnancy tips…
Food, Geeky, ImageryLOL For Lunch: Ordering linguini for lunch always boosts morale.
MedicalSeek And Find You…: I shall seek and find you…
Imagery, RisquéFlower Porn: Even flowers do it…
Advertising, Boobs, Imagery, Sexist, VintageSabrina Projects: Sabrina demonstrates the world’s finest projection equipment…
America, Australia, Birds, Horror Movies, Imagery, MagpiesAustralian Horror Story: American Horror Story versus Australian Horror Story
Imagery, Joke, Mayans, PredictionsMayan Joke Set-Up: Heh… I’ve just thought of a joke with the longest set-up ever! Cool! I’ll fetch a scribe…
Cpr, First Aid, Imagery, SchoolCPR Diagram: You’re next!
Cartoons, Fire, Imagery, StairsIn Case Of Fire, Take Stairs: In case of fire, take stairs.
Geeky, ImageryOhm: …ohm.
Africa, Animals, ImageryRhino Painting: A rhinoceros painting…
ImageryHoliday House: The Holiday House
Imagery, PiracyPiracy Is Not Theft: Imagine your car gets stolen, but it’s still there in the morning.
Books, Imagery, PhobiasEverything You Wanted To Know About Phobias: Everything you wanted to know about Phobias (but were afraid to ask)
Alcohol, Imagery, Irish, RacistIrish Yoga: Irish Yoga.
Imagery, RisquéPremature Ejaculators Anonymous: Man stating he ‘came too soon’ in front of sign stating ‘premature ejaculators anonymous’.
Computer Games, Geeky, Imagery90’s Gamer: Everytime I hear people complain about online gaming, I wish they could experience my pain of online gaming in the 90’s…
Animals, Birds, Imagery, Owls, RegretsRegrets: I stay up late every night, and realise it’s a bad idea every morning.
Guns, ImageryCrayon Gun: A fantastic gun made from many every-day items.
InternetMoronic Email Scam: Nigerian spam…
RisquéTarzan Sex: When Jane initially met Tarzan of the Jungle, she was attracted to him, and during her questions about his life, she asked him how he had sex…
Bipolar, Graffiti, Imagery, SignsBipolar Awesome: I hate being bi-polar. It’s awesome.
Imagery, PoliticalWill Be President For Food: Boy sitting next to sign “No Campaigning beyond This Point” holding sign “Will Be President for Food”.
Risqué, Sexist, WorkSentence Structure: Why Sentence Structure Is Important: Sentence Structure: Why sentence structure is important.
Imagery, Marriage, Men, WomenMarriage Secrets Of Highly Successful Couples: Marriage secrets of highly successful couples.
Children, Imagery, ParentingAn Angry Child: If she doesn’t put me down in about two seconds, I will be forced to use my fist!
Boobs, Imagery, RisquéWater Enhanced Breasts: Water Enhanced Breasts…
English, GrammarIf Your A Grammar Nazi: If your a grammar nazi and your reading this your gonna have a bad time.
Advertising, Feminine Hygiene, Imagery, Sexist, VintagePlease, Dave… Please Don’t Let Me Be Locked Out From You!: Please, Dave… please don’t let me be locked out from you! For complete feminine hygiene rely on Lysol – a concentrated germ-killer!
Imagery, Kim Jong-un, North Korea, SnickersKim, Eat A Snickers: Kim Jong-un: I’m going to nuke everyone. Kim, eat a Snickers. Kim: Why? Because you turn into a war mongler when you’re hungry. Better? Kim: Better.
Balloons, Birthdays, ImageryBalloons Are So Weird…: Balloons are so weird… “Happy Birthday, here’s a plastic sack of my breath”
Irish, Racist, ReligiousAn Irish Daughter Had Not Been To Her Parent's House For Over Five Years...: An Irish daughter had not been to her parent’s house for over five years…
Animated, Chris Coutts, Flash, Imagery, No Effort OnlineChris Coutts: No Effort Online: What Does Suxor Mean 2: Chris Coutts: No Effort Online flash animations
Australia, Iraq, PoliticalThe Australian Constitution: For Iraq: They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq…
Imagery, Livestream, Nature, TechnologyLive Stream: Can I call you back? I’m watching a live stream…
Game Shows, TvAmusing Hollywood Squares Answers: Amusing Hollywood Squares Answers.
Australia, Imagery, Julia Gillard, Kevin Rudd, PoliticalWhere Was I Before I Was So Rudely Interrupted?: [Kevin Rudd] Where was I before I was so rudely interrupted?
Alphabet, Games, ImageryAlphabet Game: The Alphabet Game is a car game played to amuse travellers on long car rides.
Bananas, Food, Imagery, PhonesBanana Phone: It’s a banana phone…
Animals, Cars, Children, Girls, Horses, ImageryNo Pony For Christmas: No pony for Christmas? No window for driving!
Animals, Imagery, RisquéOld Style Birth Control: Old Style Birth Control.
Boobs, Imagery, Risqué, SexistDream Girl: Girl on beach with six breasts.
Animals, Bread, Dogs, Food, ImageryI’m Inbred!: I’m Inbred!
Illusion, ImageryIllogical Lego: Illogical Lego.
Coffee, Hipsters, Imagery, SignsHow Did The Hipster Burn His Tongue?: How did the hipster burn his tongue? He sipped on his coffee before it was cool.
Australia, History, RacistA Brief History Of Australia: Australia was founded in 1901 by Jimmy “Crocodile” Austral, a deportee of England who was banished for cannibalism, having eaten 32 members of the House of Lords. In accordance with English colonial law, this entitled him to an entire already-inhabited continent.
Animals, Cats, Geeky, ImagerySchrödinger’s Cat: Wanted: Dead & Alive…
Animals, Cats, DogsCats And Dogs: As seen in a dog’s diary…
Animals, Food, ImageryBoiled Lobster: “I hate the way they scream when you boil them!”
JokeLaurel And Hardy: Laurel and Hardy were repairing their roof. All of a sudden, Hardy lost his balance and went tumbling on the ground…
Daughters, Families, Imagery, MothersMum, What’s It Like To Have The Greatest Daughter In The World?: Mum, what’s it like to have the greatest daughter in the world? I don’t know dear… you’ll have to ask grandma.
Animals, Elephants, Imagery, Kenya, ZoosMan & Elephant: In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Louisiana State University…
Imagery, ShipsA Ship Shipping Ship Shipping Shipping Ships.: A ship shipping ship shipping shipping ships.
Animals, Cats, ImageryPlease Don’t Let The Cat Out. No Matter What It Tells You!: Please don’t let the cat out. No matter what it tells you!
Imagery, SexistEscape From The Kitchen: You thought you could escape from the kitchen didn’t you?
Children, Imagery, Sexist, ToysTo Avoid Perpetuating Gender Stereotypes: To avoid perpetuating gender stereotypes, I gave my daughter a mix of dolls and toy cars to play with. This is what happened…
Computers, Geeky, ImageryWhenever I Have To Force Shutdown: Whenever I have to force shutdown.
Animals, Boobs, Bras, Cats, ImageryBooby Trap: Nooo! It’s a booby trap!
Imagery, Jobs, WorkThings Don’t Really Change: Interviewer: What would you consider to be your greatest weakness?
Cars, SexistHow To Change Your Oil: How to Change your Oil: A guide for men & women…
Australia, Cooking, God, Imagery, KitchensIn God’s Kitchen: In God’s Kitchen: What are you cooking?
Imagery, Phones, SmsI Am Hungary: I am Hungary…
Hunger Games, Imagery, Katniss Everdeen, Kristen Stewart, Movies, Movie Stars, Smiling, TwilightKristen Stewart Smiles: I don’t always smile, but when I do, I don’t.
Imagery, Movie Posters, PiranhasPiranhas On An Escalator: If I were you, I’d take the stairs…
Bananas, Food, Imagery, SausagesBanana Sausage: Banana sausage…
☺Comments & Other Similar Social Data: Comments, Facebook Open Graph, & Other Similar Social Data.
SexistPerfect Riddle: Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met…
Fonts, Imagery, Running, Sport, Usain BoltUsain Bold, Usain Italic: Usain Bolt: Usain Bold, Usain Italic.
Computers, Geeky, ItStar Trek TNG Meets Microsoft: Star Trek TNG Meets Microsoft…
Imagery, WifiWireless Networks: Wireless networks could save your life!
SexistA Love Story With A Happy Ending: Once upon a time, a bloke asked a girl “Will you marry me?”
JokeExercise - Some Facts: Exercise… some facts.
Birds, Imagery, RavensWhere Have You Been All Weekend?: Where have you been all weekend? Out Raven.
ImageryFight Apathy: …or don’t.
All Your Base, Geeky, Imagery, InternetAll Your Base...: All your base are belong to us.
Animals, Birds, Imagery, Notices, Parrots, SignsParrot BBQ: Parrot Lost: Parrot BBQ!
Imagery, SexistWoman With PMS: Woman with PMS.
Imagery, PhonesJester App: Sorry–you've been replaced by an app…
Flash, ImagerySteady Hand – A Game Of Skill: A game of skill, requiring a steady hand and keen eye – make sure you play at least the first two levels…
ImageryI See Dumb People: I see dumb people… They are everywhere!
Illusion, ImageryThe Angry/Calm Illusion: The Angry/Calm Illusion.
Imagery, RisquéSave Paper: Save paper…
JokesComplimentary Pretzels: A guy walks into a bar and takes a seat. Before he can order a beer, the bowl of pretzels in front of him says “Hey, you’re a handsome fellow.”
Cars, ImagerySideways Car: It’s a little confusing…
Geeky, ImageryCaps Lock: A visual representation of the use of caps lock.
Geeky, JokesIntellectual Jokes: Believing this statement will make you happier.
Batman, Imagery, Superman, WonderwomanIt Is Such A Drag When Someone In The Group Can’t Fly…: It is such a drag when someone in the group can’t fly… forcing everybody else to have to ride up the elevator too…
Imagery, Monday, Punch, WorkThe Monday Punch: The Monday Punch: A man punched in the face.
Accidents, Cars, ImageryPass With Care: Pass with care…
Animals, Dogs, ImageryDog Queue: Sometimes, even dogs have to queue…
Beaches, Imagery, Irish, SunbathingIrish Girl Sunbathing: An Irish girl sunbathes…
Imagery, Injuries, Sexist, SportMen & Women In Sport: Women: No problem girls… I can go on. Men: Ahhhh! I’m dying.
Fortune Cookies, ImageryYou Are Not Illiterate.: You are not illiterate.
Flies, Ipad, NewspapersModern Newspapers: I was visiting my daughter last night when I asked if I could borrow a newspaper…
Mayans, Movies, Predictions, The Hobbit, TolkienMayans Predicting The Hobbit Movie: Keep calm. The Mayans were simply counting down to The Hobbit movie.
Animals, Dogs, ImageryFree Puppy: Free puppy…
Imagery, Lord Of The Rings, Sauron, Traffic LightsKneel, Says The Demon Light: Stop says the red light, go says the green. Wait says the yellow light, twinkling in between. Kneel, says the demon light, with its eye of coal. Sauron knows your licence plate, and stares into your soul.
Imagery, JokeHow Many Alzheimer’s Patients Does It Take?: To get to the other side!
Imagery, SportHandegg: Football versus Handegg: It’s not football…
Imagery, Toilet PaperToilet Paper: A piece of toilet paper saving another piece…
Accidents, Buses, Cars, Imagery, InsuranceDon’t You Suggest To Me What To Do: If you don’t have GIO Third Party Property Insurance, we suggest you don’t hit this bus.
Animals, Cats, Ducks, Imagery, SeagullsCat Duck: The Amazing Cat Duck! Or perhaps Cat Seagull?
Australia, Chairs, Disaster, Earthquake, Imagery, MelbourneThe 2012 Melbourne Earthquake: The 2012 Melbourne Earthquake: We will rebuild.
Beer, Computers, GeekyIf Beer Was Like Operating Systems...: If Beer was like Operating Systems…
Advertising, Gay, Imagery, Showers, VintageBradley Group Showers: Bradley Group Showers.
Apple, Computers, Flash, Geeky, Imagery, MacMacintosh: Mac Hater…
Bread, Food, Imagery, TonguesPlease Use Tongue.: Do not touch bread with hands. Please use tongue.
Animated, Chris Coutts, Flash, Imagery, No Effort OnlineChris Coutts: No Effort Online: Ugly Whore: Chris Coutts: No Effort Online flash animations
Imagery, Shirts, TshirtsAttention Deficit Disorder: Ask me about my attention deficit disorder or pie or my cat. A dog. I have a bike. Do you like TV? I saw a rock. Hi.
Apple, Boobs, Fashion, Imagery, Ios, Risqué, ShirtsSlide To Unlock: A woman wearing a shirt: Slide to Unlock.
Imagery, LoveThis Summarises My Love Life: This summarises my love life. I’m the guy in blue…
Imagery, SocksThe Divorce Rate Among My Socks Is Astonishing.: The divorce rate among my socks is astonishing.
Children, Parenting, SchoolLetter To A Mother / School Report: It is with great happiness that I’m telling you that I eloped with my new boyfriend…
France, Imagery, North Korea, RacistFrance Surrenders To North Korea: France surrenders to North Korea
Browsers, Firefox, Geeky, Imagery, Internet, WindowsFirefox Has Encountered…: …an unexpected problem with Windows.
Imagery, Risqué, SexSex Tape: I made a sex tape. Shhh!
Geeky, InternetDiary Of An AOL Luser: Diary of an AOL Luser.
PilotsBlind Pilots: You know, Bob, one of these days, they’re going to scream too late, and we’re all gonna die…
Imagery, InternetProcrastination: Have a little look at the Internet…
Babies, Imagery, Kanye West, Kim Kardashian, Phones, Sms, Taylor Swift, TwitterYo I’m Happy For You And Imma Let You Finish But…: [Twitter] Taylor Swift: @KimKardashian @kanyewest Yo I’m happy for you and imma let you finish but Beyonce had one of the best labours of all time.
Imagery, RacistHas One Night Stand: Has one night stand, but way too many books to fit on it.
Animals, Gorillas, Imagery, King Kong, Mobiles, Phones, VodafoneNo Signal: The “Vodafone Effect”.
America, Democracy, Imagery, TvWelcome To The USA: The Government where the money’s made up and the debt doesn’t matter.
Imagery, Memory, Protests, RalliesBetter Memory: What do we want? Better memory! When do we want it? Want what?
Cars, Imagery, Irish, RacistIrish Car: An advertisement in an Irish Newspaper…
Animals, Imagery, Internet, RabbitsStop Surfing The Internet And Just Go To Bed: Holy crap! Look how late it is! Why do I always do this? Why is it so hard to stop surfing the internet and just go to bed?
Autocorrect, Imagery, Iphone, SmsBroken Penis: I broke my penis and it exploded all over my pants.
Children, Families, Imagery, Parenting, SchoolWhen I Grow Up… I Want To Be Like Mommy!: I wish to clarify that I am not now, nor have I ever been, an exotic dancer…
Computers, GeekyUnix Commands: Amusing UNIX commands.
Animals, Golf, Imagery, Sport, TurtlesWorld’s Largest Golf Ball: World’s largest golf ball. Gigantic turtle for scale.
Imagery, Numbers, Star WarsWhy Was Five Afraid Of Seven?: Why was Five afraid of Seven? Because Six Seven Eight.
Eggs, ImageryEscape Egg: Counting down the days to escape…
SexistAustralia And Mateship: Mateship amongst Men & Women: The differences…
Animals, Cats, Glasses, ImageryBut These Are For Girls: But these are for girls… Holy Crap! I look fabulous!
Imagery, PhonesPhone Tails: That’s right dear, our ancestors had tails.
Coronavirus, Gynaecology, ImageryVisiting Your Gynaecologist During Coronavirus: Visiting your Gynaecologist during Coronavirus
Coffee, Religious, SexistMorning Coffee: A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning…
Imagery, Movies, Obi-wan Kenobi, Star Wars, Terrorism, World Trade CentreThese Blast Points… Too Accurate For Sand People: Obi-Wan Kenobi in front of burning World Trade Centre towers: “These blast points… too accurate for sand people”.
Cars, Imagery, PetrolThe Bank Account Gas Ratio: The depressing ratio between your bank account, and your gas tank.
Coronavirus, Imagery, Video Conferencing, Work, ZoomCoronavirus Zoom Conference: Zoom Conference: Can everyone hear me?
Imagery, Political, Snowden, Spying, WikileaksEdward Snowden Buys A Plane Ticket From Moscow To Havana…: Snowden buys a plane ticket from Moscow to Havana. Over 30 journalists pay last-minute airfare for a ticket on the same flight. The doors shut, the plane takes off, and [Edward] Snowden is not on the plane. It’s a 16-hour flight.
Geeky, ImageryReach Out: Reach Out!
ImageryAll Images: All Images
ImageryElephant Bone: …just to confuse future archaeologists.
Imagery, Motorbikes, SportOh Look, A Penny: Oh look, a penny!
Imagery, MoviesTitanic Ice Bucket Challenge: Titanic ALS Ice Bucket Challenge: “I accept your ice water challenge”.
Beer, Imagery, Logan, Prams, Racist, Victoria BitterLogan Priorities: Logan Priorities.
Comedians, Comedy, Grammar, Hitler, Imagery, JapanOne Thing Led To Another: I hate when you’re reading something and you come across the phrase “one thing led to another”
DrugsGranny LSD: Boy asks his Granny, “Have you seen my pills labelled ‘LSD’?”
SexistCIA Assassin: The CIA had an opening for an assassin…
PoliticalPolitically Correct Primer: A politically correct primer.
Advertising, Cooking, Imagery, Sexist, VintageCook – That’s What Wives Are For!: The Chef does everything but cook – that’s what wives are for!
Cartoons, Comics, Imagery, MoviesThe Bat Cave: The location of our Bat Cave is meant to be secret, so stop checking in!
Mechanics, UnderwearAlways Wear Underwear: Always wear underwear in public, especially when working under your vehicle…
Geeky, ImageryIPad Stone: iPad versus a stone.
Guns, Imagery, ToastToast Toasts Toast?: If guns don’t kill people, people kill people, does that mean…
Facebook, Imagery, TattoosTough Tattoos: Tough Tattoos: You Don’t Have to Like Me.
America, RacistAmerican State Mottos: American State Mottos…
Animals, Imagery, OctopusesDrunk Octopus Wants To Fight: Drunk Octopus Wants to Fight…
Cars, Imagery, Italy, Racist, Risqué25 Year Old Escort: But Mr. Berlusconi, you said, “Send a 25 years old escort to my villa!”
Animals, Bunnies, Chocolate, Easter, Food, Imagery, RabbitsEaster Bunnies: Chocolate Easter Bunnies: My butt hurts! What?
Animals, ImageryGeneral Hierarchical Management Structure: I’ve never seen a Flow Chart described so clearly.
Agony Aunt, Cheating, Clinton, Dear Abby, Dear Abby, Political, RelationshipsDear Abby, My Husband Is A Liar And A Cheat…: My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on me from the beginning, and, when I confront him, he denies everything…
Illusion, ImageryMoving Illusion: A psychedelic illusion where a brightly coloured non-moving image appears to be pulsating in and out.
Blonde, Fruit, Ginger, Hair, Imagery, Strawberries, WomenGinger Versus Strawberry Blonde: This is a strawberry. This is ginger…
English, VegetablesThe Correct Way To Spell Potato: The correct way to spell potato is “GHOUGHPHTHEIGHTTEEAU”.
Internet, RisquéCybersex How-Not-To: Cybersex how it should not be…
Apple, Imagery, Ios, PatentsOlden Day Slide To Unlock: Slide to unlock: Apple patent #1964022.
Geeky, Imagery, Internet, Pie ChartsTime Breakdown Of Modern Web Design: The breakdown of modern web design.
Geeky, InternetCannot Find The Damn File: Cannot find the damn file…
Food, ImageryI Love The Smell Of Pixel In The Morning: I Love the Smell of Pixel in the Morning…
Imagery, Winnie The PoohPooh Everywhere: Watch your step, there’s pooh everywhere!
Buses, ImageryGo Home Bus, You’re Drunk!: Go home bus, you’re drunk!
SexistSocialize: Men socialize by insulting each other…
CarsMini Cooper: A guy driving a Mini Cooper pulls up at a stoplight next to a Rolls-Royce…
Imagery, Israeli, Palestinian, Political, RacistIsraeli Settlers: Of course we want peace–this piece and this piece and this piece and this piece…
Imagery, MathSeven Ate Nine: Six, Seven, Ate, Nine…
Ballerinas, Imagery, WomenFreshly Washed Ballerinas: Freshly washed ballerinas.
Religious, Risqué, WorkCorporate Lessons: Corporate lessons.
GrammarI. Like. It. How. When. You. Read. This. The. Little. Voice. In. Your. Head. Takes. Pauses.: I. Like. It. How. When. You. Read. This. The. Little. Voice. In. Your. Head. Takes. Pauses.
April Fools, Imagery, Pizza, Salad, WorkThis Is How Workplace Violence Starts: This is how workplace violence starts…
Children, ParentingWhy Parents Drink: Why parents drink.
Girls, Imagery, WorkForgot I Was Sharing My Screen With Her: I was on an online conference call with a cute sounding girl, and googled her name out of curiosity. Forgot I was sharing my screen with her.
Apple, Computers, Imagery, Phones, Religious, Steve JobsI Have An APP For That!: Steve Jobs, 1955 – 2011.
ImageryCute Party Trick: Man with finger up nose and out of eye.
Illusion, ImageryHinton’s “Lilac Chaser”: The Dotty Illusion…
Computer Games, ImageryVideo Games Ruined My Life: Video games ruined my life. Good thing I have two more.
Animals, Animated, Bananas, Cats, ImageryCat & Banana: The cat and the banana.
Fonts, Imagery, TypographyBe Bold: Be bold or italic. Never regular.
Epilepsy, Imagery, PostersSeize The Day: Seize The Day: Sign up for the Epilepsy Awareness Walk.
Australia, Bbq, Cooking, Food, SexistBarbecue Etiquette: Aussie Barbecue Season.
Animals, Cats, ImageryAbercrombie & Cat: Abercrombie & Cat
Blonde, SexistBlonde Betting: A very attractive blonde woman arrived at a Vegas casino…
Capitalism, Imagery, PoliticalSuffering From Capitalism: Feeling sad and depressed? Are you anxious? Worried about the future? Feeling isolated and alone? You might be suffering from Capitalism.
Animals, Imagery, Lightbulbs, Mice, Risqué, SexHow Many Mice Does It Take To Screw In A Lightbulb?: How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Imagery, MedicalHearing Aids: Hearing aids…
Grammar, Imagery, TomorrowTomorrow (noun): Tomorrow (noun): a mystical land where 99% of all human productivity, motivation and achievement is stored.
InvisibleYou Can See Me?: Next time a stranger talks to me when I’m alone I will look at them shocked and just whisper quietly, “you can see me?”
Imagery, TurtlesA Wee Turtle: A wee turtle…
Imagery, Movies, PiratesHorny Pirate’s Worst Nightmare: What’s a horny pirate’s worst nightmare?
Boobs, Cars, Imagery, Risqué, SexistShe Might Scratch The Paint: I know what you’re thinking… she might scratch the paint.
Dalai Lama, Daleks, Dr Who, Imagery, Reincarnation, TvDalek Lama: Reincarnate! Reincarnate!
Boats, Burials, Cemetries, Funerals, Imagery, SexistBoat Funeral: A funeral procession pulled into a cemetery. Several carloads of family members followed a black truck towing a boat with a coffin in it…
Imagery, Nigerians, Racist, ScamsRich Nigerians: Nigerian man dies and authorities find billion in his apartment…
Imagery, RacistYou Must Be A Racist: Oh, you were expecting a white guy?
ImageryLegoland Will Never Be The Same...: Legoland will never be the same…
Board Games, Imagery, SexistWomen’s Monopoly: By a man…
Imagery, Jobs, WorkHonesty: Your Greatest Weakness: Interviewer: What would you consider to be your greatest weakness?
Redheads, SexistRedheads: How do you get a redhead…
Fire, ImageryFire Distinguisher: Fire Distinguisher: Yep, that’s fire…
Animals, Computer Games, Games, Imagery, PhonesAngry Birds: Angry Birds attend Anger Management.
Imagery, Notices, Paper, SignsPaper Says Yes: Would you like a little piece of paper that says yes to hang onto during the tough times ahead? (Maybe it will help)
Aeroplanes, Buses, Cars, Electricity, Firefighters, Imagery, VaccinesRe-Think Vaccines: Next time someone tells you to re-think vaccines, show them this.
Babies, Drinking, Imagery, Studying, The RockWhat Are Your Plans For The Weekend?: What are your plans for the weekend? Studying. [shocked look] Drinking! Drinking!
Imagery, Movies, RomanceGirlfriends: Harry Potter Versus Twilight: Ginny: When Harry broke up with me for my safety…
ImageryTrapped Miners: The first photo of the trapped miners…
RisquéTemptation: Temptation, by a soon to be married man.
England, Imagery, UkAnarchy In The UK: Would you like some tea?
Imagery, Steve IrwinDoesn’t Protect From Harmful Rays: Puts on sunblock. Doesn’t protect from harmful rays.
Animals, Flamingos, ImageryGarden Flamingo: Garden Flamingo…
Australia, Imagery, Nrl, Nsw, Qld, Rugby, SportNSW Playing Economically: 2 Punches Per Gallen.: NSW playing economically. 2 punches per Gallen.
Animals, Cats, Egyptians, Hieroglyphics, ImageryAncient Egyptians: Posting Cats To Their Walls Since 3150 BC: Ancient Egyptians: Posting cats to their walls since 3150 BC
Animals, Animated, ImageryLesson Of The Day: You should never do anything wrong, it will catch up with you…
Animals, Boobs, Imagery, SlothsLook At This Boob: Look at this boob. This is a nice boob.
☺The Fellowship Of The Ring: The Fellowship of the Ring.
Animals, Chocolate, Easter, Easter Bunnies, Imagery, RabbitsJust Some Bunny That I Used To Know: Now you’re just some bunny that I used to know.
Africa, Bus, ImageryDo You Ever Get So Angry…: Do you ever get so angry… you throw a VCR at a burning bus?
Australia, PoliticalPsalm 2009 – 2012: The First Book of Government.
Animals, ImageryFalling Cows: A roadsign showing a cow falling off a cliff and onto a car.
Comics, English, ImageryThe Accidental Conversation Loop: My greatest social fear: The Accidental Conversation Loop.
Computer Games, Geeky, Imagery, TechnologyCombo Hit: Streetfighter Style: Combo Hit: Streetfighter Style
Aboriginal, Australia, RacistAboriginal Spongebob Spotted In Cairns: Aboriginal Spongebob spotted in Cairns.
Animated, Chris Coutts, Flash, Imagery, No Effort OnlineChris Coutts: No Effort Online: What Does Suxor Mean?: Chris Coutts: No Effort Online flash animations
Australia, SexistAussie Men: Aussie men… struggling with the booze…
Art, Imagery, RenaissanceYou Weren’t Even Listening Just Now, Were You?: You weren’t even listening just now, were you? What a weird way to start a conversation.
Cyclones, Imagery, SupermarketsCyclone Magic Trick: Wanna see a magic trick?
Animals, Imagery, SharksFlying Sharks: Flying sharks… we’re screwed.
Imagery, SexistHusband Glasses: I’m returning these glasses I bought for my husband. He’s still not seeing things my way.
Jewish, RacistBacon Tree: Back in cowboy times, a westbound wagon train was lost and low on food…
ImagerySmile: Smile…
Imagery, Logan, Racist, RisquéIn Logan: Meanwhile… in Logan…
Drugs, Homophobia, Imagery, Marijuana, MedicalMedical Marijuana: What disease is your medical marijuana relieving?
Apple, Computers, Decals, Imagery, Laptops, Mac, Macbook, Stickers, TechnologyCreative Apple MacBook Stickers: A collection of creative Apple MacBook stickers & decals.
Animals, Cats, Dogs, ImageryJust Being A Cat: Dog attacks person. Put dog to sleep. Cat attacks person. LOL, jus’ bein’ a cat.
Geeky, ImageryBlackboard: School kid writing Code on blackboard as punishment.
Babies, ImageryResisting A Rest: If I refuse to nap… is that resisting a rest?
Advertising, Imagery, Skype, VintageSkype: Vintage Skype advert.
Babies, ImagerySpot The Baby: Spot the baby. No, the other one.
Bikes, Brisbane, Citycycle, Imagery, UnicyclesFrom The Minds Who Brought You CityCycle — UniCycle.: From the minds who brought you CityCycle — UniCycle. Brisbane’s brightest idea yet.
Imagery, RisquéDon’t Fall For This: The CIA is trying to steal my…
Animals, Bears, Cartoons, Imagery, PigsJackass Piglet: Hi, my name’s piglet and this is Jackass.
Sexist, WomenWhen A Woman Says “what?”: When a woman says “what?”, it’s not because she didn’t hear you. She’s giving you a chance to change what you said.
Dating, Imagery, Relationships, SexistAnd Then I Said: And Then I Said… The Differences Between Boys & Girls.
Beer, Imagery, SexistYou Never Listen To Me…: You never listen to me! You only hear what you want to hear!
Books, Imagery, Lance Armstrong, LibrariesLance Armstrong Fiction Books: All non-fiction Lance Armstrong books including “Lance Armstrong: Images of a Champion”, “The Lance Armstrong Peprformance Program” and “Lance Armstrong: World’s Greatest Champion” will soon be moved to the fiction section.
Imagery, SignsAlways Give 100%: Whatever you do always give 100%. Unless you’re donating blood.
America, Imagery, Obama, PoliticalBarack Obama: What I Actually Do: Barack Obama: What I actually do.
Australia, Football, Imagery, Muslim, Racist, SportWell, I Guess We’ll Beheading Home Now: Well, I guess we’ll beheading home now…
Dates, ImageryMay The 4th Be With You: If today is “May the 4th be with you” does that mean tomorrow is “revenge of the 5th?”
Imagery, RocksOrders From A Rock: [On a rock] Turn me over. You just took orders from a rock.
Animals, Imagery, Johnny Depp, Movie Stars, SpidersI’m Really Afraid Of Johnny Depp: Research shows that if you’re afraid of spiders, you’re more likely to find one in your bedroom. I’m really afraid of Johnny Depp.
Apple, Bill Gates, Computers, Heaven, Imagery, Microsoft, Phones, Religious, Steve Jobs, WindowsSteve Jobs & Bill Gates Discuss Heaven: Steve Jobs & Bill Gates Discuss Heaven: It doesn’t have any wall or fence…
Corporate, Geeky, ImageryPatent Infringement: Eating Fruit…
Books, Imagery, Racist, ShopsWong Fook Hing Book Store: If you cannot find the book that you are looking for, then you’re obviously in the… Wong Fook Hing Book Store!
Illusion, ImageryAfterburn - Whom Do You See?: Relax and concentrate on the four small dots in the middle of the picture…
Imagery, TattoosFree Tattoo Removal: Free (and perhaps painful) tattoo removal.
Africa, Apple, Imagery, Ipad, StarvingThinner Than Ever: Thinner than ever.
Animals, Cats, Dogs, ImageryAnimals That Didn’t Expect Their Humans To Come Home So Early!: Animals that didn’t expect their humans to come home so early!
America, RacistA Russian Arrives In New York: A Russian arrives in New York City as a new immigrant to the United States…
Homeless, SexistSledgehammer Psychology: A business man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner…
Imagery, Marriage, Onions, People, ProposingProposing With An Onion: Proposing with an onion: Guaranteed to cry.
Animals, Dogs, ImagerySo We Got Pugsy A New Chew Toy…: So we got Pugsy a new chew toy…
Android, Galaxy Note, Imagery, Phones, Samsung, TechnologyBattery Fully Charged. Unplug Charger.: In what is perhaps one of the more stupid “features” on my Samsung Galaxy Note, when it reaches full charge, it lights up its screen and pops up and audible alert saying “Battery fully charged. Unplug charger.” As I charge my phone at night, it is effectively an extremely annoying unwanted wake-up call.
Advertising, Babies, ImageryGood Things Are Twice As Good In Cellophane: Good things are twice as good in Cellophane!
Imagery, ToiletsPeeing: Expert Mode: Peeing: Expert Mode
Animals, Birds, Imagery, Missing Posters, Paper, Pigeons, PostersHave You Seen This Bird?: I met this bird by the tree near the library. We chilled for like, 5 minutes, & then without any warning he just flew away. We really hit it off. So if you see him, please let him know I miss him.
Homework, Imagery, SchoolSelf Referencing Homework: What has been your greatest accomplishment so far?
GeekyHuman Hotfix: Hotfix Patch for Humans released.
Bananas, Carving, Food, Guns, Imagery, WeaponsBanana Gun: Banana gun…
Facebook, Imagery, Sexist, Sport, VolleyballLadies Beach Volleyball: Just been watching Ladies Beach Volleyball, and there’s already been a wrist injury… but I should be OK by Friday.
Alligators, Animals, Crocodiles, ImageryHow To Tell Alligators And Crocodiles Apart: It’s not that difficult to tell alligators and crocodiles apart…
Duct Tape, Imagery, WorkEmergency Bridge Repair Team: Duct Tape: Good for anything.
Cars, Imagery, RacingTimes Were Tough Before The GoPro: Times were tough before the GoPro…
Animals, Animated, Giraffes, ImageryHidden Giraffe: If you stare at this picture long enough you should be able to see a giraffe…
Animals, Cats, Cockroaches, Dogs, Imagery, Men, WomenThe Circle Of Life: The Circle of Life: Who is afraid of who?
Computer Games, Geeky, ImageryReality: Worst game ever.
Animals, Giraffes, Imagery, SpidersGiraffe Spider: A giraffe spots a spider…
Geeky, Imagery, Movies, Star WarsStar Wars: A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away…
RisquéMonica: Monica walks into her dry cleaning store…
Africa, Imagery, RacistEvery 60 Seconds In Africa: Every 60 seconds in Africa… a minute passes.
Animals, Business, Dogs, ImageryAssistant Branch Manager: The Branch Manager and the Assistant Branch Manager.
Cats, Comics, ImageryPop Out Of Bed: If people were meant to pop out of bed we’d all sleep in toasters.
Food, Imagery, PizzaI Just Burned 1500 Calories In About Five Minutes: I just burned 1500 calories in about five minutes. I forgot the pizza was in the oven.
Bikes, Geeky, It, SexistAn IT Student Is Walking Along With His Bike…: An IT student is walking along with his bike…
Imagery, UniversityUniversity Website: Things on the front page of a university website.
☺100 Guidelines On Becoming An Evil Villain: World domination is everyone’s dream. It’s not a bad job really…
Dishes, ImageryDishes: Dishes: They don’t do themselves.
Apple, Apples, Computers, Food, Imagery, Laptops, TechnologyMake Your Own Apple Laptop: Make your own Apple laptop the cheap—and healthy—way!
Agony Aunt, Cheating, Dear Abby, Imagery, Motorbikes, Relationships, SexistDear Abby, I’ve Never Written To You Before…: Dear Abby, I’ve never written to you before, but I really need your advice on what could be a crucial decision…
Stress, WorkStress Management: A stress management technique recommended in all the latest psychological texts.
Animals, Penguins, SleepIf Penguins Have Knees: 3 out of 4 voices in my head want to sleep (the other wants to know if penguins have knees!)
SexistEvening Classes For Men: Instructive evening classes for men…
ImageryCharlie Sheen For Halloween: No, you can’t be Charlie Sheen for Halloween.
Geeky, Imagery, Sexist, WomenHazardous Materials Data Sheet – Woman: Hazardous Materials Data Sheet – Woman.
Boats, Books, Fishing, Reading, Sexist, WomenNever Argue With A Woman: Never Argue with a Woman…
Cats, Imagery, MailboxesMailman Jumped 15 Feet: Mailman jumped 15 feet. Dog was right. This is fun.
Advertising, April Fools, Ikea, Imagery, Product Recalls, ToolsIKEA Product Recall: IKEA product recall advert on April Fools Day
Food, Imagery, RisquéCarrot Love: When carrots get kinky…
Cables, Cables, Geeky, Imagery, UsbCables Exist In 4-dimensional Space: Proof USB cables exist in 4-dimensional space.
Animals, Dogs, Driving, Imagery, SexistDog Decides Better Driver: My wife believes she is a better driver. I let our dog decide.
Imagery, Unicorns, Unicycles, UnitardsUnicorn, Unitard, Unicycle: Unicorn in a unitard on a unicycle.
Batman, Imagery, WikileaksWikileaks: Bruce Wayne!
Food, Imagery, SexistBut God, She Won’t Even Make Me A Sandwich…: But God, She Won’t Even Make Me a Sandwich…
Australia, Buses, Explosions, Imagery, InalaSorry For Party Rocking: Sorry for Party Rocking: Driver jumps from burning bus, party bus explodes in Inala.
Australia, PoliticalCostello’s Reward For Being Loyal: Costello’s reward for being loyal…
Highway Patrol, Police, Speeding, WorkcoverSweet Justice: Workcover versus the police…
Imagery, WorkMeetings: The practical alternative to work.
Imagery, PhotographyOlympus Fights Back: Olympus Fights Back: Canon versus Olympus
Geeky, Imagery, Movies, The MatrixThe Matrix: What is The Matrix?
Animals, JokeThe Dead Rabbit: The Dead Rabbit, aka The Worst Joke Ever…
☺The World’s Shortest Books: The World’s Shortest Books
Ice Cream, ImageryI Scream Cone: I Scream Cone.
Children, Grace, PrayersSix Year Old Praying: A mother invited some people to dinner…
Imagery, MotivationalSomeone Out There Cares: I want you to know that someone out there cares. Not me, but someone does.
Advertising, Imagery, Sexist, Shoes, VintageWhere She Belongs: Keep her where she belongs…
ImageryAwkward Moment: The awkward when you already said “moment” in your head before you read it.
ImagerySound Thug: Sound Thug
ImageryApostrophe, Catastrophe: Apostrophe, Catastrophe.
Bananas, Food, Hats, ImageryBanana Hat: Banana hat…
Crocs, Imagery, Shoes, WeddingsWedding Crocs: Wedding Crocs.
Imagery, TeaMr. Tea: Mr. Tea the teapot.
Imagery, RisquéPull Out & Save: Save up to $600!
Illusion, ImageryFour Perfectly Round Circles: Four Perfectly Round Circles.
Geeky, ImageryDelete Cookies: Delete cookies?!
Geeky, Imagery, Microsoft, MsnMSN Shuts Down: We reminisce about “the good old days” of MSN…
Blackjack, Cards, Games, ImageryBlack Jack Black: Black Jack Black eating Cracker Jack playing a black jack while playing BlackJack with Jack Black who is threatening Black Jack Black with a Black Jack.
Animals, JokePygmy Dinosaur Hunter: The Pygmy Dinosaur Hunter…
Computers, Geeky, Imagery, Linux, Mac, WindowsUpdate Available: An update is available for your computer…
ImagerySimple Eye Examination Test: A simple eye examination chart.
Darth Vader, Imagery, Kristen StewartMore Expressions Than Kristen Stewart: Still more expressions than Kristen Stewart.
Australia, New Zealand, RacistAn Aussie Taxidermist In New Zealand…: An Aussie Taxidermist in New Zealand…
SchoolThe History Of The World: The History of the World, as written by the next generation…
Animals, Imagery, RacistBlack Bears: Uh oh Howard. Looks like this area has black bears…
Geeky, InternetAmusing Chat: Humour from the world of Internet Chat
Imagery, Musicians, Rolling Stones, ZombiesZombies!: Zombies! Oh, wait… false alarm, it’s just the Rolling Stones… carry on!
Food, Imagery, Pasta, TrucksPasta Truck: A pasta truck, or a very large pasta.
Accidents, Cars, ImagerySorry: A Bus Accident: Sorry: A Bus Accident
Animals, Fish, ImageryCan February March? No, But April May.: Can February March? No, but April May.
Animals, Dogs, ImageryFridge Magnets: Well, tell me, Randy. Has someone eaten all the refrigerator magnets again?
Cars, Geeky, Imagery, SqlSpeed Camera Hack: Car with SQL injection taped to the front.
Cars, ReligiousRoad Rage: Two cars were waiting at a stoplight. The light turned green, but the man didn’t notice it…
Animals, Imagery, Lord Of The Rings, OttersFilthy Hobitses: Filthy Hobitses
Animals, ImageryJust Checking: “Just doing a spot-check to see what you’re doing… Yup, sitting at your computer again!” The expression on this ostrich’s face is excellent.
Imagery, Risqué, SexistThe Lift: A man and woman meet outside an elevator door…
Imagery, Risqué, SignsPlease Use Finger: Pen is broken - please use finger.
America, Congress, Imagery, It Crowd, PoliticalCongress: Have You Tried Turning It Off And On Again?: Congress: have you tried turning it off and on again?
SexistCelibacy: Many aspects of human sexuality are very puzzling…
Computers, GeekyOperating System Airlines: Operating System Airlines.
Animals, Imagery, SealsThe Seal Of Approval: The Seal of Approval…
Animals, Dogs, Imagery, Werewolves, WolvesAware Wolf: A werewolf. A wearwolf. A warewolf. Aware wolf.
Animals, Animated, Dogs, Imagery, TonguesDog Tongue: A dog with a very long tongue.
Grammar, SpellingYou Read That Wrong: That awkward moment when you read that wrong…
Marriage, SexistSecrets To A Happy Marriage: Secrets to a Happy Marriage…
Cars, Drugs, Imagery, PoliceHow High Are You?: How High Are You? No Officer, it’s “Hi, how are you”.
Balls, Illusion, ImageryAll The Balls Are The Same Colour!: All the balls are the same colour — and that colour is brown
Imagery, Phones, Risqué, SexPhone Sex: Phone Sex. You’re doing it wrong.
English, Grammar, Risqué, School, University, WritingShort Story: A college class was told they had to write a short story in as few words as possible.…
Animals, RisquéThe Lone Ranger: The Lone Ranger was ambushed and captured by an Indian war party…
Animals, Cars, Cows, Drunk, ImageryDrunk Cows: Drunk Cows: Bruce you are drunk.
Animals, Dogs, Drugs, Imagery, MethMeth Lab Dog: Yellow Lab, Black Lab, Chocolate Lab, Meth Lab!
Animals, Giraffes, ImageryLet’s Get You Home Buddy: Two giraffe having problems getting home.
PoliticalOrdering Pizza In The Year 2025: Ordering pizza in the year 2025…
Animals, Cars, Donkeys, ImageryA BMW Donkey: A BMW donkey. Not much more to be said really.
Imagery, Jokes, Paper, Puns, SignsTearable Puns: These are tearable puns.
Computer Games, Geeky, Imagery, WorkMario: Happy: Quit your day job and do what makes you happy.
Animals, Boats, Fish, Fishing, ImageryGive A Man A Fish And He Has Food For A Day: Give a man a fish and he has food for a day. Teach a man to fish and he has to buy bamboo rods, graphite reels, monofilament lines, neoprene waders, creels, tackleboxes, lures, flies, spinners, worm rigs, slip sinkers, offset hooks, gore-tex hats, 20 pocket vests, fish finders, depth sounders, radar, boats, trailers, global positioning systems, coolers and six-packs.
Imagery, Phones, SmsChosen One: I’m the chosen one…
Animals, Cats, ImageryOn A Roll: Don’t try to stop me… ‘cause I am on a roll.
Coronavirus, Cruises, Face Masks, Imagery, Sunbathing, SunburnJust Back From Our Cruise. Had A Great Time.: Just back from our cruise. Had a great time.
Imagery, WorkNothing To Do: In case of nothing to do, break glass and then sweep up broken glass.
Imagery, Music, Rap, Rock, SignsRap Loses To Rock: Rap is like scissors, it always loses to rock.
Animals, Harry Potter, Horses, ImageryWingardium Levi-horse-a: Wingardium levi-horse-a!
America, Calendars, Imagery, Mayans, Obama, Political, PredictionsThe Mystery Of The Mayan Calendar Revealed: At last, the mystery of the Mayan calendar revealed.
Chinese, Imagery, Newspapers, SubmarinesHiding Submarines: China may be using sea to hide its submarines
Imagery, Jealousy, Relationships, SmsBaby Are You Jealous?: Baby are you jealous?
Animated, Illusion, ImageryTwo Person Optical Illusion: Optical illusion: Keep your eyes on the cross, and see what happens.
English, ImageryMissing The Point: Missing the point
Apple, Imagery, Ios, Ios6, TransportApple IOS6 Maps: For the benefit of passengers using Apple iOS6, local area maps are available from the booking office.
Army, WarAmerican Nun: A deserter GI was running down a road escaping from two MPs…
Risqué, Sexist, ViagraDealing With Hunger Pangs: A woman asks her partner at breakfast time, “Would you like some bacon and eggs a slice of toast and, maybe, some grapefruit juice and coffee?”
Cars, ImagerySomething Wrong Officer?: Something wrong officer?
Christian, Imagery, Jewish, Muslim, RacistAn Atheist, A Jew, And A Christian Walk Into A Bar…: An atheist, a Jew, and a Christian walk into a bar…
Animals, Australia, Crocodiles, Emus, Imagery, Kangaroos, Koalas, Kookaburras, Police, Sharks, Spiders, Woolworths26 Everyday Occurrences In Australia: When you live on a barely hospitable desert island that was once a continent-sized penal colony, your life tends to be a little more badass than the average person’s.
Imagery, Psychotherapists, TherapyHappy People: If you don’t see happy people, you need therapy!
Aerodynamics, Aeroplanes, ImageryAerodynamics Simplified: How planes fly.
Children, Parenting, SportChild Beating: A seven year old boy was at the centre of a courtroom drama…
Geeky, Imagery, InternetYour Computer Is Broadcasting Your IP...: Your computer is broadcasting your IP over the Internet…
Redneck, TechnologyTechnology For Country Folk: Technology for Country Folk.
Apple, Imagery, Iphone, Iphone 6, PhonesIPhone 6: Bend It Like Beckham: iPhone 6: Bend it like Beckham.
EnglishThe Gender Neutral Term For Sugar Daddy: The gender neutral term for sugar daddy is glucose guardian.
English, Grammar, Imagery, School, TeachersGrammar Vandal: When English teachers snap: Sorry Ma’am, but bad grammar is no excuse for vandalism.
☺The Poodle And The Leopard: Experience trumps youth.
Explosions, Guns, ImageryTold Her Not To Brag About Her Barbie Dream House…: Told her not to brag about her barbie dream house…
Computer Games, Imagery, SexistCall Of Duty: Women’s Edition: Call of Duty: Women’s Edition.
Imagery, Michael Jackson, Performers, SingersMichael Jackson Is Dead: You Can Come Out Now…
Aeroplanes, Imagery, Oceans, SubmarinesSubmarines In The Sky: Did you know that there are more planes in the sea than there are submarines in the sky?
Alcohol, Australia, Bob Hawke, Imagery, Oxford, PoliticalBob Hawke’s Yard Of Ale: While at university at Oxford in 1963, Bob Hawke, former Prime Minister of Australia, entered the Guinness Book of Records here at the Turf Tavern after downing a yard of ale (that’s just over 2½ pints!) in just 11 seconds.
Imagery, MondaysShortest Horror Story: Monday: Shortest horror story: Monday.
Imagery, SexistBefore And After...: Before and after marriage…
Animals, Bikes, Frogs, Imagery, Kermit The FrogWrong Way: Wrong Way
ImageryProof That Not Knowing Everything Is The Best Way To Go: Proof that not knowing everything is the best way to go.
Imagery, Psychotherapists, SignsPsycho The Rapist: Psycho the Rapist It’s one word George!
Bob Hope, Imagery, Johnny Cash, Kevin Bacon, Steve JobsDon’t Let Kevin Bacon Die: 20 years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have No Cash, No Hope and No Jobs. Please don’t let Kevin Bacon die.
Imagery, Signs, WarningsThrew Caution To The Wind: Looks like someone threw caution to the wind.
Imagery, Reincarnation, WoodReincarnation Gone Horribly Wrong: Reincarnation gone horribly wrong
Australia, Games, Imagery, ReligiousThanks God: God and the Rubiks Cube…
Joke, MathMath Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now?
Advertising, Clothing, Fashion, Imagery, SexistWhy Men Die Before Women: Why men die before women.
Dads, Imagery, Jokes, Phones, SmsSometimes I Sit On The Floor And Put My Arms Around My Knees And Lean Forward: Dad: Sometimes I sit on the floor and put my arms around my knees and lean forward. Daughter: Huh? Dad: Cuz that’s how I roll!
Imagery, Internet, SwordsSwords Of The Centuries: Swords of the Centuries
Cars, Imagery, MessagesThe 710 Cap: Hun I have a problem in my car…
Adobe, Geeky, Imagery, UpdatesAdobe Updates: I don’t always have an update…
Computer Games, Imagery, MarioIt’s A-me, Mario!: Mario emerging from a drainpipe.
Medical, RisquéBetter Than A Flu Shot: Better than a Flu Shot
Earth, ImageryHeld Hands Around The Equator: If the human population held hands around the equator, a significant portion of them would drown.
SexistPunctuation Is Powerful.: Punctuation is powerful.
Australia, Imagery, Racist, Tintin, WynnumThe Adventures Of TinTin: TinTin In Wynnum: The Adventures of TinTin: TinTin in Wynnum.
Clothes, Hats, Imagery, TiesYou Hang Around, I’ll Go On Ahead: You hang around, I’ll go on ahead.
Fans, ImageryThank You To All My Fans: Thank you to all my fans
Buffering, Buffy, Imagery, TvBuffy Buffering: Buffy buffering…
Imagery, NinjasNinja Exit: Ninja Exit Only
☺Pages By Date: A list of all the pages, sorted by their last updated or creation dates.
Political, RisquéHillary Clinton Goes To Her Doctor For A Physical…: Hillary Clinton goes to her doctor for a physical…
Bricks, Footpaths, Imagery, OcdOCD Bricks: The worst thing that can happen to an OCD person…
Cars, Dumbledore, Harry Potter, Imagery, PetrolExpecto Petroleum!: Expecto Petroleum!
Comics, Guns, Hands, ImageryHands In The Air!: Hands in the air! Now wave them around like you just don’t care!
Chat, Imagery, InternetChat Rooms: Chat Rooms – you never really know.
Geeky, JokesIP Jokes: I’d tell you a UDP joke, but you may not get it.
Alcohol, ChemistryAlcohol Is A Solution: Not to get technical but according to chemistry alcohol is a solution.
Animals, Dogs, ImageryA Little Hand: I wish you could give me a little hand…
Imagery, Rallies, Sexist, WomenWhat Women Want: Who are we? Women! What do we want? We don’t know! When do we want it? NOW!
Bags, Imagery, ShoppingI’ll Be Bag: A bag titled “I’ll Be Bag”
Animals, RisquéDoctor Bob Had Sex With One Of His Patients…: Doctor Bob had sex with one of his patients and felt guilty all day long…
Charts, Computer Games, Imagery, Pacman, Pie ChartsPacman Pie Chart: The Pacman pie chart.
Comics, Education, ImageryUnused Diploma.: I’d like to return this. It’s unused. This is your diploma. Cash is fine.
Imagery, Jobs, Pie Charts, Statistics, WorkChance Of Keeping Your Job If You’re Wrong More Than 75% Of The Time: Chance of keeping your job if you’re wrong more than 75% of the time.
ImageryCockroach Cancer: Please, don’t throw your cigarette butts on the floor…
Drink, Food, ImageryThings To Eat And Drink In Public: Things to eat and drink in public.
Animals, Jokes, Puns, Racing, SnailsI Took The Shell Off My Racing Snail, Thinking It Would Make Him Run Faster.: I took the shell off my racing snail, thinking it would make him run faster.
RacistOnly In America...: Only in America…
Cars, Imagery, Time TravelAnnual Meeting Of Time Travellers: Annual Meeting of Time Travellers.
Daleks, Doctor Who, Geeky, RobotsWhat Would Robots From The 1960's…: What would robots from 1960’s and 1970’s TV say today with current software installed?
Geeky, RisquéEUNUCH Programmer's Manual - CONDOM(1): The EUNUCH Programmer's Manual - CONDOM(1)
Animals, Imagery, Nuclear Power, SpidersSpider Farm: This seems like a disaster waiting to happen…
Cars, ImageryAbove The Law Like A Boss: Above the law like a boss: removing a wheel clamp.
Animals, Carrots, Food, Imagery, Rabbits, VegetablesSuccess Is Not Always What You See: Success is not always what you see…
Marriage, Religious, Sexist, WivesGood & Obedient Wives: And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world…
Animals, Cats, Imagery, SignsHelp Cat Neds Air: Please don’t let the cat out. No matter what it tells you!
Art, Geeky, ImageryNational Portrait Gallery: National Portrait Gallery. National Landscape Gallery…
Australia, Chillis, Food, Racist, TexasAn Australian Chilli Tester In Texas…: An Australian chilli tester in Texas…
Animals, Imagery, SharksSharks Are A Lot Friendlier Without Pointy Teeth: Sharks are a lot friendlier without pointy teeth.
Accidents, Cars, Imagery, Seatbelts, SexistNew Seatbelt Design: 45% Less Car Accidents!: A man driving a car while a woman sits beside him, with her seatbelt across her mouth, preventing her from commenting.
Diving, Imagery, Sharks, Sign LanguageA Signal They Forgot To Teach You In Your Open Water Class.: Big shark behind you: A signal they forgot to teach you in your open water class.
Football, Relationships, Sexist, SportThe Loving Husband: A man had two of the best tickets for the opening State of Origin match. As he sits down, another man comes along and asks if anyone is sitting in the seat next to him…
Bottles, Imagery, Messages, UsbModern Day Message In A Bottle: A USB stick in a bottle lying on the beach.
Animals, Dogs, ImageryAchilles’ Heel: You got a dog?! Yup! His name is Achilles…
Computer Games, Geeky, Imagery, SexistXBOX Girlfriend: A real girlfriend does not complain when her boyfriend is on his xbox…
America, Coronavirus, Imagery, Political, Presidents, TrumpInject Yourselves With Disinfectant!: Inject Yourselves with Disinfectant!
Advertising, Imagery, Sexist, Sweaters, VintageMen Are Better Than Women!: Indoors, women are useful — even pleasant. On a mountain they are something of a drag. So don’t go hauling them up a cliff…
Australia, Imagery, Nsw, PolicePoliceman’s Ball: A young woman was pulled over for speeding. A NSW Police Officer walked to her car window flipping open his ticket book. She said “I bet you are going to try and sell me a ticket to the Policeman’s Ball.” He said, “NSW Police don’t have balls.” There was a moment of silence. Then he closed his book, tipped his hat, and got back in his patrol car and left!
Animals, Babies, Biblical, Dogs, Imagery, ReligiousTake His Wife And Flee: It seems Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but she looked back and turned into a pillar of salt! What happened to the flea?
Imagery, MenI'd Rather Break My Arms Than Take Two Trips: I'd rather break my arms than take two trips.
Boobs, Imagery, Risqué, SexistAmazing Hidden Images: Amazing Hidden Images!
Jokes, RisquéWhere Is Amanda’s Husband?: Amanda is 21 years older than her son John. In 6 years from now, Amanda will be 5 times as old as John…
Religious, RisquéSisters Of St Francis: Sisters of St. Francis House of Prostitution…
ImageryCaution: Door May Open: Caution: Door May Open.
Board Games, Games, ImageryGroup Therapy: …is not going to make Q any less of a hated letter.
SexistWinter Classes For Men: Winter Classes for Men at the Learning Centre for Adults
Joke, RisquéJam And Butter The Muddy Plasters, The Dirty Bucket Of Pitch!: Jam and butter the muddy plasters, the dirty bucket of pitch!
Aeroplanes, Aircraft, Imagery, WarRequesting Air Support: Requesting Air Support! “Believe in yourself. You can do it!”
Animals, Elephants, Imagery, RisquéElephant Upskirt: Elephant Upskirt.
For Sale, Imagery, Posters, PrintersPrinter For Sale: Printer For Sale. Works Terribly.
Bras, Imagery, New Zealand, Racist, Risqué, SportThe All Blacks Bra: Introducing the New Zealand All Blacks Bra. All the support, but no cup.
Animals, Dogs, ImageryI See What You Did There: I see what you did there… also, over here…
English, WordsI’m Awkward When People Compliment Me…: I’m awkward when people compliment me… “Nice hair” Me: “Thanks, I grew it myself”
Animals, Bananas, Dogs, Food, ImageryBanana Dogs: Banana Dogs.
☺Helpful Hints: Helpful Hints
Australia, Democracy, Imagery, Political, RisquéAmazing Holes: Amazing Holes from Around the World.
Cameras, Cannons, Imagery, NikonI Have A Cannon: You have a Nikon? I have a Cannon.
Imagery, Odin, PoliticalVote Odin: The left wing said they’d abolish poverty; right wing said they’d abolish bureaucracy. Odin said he’d abolish ice giants. Where are the ice giants? Vote Odin!
Browsers, Chrome, Firefox, Geeky, Imagery, Internet, Internet Explorer, Opera, SafariIE Retarded: I hope he doesn’t say something retarded…
Doorbells, Imagery, Logan, RacistLogan Doorbell: To ring door bell, connect wires.
Facebook, InternetFacebook Farm: A dying granny tells her granddaughter, “I want to leave you my farm…
BabiesA Baby’s Laughter Is One Of The Most Beautiful Sounds You’ll Ever Hear: A baby’s laughter is one of the most beautiful sounds you’ll ever hear. Unless it’s 3 AM, you’re home alone, and you don’t have a baby.
Imagery, PhonesJack’s Phone: Why aren’t you answering…?
Illusion, ImageryTwelve Or Thirteen?: Wait until the group changes position. Is it twelve or thirteen?
☺Notice: Notice is hereby given…
Earth, Imagery, Risqué, Solar SystemDon’t Masturbate: Don’t Masturbate!
Browsers, Chrome, Firefox, Imagery, Internet Explorer, Opera, SafariBrowsers: Their Differences: The differences between the major web browsers.
Imagery, Tools, Work, ZombiesIn Case Of Zombies: In case of zombies… or yard work…
Angry Birds, Animals, Australia, Birds, Computer Games, ImageryAngry Birds Australia: Angry Birds Australia…
Geeky, ItNetwork Truths: The Twelve Networking Truths.
Animals, Cats, Egyptians, God, ImageryHow To Distract An Egyptian God: How to distract an Egyptian God
Crime, Police, ShootingThe Floor Is Still Wet: I have an interesting case here. An old lady shot her husband for stepping on the floor she just mopped…
Brisbane, Imagery, Logan, Racist, WoodridgeSimba & Woodridge: But what about that shadowy place?
Animals, Conspiracies, Dogs, Imagery, SheepThat Conspiracy Stuff: I’m telling you – the man and the dog are definitely working together…
Animals, Dogs, Imagery, SnakesLong Dogs: A man walking two long dogs meets a man walking two normal dogs…
Imagery, Risqué, SexistGrow Some Balls: Why do people say ‘grow some balls’?
Australia, Cricket, Imagery, VideoHow Cricket Looks To Most People: How Cricket Looks to Most People.
Africa, Animals, Cars, Elephants, ImageryYou Know You Are Having A Bad Day When…: You know you are having a bad day when…
Imagery, SmsBack From The Dead: Woo, it’s me! Back from the dead!
Political, SchoolMath Instruction: At Heathrow Airport today…
Computer Games, Imagery, SexistThe Way Girls Play Computer Games: The way girls play computer games.
Risqué, SexistMating Bulls: A man took his wife to the Rodeo and one of the exhibits is that of breeding bulls…
Doctors, HospitalsFinding Information In Hospital: A sweet grandmother telephoned St. Joseph’s Hospital…
Geeky, ItHow To Please Your IT Department: How to please your IT department.
Imagery, KnittingWinter Knitting: What are you going to knit this winter?
Imagery, MusicI’m Not Just Another Brick In The Wall: We don’t need no education…
Jokes, MathMath Joke: Math joke.
George Bush, Imagery, Iran, Political, Weapons Of Mass Destruction, WmdI Can’t Believe The “WMD” Trick Is Working Again With Iran: I can’t believe the “WMD” trick is working again with Iran. Suckers…
Dinosaurs, Imagery, Political, SpyingIf You’re Not Doing Anything Wrong, You Shouldn’t Have Anything To Hide: The government says “If you’re not doing anything wrong, you shouldn’t have anything to hide.” If that is true, shouldn’t the government declassify everything?
Computers, Geeky, ImagerySpeed Reader: Wow you read that fast! You must be a speed reader!
ImageryBatman Downsized: Batman forced to downsize with increase in petrol prices…
Girls, Imagery, Moon, Photography, Sexist, Space, WomenWent To The Moon, Took 5 Photos. Went To The Bathroom, Took 37 Photos.: Went to the moon, took 5 photos. Went to the bathroom, took 37 photos.
Credit Cards, Genies, Imagery, Sexist, WomenIrresistible To Women: Make me irresistible to women
Animals, Dogs, Imagery, Phones, SmsTexts From My Dog: My dog sends me texts…
Bras, Imagery, UnderwearSupport Bras: Supportive support bras…
Facebook, Imagery, InternetFuture Man: So you’re saying people will “tweet” what they’re eating for breakfast?
Apple, Imagery, Ios, Ios7, Iphone, Mobiles, PhonesThe New IPhone 5C With IOS 7: The new iPhone 5C with IOS 7.
Chewing Gum, Imagery, WarningsDo Not Swallow Chewing Gum: Warning: Do not swallow chewing gum!
Animals, Cats, Dogs, JokeWoof: How do you get a cat to bark like a dog?
Cooking, Imagery, Smoke DetectorsWhat Smoke Detectors Warn You About: What smoke detectors warn you about.
Australia, Imagery, Kevin Rudd, PoliticalThe Many Hands Of Kevin Rudd: The many hand gestures of Kevin Rudd.
Beer, Calendars, Imagery, Mayans, Predictions2 Mayan Guys: [2 Mayan Guys] Wanna beer? I’m working on this calendar, but I guess if I don’t finish it won’t be the end of the world.
Animals, Cats, ImageryCat In A Cat Box: A cat in a Cat box.
America, Animated, Imagery, Obama, PoliticalThanks, Obama: Thanks, Obama.
Geeky, InternetUsing AOL? Mind If We LOL?: Using AOL? Mind if we LOL?
Gandalf, Harry Potter, Imagery, Lord Of The Rings, Patrick Stewart, Star Trek, Star WarsHow To Offend Four Groups Of Geeks With One Picture: How to offend four groups of geeks with one picture.
Imagery, SexistRealistic Remotes: Some more useful remote controls we would like to see.
Animals, Dogs, Imagery, RisquéBitches & Hose: Having so much fun…
☺Got To Love Drunk People: >A man, and his wife are awakened at 3 o’clock in the morning by a loud pounding on the door…
Animals, Chickens, Eggs, Imagery, SignsBoneless Chicken: Boneless Chicken
Coathangers, Imagery, WarningsDo Not Swallow Coathangers!: Caution: Do Not Swallow Coathangers!
Animals, Art, Bananas, Carving, Food, Horses, ImageryBanana Carving: Banana Carving.
America, Imagery, Nsa, Obama, Phones, SpyingObama: “Aww No! Both Of You Hang Up!”: Her: “Ok, you hang up.” Him: “No, you hang up.” Her: “Haha, no you hang up.” Obama: “Aww no! Both of you hang up!”
Geeky, ImageryVoice: Scrooge and Donald on IRC.
Great Expectations, ImageryGreat Expectations: Who hurt you? My own expectations.
Imagery, Ocd, ShirtsI Have CDO. It’s Like OCD But All The Letters Are In Alphabetical Order.: I have CDO. It’s like OCD but all the letters are in alphabetical order. As they should be.
Food, Imagery, WorkKikkoman When He’s Down: Your boss called to say you’re fired. So I bought your favourite soy sauce…
Animals, Djs, Fishing, Imagery, MusicDrop The Bass: Can’t go fishing, ‘cause I always drop the bass…
America, Guns, RacistWhat Do You Call A Gun Enthusiast?: You may have heard on the news about a Southern California man who was put under 72-hour psychiatric observation when it was found he owned 100 guns and allegedly had 100,000 rounds of ammunition stored in his home…
Imagery, Music, Rock, RocksJust Listening To Some Rock: Just listening to some rock
☺Idiots: Idiots everywhere…
Breakfast, ImageryHow Did You Get In My House?: If I make you breakfast in bed, a simple “Thank you” is all I need. Not all this “How did you get in my house?” business.
Knock Knock, PolicePolice: Knock Knock: Police: Knock Knock. Me: Who is it? Police: It’s the police.
ImageryBest Way To Freak Out Your Friends: Best way to freak out your friends: Do not open unless you plan to kill it (written on an upside down container)
Alcohol, Holidays, Imagery, WineHoliday Workout: Holiday Workout: Three corkscrews.
Australia, Coronavirus, Imagery, Political, Politicians, Scott MorrisonA Visual Representation Of Scott Morrison’s Address To The Nation: A visual representation of Scott Morrison’s address to the nation tonight
Imagery, Nietzsche, ReligiousNietzsche Is Dead: God is dead” ~Nietzsche / “Nietzsche is dead” ~God.
Animals, Imagery, KangaroosI Said Be Quiet! Don’t Make Me Come In There!: I said be quiet! Don’t make me come in there!
Children, Parenting, Risqué“Hi Honey. This Is Daddy. Is Mummy Near The Phone?”: Hi honey. This is Daddy. Is Mummy near the phone?
ImageryTimes Have Changed: An image from an operating manual for the SAGE air defense system
Browsers, Chrome, Firefox, Geeky, Imagery, Internet, Internet ExplorerWhat Are We? Browsers!: What are we? Browsers! What do we want? More speed! And when do we want it? Right now!
Darth Vader, ImageryBreathe Right: Darth Vader going for some Breathe Right.
Advertising, Imagery, Rice, Risqué, Sexist, VintageVa-Rice-Ity: My Man Likes Something Unexpected…: My man likes something unexpected now and then. That’s why I serve him rice.
Babies, Imagery, RisquéI Will Deprive You Of Sex: I will deprive you of sex all night with my crying and then suck on your wife’s tits in the morning.
Business Cards, ImageryYou Have A Nice… Business Card: A business card: “You have a nice… {day, ass, attitude}.
Animated, Fighting, Imagery, WweThrown Out Of The Ring: Thrown out of the Ring.
Imagery, PoliticalThailand Has The Largest Mormon Population: Did you know Thailand has the largest Mormon population in Africa?
Coronavirus, Hands, Hand Washing, Imagery, WashingRemember To Wash Your Hands!: My drawing is not great but please remember to wash your hands. Stay safe guys!
Animals, ImagerySeven Sharks: If you own 7 cats then people will think you’re crazy…
Boats, Fishing, Imagery, Logan, RacistFishing, Logan Style: Fishing, Logan Style.
Forecasting, ImageryJohn’s Weather Forecasting Stone: One of the most reliable ways of forecasting…
Animals, Imagery, JokeThe World’s Funniest Joke: The World’s Funniest Joke…
Boobs, Imagery, Risqué, Sexist, WorkJob Application: Sexist job application.
Advertising, Cigarettes, Imagery, Risqué, Sexist, VintageBlow In Her Face: Blow in her face and she'll follow you anywhere.
Evolution, Imagery, ZombiesZombie Evolution: The evolution of Zombies
Advertising, Imagery, Sexist, VintageDormeyer Crying Wives: Wives: Look this ad over carefully. Circle the items you want for Christmas. Show it to your husband. If he does not go to the store immediately, cry a little…
English, GrammarParaprosdokians: Paraprosdokians are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous.
English, Etymology, Imagery, Languages, SpanishEntero Somewhere Elso: English: Do Not Enter Here; Spanish: Entero Somewhere Elso.
Driving, Sexist, WomenDamn Women Drivers: This morning on the freeway, I looked over to my left and there was a woman in a brand new Cadillac doing 110…
SexistMen Are Like...: Men are like…
English, Grammar, ImageryComforting A Grammar Nazi: When comforting a grammar nazi, I always say softly, “there, their, they’re”
Animals, Cats, ImageryHello Kitty: It’s sickeningly cute. Perhaps literally if its expression is anything to go by…
GeekyQ209354 - HOWTO: How to RTFM…
Animals, Imagery, LlamasGet In The Llama: No time to explain! Get in the llama…
Geeky, Imagery, Microsoft, Microsoft OfficeMicrosoft Office Suite Pass Key: Does anyone have an extra Microsoft Office suite pass key?
Computers, ImageryTimes Change: …but other things don’t.
Imagery, Police, ProtestsPolice & Protesters Help Fat Man Remove Pants: Police & Protesters help fat man remove pants…
Bogans, Imagery, Iphone, SpeakersBogan Bass: Bogan Bass: Yet somehow still better than Beats by Dr Dre.
America, Imagery, North Korea, Obama, RacistNorth Korea: I Will Destroy America: North Korea: I will destroy America! Obama: Too late!
Animals, Cats, Imagery, RacoonsCat Found: Cat Found. Very aggressive.
Africa, Animals, Bikes, ImageryUpsetting The Food Chain: A zebra on a motorbike…
Imagery, Mobiles, Mouse Traps, Phones, TelstraCustomer Retention: Free Phone Telstra Style.
Imagery, Iphone, Phones, Romance, SmsThe Modern Day Romantic: Goodnight my beautiful girl I’m so lucky to have you in my life. I love you so much <3
Adoption, Babies, ImageryAdopted Baby: Dude, I’m joking, you are not adopted!
Animals, Imagery, Seals, SharksDo Not Consume If Seal Is Broken!: Do not consume if seal is broken!
Al Qaeda, Bin Laden, Imagery, Political, TerrorismI Usually Get 9/11: I don’t always get rated on my terrorism attacks, but when I do, I usually get 9/11.
Imagery, Masturbation, RisquéI’m Starting To Think My Husband Masturbates: I’m not absolutely certain yet, but I’m starting to think my husband masturbates
Harry Potter, Imagery, Magic, Risqué, WandsReplace The Word “wand” With “dick” In Any Sentence In Harry Potter: Replace the word “wand” with “dick” in any sentence in Harry Potter…
Imagery, Motorbikes, RisquéSexy Motorbike: I am not too sure what to say about this…
Animals, Animated, Imagery, PenguinsPenguin Falls: Penguin falling on ice.
SexistMen Vs. Women: Men versus women…
Imagery, Music, Musical Instruments, Sex, Violence, ViolinsSax And Violins: Warning: This image contains sax and violins. Viewer discretion is advised.
Guns, ImageryThe Last Known Picture Taken Of Grandpa: A woman inadvertently points a gun towards a man.
Bill Gates, Imagery, Mario, North Korea, Star Wars, WinrarThe Good Guys Of The World: These are the Good Guys of the World.
Animals, Eggs, Giraffes, ImageryGiraffe Egg: Giraffe Egg.
America, Capitalist, ImageryIn Capitalist America…: Bank robs you!
Acronyms, Imagery, Iphone, PhonesIDK LY TTYL: IDK LY TTYL: I don’t know, love you, talk to you later.
Animated, ImageryWait!: Wait…
Christmas, Christmas Lights, ImageryChristmas Lights: Ditto: Ditto to that…
Risqué, WorkThe Boss’s Quandary: The Boss’s Quandary…
Advertising, Imagery, Sexist, VintageHappier With A Hoover: Christmas morning she’ll be happier with a Hoover.
Geeky, ItDeclaration Of A Software Professional: Declaration of a Software Professional.
Imagery, SexistAlways Love A Woman For Her Personality: Always love a woman for her personality. They have like 10, so you can choose.
Illusion, ImageryConfused Carpentry: A Carpenter’s Nightmare.
Imagery, Phones, SmsStreet Name: Hey, what’s your street name?
Campbell Newman, Imagery, Political, QueenslandCampbell Newman: Public Service: You Can Trust Me: [Campbell Newman laughing] …and then I said to the public service… you can trust me…
Flowcharts, Imagery, SexistHow To Argue With A Woman: A flowchart.
Australia, Brisbane, Computer Games, Explosions, Guns, Imagery, PoliceBrisbane, GTA Style: Queen Street Mall, Brisbane, GTA Style.
Comics, Dancing, Imagery, Ireland, Irish, Irish DanceThe Book Of Irish Dance: Volume Two: Whilst doing a long overdue clearout at the offices of Ireland’s oldest and most respected school of dance, Mrs O’Hara made a terrible discovery…
Afghanistan, RacistInvestment Opportunity: Investment Opportunity. Thought you might want to consider getting on board early.
ShoppingGrocery Shopping On An Empty Stomach: Accidentally went grocery shopping on an empty stomach and now I’m the proud owner of aisle 4.
Cars, Imagery, MoviesDiesel: Hey, wanna know what I put in my car?
Australia, Banks, ImageryAustralian Banks: Australian Bank Logos.
Animals, Cows, ImageryA Cow Getting A Back Scratch: A cow getting a back scratch.
ImageryTechnically Correct: …but still wrong.
Animals, Imagery, WhalesPaper, Scissors, Whale!: Scissors cut paper again! I hate this game…
Imagery, Shirts, Tourettes, TshirtsWhat Do We Want? A Cure For Tourettes!: What do we want? A cure for tourettes! When do we want it? …
Books, ImageryRead Your Book Case: A bookcase worth reading.
Geeky, Imagery, TechnologyBack-Up: Image of man backing-up with computer.
☺Fifteen Things To Do At The Supermarket…: Fifteen things to do at the supermarket while your spouse is taking their sweet time…
ImageryEmoticons: Lots of emoticons…
Animals, Antelopes, ImageryDid You Know There Is A Species Of Antelope Capable Of Jumping Higher Than The Average House?: Did you know there is a species of antelope capable of jumping higher than the average house? This is due to its powerful hind legs and the fact that the average house cannot jump.
Books, Imagery, Sexist“Understanding Women” Now Available In Paperback: The book “Understanding Women” is now available in paperback!
Money, Quotations, SchwarzeneggerHaving More Money Doesn’t Make You Happier: Having more money doesn’t make you happier. I have 50 million dollars but I’m just as happy as when I had 48 million.
RisquéMickey Mouse: One day, Mickey Mouse decided that he wanted a divorce…
ImagerySteady Hand – The Results: Steady Hand – The Results (or what happens when you play Steady Hand)
Bacon, ImageryTen Pieces Of Bacon: If I had 10 pieces of bacon, and you took 4, what would you have? Yes, that’s right you’d have a black eye and a bruised hand.
ImageryHard To Pay Fine: Touching wires causes instant death…
Advertising, Cocaine, Drugs, Imagery, Toothache, VintageCocaine Toothache Drops: Cocaine Toothache Drops: Instantaneous Cure! 15¢.
Elderly, MemoryElderly Memories: An elderly couple had dinner at another couple’s house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen…
Imagery, RisquéToo Long: Her: Do you want to her a joke about my vagina? Nevermind… you’ll never get it! Her: Do you want to her a joke about my vagina? Nevermind… you’ll never get it!
Cars, ImageryCar Alarms: Car alarms: They piss me off!
PoliticalBush And The Queen: While visiting England, George Bush is invited to tea with the Queen…
Apple, Computers, Imagery, Religious, Steve JobsHe’s Gonna Upgrade Your Tablets…: Moses, meet Steve. He’s gonna upgrade your tablets…
Animals, Dachshunds, Dogs, Imagery, RacingDachshund Racing: Googled “dachshund racing”. Was not disappointed.
Imagery**** I Forgot To Turn Off The Oven: **** I forgot to turn off the oven.
Animals, Australia, Cats, Horse Racing, Horses, Imagery, Jockeys, Melbourne Cup, SportMelbourne Cup Cat Horse: Melbourne Cup Cat Horse.
Blogs, Grammar, Imagery, SpellingMisspelt Blog Post: You wouldn't think anyone reads my blog. I haven’t got a comment in weeks. Misspell something…
Animals, Chocolate, Dogs, Heaven, ImageryA Dog Dies: Can I Have Chocolate?: A dog dies and finds out chocolate killed him.
Computers, Geeky, ItComputer Quotes: Computer quotes.
Babies, ImageryDraw Fake Eyebrows On Your Baby: Draw fake eyebrows on your baby. Then sit back and enjoy the humour.
Police, RisquéPanties: Policewoman: Anything you say will be taken down!
Animated, Illusion, Imagery, Impossible Triangle, Penrose TrianglePenrose Triangle: Penrose Triangle Animation.
Computer Games, ImageryVideo Games Don’t Make Us Violent – Lag Does!: Video games don’t make us violent – lag does!
Acid, Animals, Cats, Cocaine, Coffee, Drugs, Heroin, Imagery, Marijuana, Mushrooms, Shrooms, WeedDrug Cats: An illustrated cat-guide to drugs…
Animals, Fire, Imagery, SpidersThere Was A Spider, I Panicked: There was a spider, I panicked. But I think it’s gone now.
Advertising, Imagery, Sexist, Vintage, VitaminsThe Harder A Wife Works, The Cuter She Looks: So the harder a wife works, the cuter she looks!
Animals, Beavers, Birds, Cats, Dogs, Fish, Frogs, Horses, Imagery, Puns, Rabbits, ZebraPunny Animals: Who ever invented the “knock-knock jokes” should get a no-bell prize!
Animals, Drugs, ImageryFlying Ants: How ants began to fly…
Alarms, Animals, Clocks, Imagery, SpidersAlarm Clock That Releases Spiders: Million dollar idea… alarm clock that releases spiders! Now you’re up!
PoliticalLabel Instructions: French Label Instructions
RacistAmerican History 101: American History 101
Art, Imagery, Michelangelo, Paintings, Reenactment, Sistine ChapelMichelangelo: The Re-enactment: A re-enactment of Michelangelo’s famous “The Creation of Adam”.
Imagery, Seniors, WarDrafting Guys Over 60: New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!
Beer, ImagerySix Die In Horror Smash: Six Die in Horror Smash.
Animals, Imagery, SpidersLet’s All Take A Moment And Be Thankful That Spiders Don’t Fly.: Let’s all take a moment and be thankful that spiders don’t fly!
Risqué, SexKeep Your Mouth Shut: If you don’t believe in oral sex, keep your mouth shut!
Jokes, Punography, PunsPunography: I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me…
Brooms, Imagery, Parking, Sexist, Witches, WomenWomen Can’t Park: Who said that women can’t park?
Imagery, StovesCool Stoves: Cool Stoves
Animals, Imagery, Languages, Latin, PigsPig Latin: Pig Latin…
Comics, Imagery, VeganI Am Going Vegan: I am going vegan
Animals, Imagery, SealsSeal The Deal: What do you say we go behind this rock and seal the deal?
Imagery, RedneckRedneck Ingenuity: Redneck Ingenuity: Shoes for tyres.
English, WordsWhat Is A Word Made Up Of 4 Letters Yet Is Also Made Up Of 3: What is a word made up of 4 letters yet is also made up of 3. Although is written with 8 letters, and then with 4. Rarely consists of 6, and never is written with 5.
Animals, Australia, Dropbears, Imagery, KoalasDrop Bears – Department Of Dangerous Fauna Management: Dropbears are a very real danger to all Australians. Almost one in ten Australians has been attacked by a Dropbear, and the rate is even higher for foreign visitors. Don’t become another statistic. Always beware low branches and doorframes. Look up. Stay Alive.
Animals, Dogs, Imagery, SpidersSpider Dog: Spider Dog…
Engineering, Flowcharts, Geeky, ImageryEngineering Flowchart: Nothing duct tape and WD-40 can’t fix…
Animals, Dieting, DogsPurina Diet: The Purina Pet Food Diet.
Energy Drinks, Geeky, Imagery, Rubiks CubesMonster Energy Drinks & Rubiks Cubes: Monster energy drinks & Rubiks Cubes: Dude. You have a problem. Problem solved!
Aboriginal, Australia, Gay, RacistAboriginal Jobs: At the end of a tiny, deserted bar is a huge Aboriginal bloke…
Computers, Geeky, Imagery, Internet Explorer, Mac, WindowsCan Your Mac Do This?: Can your Mac do this? I don’t think so…
Easter, Eggs, ImageryDye Job: Check out the dye job on her? Tramp!
Advertising, Boats, Imagery, Oceans, Oxi-clean, ShipsThe Power Of Oxi-Clean: The Power of Oxi-Clean.
Comics, Imagery, Movies, WorkPopular Sayings #38: Dress for the job you want, not the one you have.
Angels, Imagery, Red Bull, SculpturesRed Bull Gives You Wings: Red Bull Gives You Wings.
ImageryWhat Is A Sonofabitch?: What is a sonofab*tch, exactly?
ImageryLow Battery Warning: Plug in or find another power source. Or panic now!
ImageryHow To Be Green: A boardgame: How to be Green…
Guns, Imagery, Mp3, Mp4, Mp5Well, That Escalated Quickly: Well, that escalated quickly.
Imagery, ShopsBall-type Deodorant: Her: Is it the ball-type deodorant you want sir? Him: Oh no miss – it’s for under my arms!
Communist, Computer Games, Geeky, ImageryA Case In Communism: The Super Mario Story: A Case in Communism: The Super Mario Story.
Imagery, RisquéJelly Orgy: A jelly orgy.
Clowns, Imagery, Risqué, Sex, WomenShe Made That Clown Extremely Happy: She made that clown extremely happy.
RisquéTest Your Subconscious: This revolutionary test will expose the secret desires from your subconscious…
Imagery, Sexist, WomenFeminine Instincts: If a girl ever pulls out a knife on you during an argument, pull out some bread and mayo. Her feminine instincts will kick in and she’ll make you a sandwich.
America, Guns, ImageryHow To Sneak Chocolate Into An American Movie Theatre.: How to sneak chocolate into an American movie theatre.
PoliticalScientific Breakthrough – Governmentium: A major research institution recently announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been named Governmentium.
☺Pregnancy & Women: Questions: Pregnancy & Women: Frequently Asked Questions
English, GrammarYour There: They’re they are.
ImageryAlzheimer’s: “I may have alzheimer’s, but at least I don’t have alzheimer’s”
Computers, ImageryInsert Disk Two: Please insert disk two.
GeekyUnusual EBay Feedback: A+++! Would read this amusing page again…
Imagery, MilkLying About Skim Milk: There’s only one thing I hate more than lying. Skim milk, which is water that’s lying about being milk.
ImagerySuper Batman: The Super Batman back pack, exclusive from China!
France, Germany, Imagery, RacistAngela Merkel Arrives At Passport Control At Paris Airport…: Angela Merkel arrives at Passport Control at Paris airport. “Nationality?” asks the immigration officer. “German,” she replies. “Occupation?” “No, just here for a few days.”
Bathrooms, Coronavirus, Imagery, Public TransportExperts Recommend Keeping Your Daily Rituals Even While Working From Home: Experts recommend keeping your daily rituals even while working from home
Diets, Food, Paleolithic DietPaleolithic Diet: Something’s just not right—our air is clean, our water is pure, we all get plenty of exercise, everything we eat is organit and free-range, and yet nobody lives past thirty.
Animated, ImageryA Teaser: You must stare very closely at the door in this image for around 30 seconds…
Imagery, Self-help, SexSex Maniac: Dear Dr Ruth, I’m writing to tell you my problem. It seems I have been married to a sex maniac for the past 22 years…
ImageryPolice Station Toilet Stolen: Police Station Toilet Stolen… Cops have nothing to go on.
Imagery, RisquéFingering A Minor: Fingering A Minor for hours on my bed.
Imagery, TvThinking Outside The Square: A sideways television.
Facebook, ImageryBe The First Of Your Friends To Like This Post.: A post with a poster on it, “Be the first of your friends to like this post”.
Animals, Dogs, ImageryI Forgot How To Dog: I forgot how to dog
Boats, Imagery, IslandsBoat! Land!: Boat! Land!
Advertising, Imagery, Motorola, Tv, VintageTelevision Benefits Your Children: How television benefits your children.
Roadwork, Shovels, WorkersWe Forgot Our Shovels: A road crew foreman calls into the shop. Foreman: “We have a problem.”
Australia, Doctors, Imagery, SpidersAustralian Spider Bite: That spider bit me… am I going to become spiderman? No. This is Australia, you’re going to die.
Centrelink, Imagery, WineDrinking A Nice Wine: Drinking a nice wine while listening to classical music…
Beer, ChartsBeer Troubleshooting Chart: Beer Troubleshooting Chart.
Clippit, Imagery, Microsoft, Office, Paperclips, WorkIt Looks Like You Are Wasting Office Supplies. Would You Like Some Help?: Clippit: It looks like you are wasting office supplies. Would you like some help?
Australia, Democracy, Political, RacistThe Ant And The Grasshopper: The Original Story of the Ant and the Grasshopper.
Bikinis, Burqa, Imagery, Muslim, Racist, SexistWhat A Cruel Male-dominated Culture: It’s a male dominated culture, no matter how you look at it…
Imagery, RisquéAncient Japanese Proverb: Ancient Japanese Proverb. If you cannot understand Japanese, tilt your head to the right…
WorkRejection Response: The next time you get a rejection letter from a hoped-for employer or publisher, just send them the following…
Imagery, SexistDifference Between Men And Women: The difference between men and women…
Imagery, Topgear, TvIs There Anything Worse Than A Lego For Stepping On In The Middle Of The Night?: Is there anything worse than a Lego for stepping on in the middle of the night? A landmine.
Animals, Computer Games, Computers, Imagery, SpidersBravery: …in the face of spiders.
Board Games, ImageryMarry Me: Scrabble Edition.
Sexist, WorkDon’t Copy If You Can’t Paste: Don’t copy if you can’t paste…
Imagery, PoliceA Cop Just Pulled Me Over And Said “Papers”: A cop just pulled me over and said “Papers”… so I said “Scissors, I win” and drove off…
Animals, Horses, Imagery, Knights, Monty Python, Riding, TvCouldn’t Find My Coconut Shells.: Was gonna ride to work today. Couldn’t find my coconut shells.
ImageryThe Ego Boost Urinal: The Ego Boost Urinal.
Animals, Imagery, Spiders, ZombiesZombie Apocalypse Spider: I laugh at your claims to bravely take on a zombie apocalypse, when most of you can’t stand up to a spider.
Bones, Imagery, SkeletonsThe Average Human Body Contains Enough Bones: The average human body contains enough bones to make an entire human skeleton.
Jokes, Pool, Puns, Sport, TreesWhat’s Green, Fuzzy, And If It Fell Out Of A Tree It Would Kill You?: What’s green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you?
Animals, Imagery, Iphone, PhonesIt’s A Whale: How do you have any friends…
Computers, GeekyMicrosoft Lightbulb Jokes: Microsoft Lightbulb Jokes.
Apple, Imagery, Iphone, PhonesUpgrade Kit For IPhone 4 Owners: Upgrade kit for iPhone 4 owners. Only 99¢.
Sexist, WomenWords Women Use: Words women use, and what they really mean.
Emoji, Imagery, Phones, SmsEmoji: Alien blood transfusions are illegal for ghosts, but beach chickens win!
Medical, RisquéKeep Off The Grass: A Nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room, when a young woman with purple hair styled into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting a variety of tattoos, and wearing strange clothes, entered…
RisquéThe Hypnotist: It was entertainment night at the senior centre and the Amazing Claude was topping the bill…
English, Grammar, ImageryGrammar Matters: Two Google searches: One for “how can u” and one for “how can an individual”
Alcohol, Food, Imagery, VodkaVodka Diet: Lose 3 Days In 1 Week: Vodka Diet: Lose 3 Days in 1 Week.
ImageryMartha Stewart’s New Digs: Martha Stewart’s New Digs
Alligators, Animals, Crocodiles, Imagery, TurtlesTurtle Cavalry: Onward, alligator steed!
Animals, ImageryHow Dishwashers Really Work: How dishwashers really work…
Animals, Cats, Imagery, KittensNo Sitz: I be here!
Geeky, ImageryDrowning, LOL!: If you see someone drowning… LOL!
SexistGuts Or Balls?: We’ve all heard about men having guts or balls. But do you really know the difference between them?
Bathrooms, Imagery, SignsYou Look Fine: Instead of a mirror, a sign “you look fine”.
Accidents, Animals, Canada, Imagery, Moose, News, TvCanadian News: Canadian News: Quebec snowmobiler dies after driving under a moose.
Food, ImageryThrowing People: A tomato’s fear.
Actors, Famous People, Imagery, Movie Stars, Robert De NiroRobert De Niro, De Faro: First Robert De Niro, then Robert De Faro.
Babies, Imagery, PregnancyHow Babies Are Made: How babies are made (with an air pump).
Imagery, RisquéThe Exact Spot My Zipper Broke: The exact spot my zipper broke.
Clouds, Computers, Imagery, TechnologyWhat Are Clouds Made Of?: Daddy, what are clouds made of?
Imagery, StoneNothing Is Written In Stone: Nothing is Written in Stone…
Hippies, Imagery, ShirtsPassive Agressive Hippie: Passive Agressive Hippie: You want a [peace sign] of me?
Advertising, Apple, Computers, Geeky, Imagery, MacMac Weed: A take-off of the Apple Macintosh switch ads.
Animals, Birds, Imagery, Mirrors, ParrotsTap That: I’d tap that!
Geeky, Imagery, Scientific, UniversityHow People In Science See Each Other: How People in Science See Each Other.
Alcohol, Goon, Imagery, Logan, Police, RacistLargest Goon Bust In Logan’s History: Logan police in conjunction with the A.F.P. hauled in the largest goon bust in Logan’s history. With an estimated street value of $39.
America, Bear Arms, Constitution, Democracy, Imagery, Second AmendmentThe Second Amendment: The Right To Bear Arms: The second amendment gives Americans the right to bear arms. I think many have taken this out of context.
SexistMen’s Rules: We always hear the rules from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side…
Accidents, Food, ImageryMilkshake Meets Door: A woman runs into a door carrying two milkshakes.
Boobs, Imagery, Risqué, SexistAre Those Yours?: …they’re turning out so big and cute!
Animals, Cats, ImageryCat Bag: It’s a cat bag. Not too sure what else to say about this…
Acrobats, Books, ImageryAcrobat Reader: An acrobat reader…
Illusion, ImageryShake Your Head: Shake your head
Alcohol, ImagerySlimming Drink: You look so much better after a glass or two!
Geeky, SexistDear Tech Support: Girlfriend technical support…
Crocs, Friday The 13th, Imagery, Jason Voorhees, Movies, ShoesJason Voorhees Gets Crocs: Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) gets Crocs.
GeekySpellcheck Not Needed: Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy…
Bsod, Clippit, Computers, Geeky, Imagery, Microsoft, WindowsWindows: Windows. Still the most used operating system, and undoubtedly the most abused.
Emergency, Imagery, Out Of OrderEmergency: Out Of Order: Please do not have an emergency!
Geeky, MusicWhat If The Beatles Had Been Computer Freaks?: What if the Beatles had been computer freaks?
☺Perfect Existence: Perfect Existence: The Proof
Apple, Imagery, Iphone, Iphone 6, PhonesIPhone 6 Comparison: iPhone 6 Plus Comparison.
GeekyIf Dr Seuss Was A Technical Writer: If Dr Seuss Was A Technical Writer.
Computers, Geeky, ImageryKeyboards: Amusing Keyboards
Cycling, Drugs, SportI Think It Is Just Terrible And Disgusting How Everyone Has Treated Lance Armstrong: I think it is just terrible and disgusting how everyone has treated Lance Armstrong, especially after what he achieved, winning seven Tour de France races while on drugs. When I was on drugs, I couldn’t even find my bike.
Computers, Sms, WindowsWindows Frozen: Wife texts husband on a cold winter’s morning, “Windows frozen.”
Australia, Imagery, Matches, Pauline Hanson, Political, Redheads, RednecksRednecks: Redneck Matches…
Education, Imagery, School, TeachersExplain These Bad Grades: 1969: A child’s parents blame him for his bad grades. Today: A child’s parents blame his teacher for his bad grades.
Advertising, Feminine Hygiene, Imagery, Risqué, Sexist, Tampons, VintageThe Girls Are Talking About Tampons: The Blonde: It’s invisible sanitary protection, thank heavens…
Cooking, Frypans, ImageryNon-stick Frypan: A stuck non-stick frypan…
Imagery, Signs, SpringSpring Is Here. I’m So Excited I Wet My Plants!: Spring is here. I’m so excited I wet my plants!
Campervans, Camping, Cars, ImageryNot A Happy Camper: Not a Happy Camper.
Animated, Flash, Illusion, ImageryIllusions: Warning: May induce epilepsy or cardiac arrest…
Animals, Bears, Guns, ImageryWhat Is The Smallest Calibre You Trust To Protect Yourself?: I remember one time while hiking with my girlfriend in northern Alberta and out of nowhere came this huge brown bear charging us, and was she mad!
Blonde, Imagery, SexistBlonde Geometry: Attached is problem 3 on a geometry examination…
Animals, Geeky, Imagery, Math, SnakesSnakes On A Plane: Snakes on a plane.
Imagery, SpicesSeasons Greetings: Seasons Greetings
Imagery, Risqué, SupermanSuper Boner: Super-boner: A super problem.
RacistFerrari Sack Pit Crew: The Ferrari Formula 1 Team fired their entire pit crew yesterday…
Coolers, Imagery, SexistIf A Man Says He Will Fix It, He Will: If a man says he will fix it, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months.
Bananas, Food, Imagery, SuicideSuicidal Bananas: A collection of suicidal bananas.
ImageryMcDonald’s Reaches Africa: McDonald’s reaches Africa.
Browsers, Chrome, Firefox, Geeky, Imagery, Internet, Internet ExplorerBrowser Wars: Browser Wars: Chrome versus Firefox… and Internet Explorer…
Babies, Children, Daycare, Imagery, Logan, RacistLogan Daycare: Logan Daycare: Just for the whole day
☺A Middle-aged Woman Decides To Have A Facelift…: A middle-aged woman decides to have a facelift…
Computers, ImageryAlready Exists: skdjaskdhsajdahsdjashds.jpg already exists. Do you want to replace it? You've got to be kidding me.
Books, ImageryMystery Books: You have to find them first…
Beer, Imagery, RacistHow People From Around The World Open Beer: People from around the world opening beer in their own unique ways.
Self-checkout, Shopping, Technology, TerminatorUnexpected Item In Bagging Area.: It’s not unexpected, you literally just told me what it is…
Imagery, School24 Chickens: 24 Chickens: The shoe rack at the front door…
Famous People, Imagery, Movie StarsReese Witherspoon: Reese Withoutherspoon.
Facebook, Imagery, RisquéFacebook Sex: Taking status updates too far.
Imagery, Kitchens, Sexist, WomenFor Too Long The Voice Of Women Has Been Silenced: For too long the voice of women has been silenced. It’s time they had microphones in kitchens.
Bikes, Imagery, NoticesBicycles Chained To These Railings Will Be Removed Without Notice.: Bicycles chained to these railings will be removed without notice. This is a notice, you idiot!
Animals, Dogs, ImageryHow The Hell Is The Ball Still In Your Hand?: How the hell is the ball still in your hand?
ImageryFurniture Training: Furniture training for one of their main purposes in life…
Animated, Flash, Geeky, ImageryL33t H4x0r H4ml37: Tales for the L33T PATR TOO - HAMLET
ImageryButtons: Lots of buttons…
ImageryMicrophone Eyes: Microphone Eyes.
Cosmetics, ImageryPapercut Locator: Papercut Locator.
Aztecs, Imagery, Mayans, OreosMayan, Aztec And Oreos: Mayan, Aztec and Oreos…
Computers, Evolution, ImagerySomething Went Terribly Wrong: Something, somewhere went terribly wrong.
ImageryBefore Tweeting: In case of fire: Exit building before tweeting about it.
Farmers, Imagery, Men, Swimming, WomenThe Clever Old Man: One evening an old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn’t been there for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny dipping in his pond…
Animals, Broomsticks, Cars, Frogs, Imagery, Parking, Princesses, WitchesAll Others Will Be Toad: Private customer parking only. All others will be toad.
Fruit, Grapes, ImageryBeware The Grapes Of Wrath: Beware the Grapes of Wrath.
Beer, Geeky, Imagery, WorkUltimate Camouflage: An office beer fridge…
C Sharp, Developers, Geeky, Imagery, Java, ProgrammersWhy Do Java Developers Wear Glasses?: Why do Java developers wear glasses? Because they don’t C#!
Computers, GeekyRandom Number: A simple function to return a random number.
Animals, Imagery, SealsSeal This Opening: I was told to seal this opening, so here I am.
Imagery, RisquéThumb War: One, two three, four. I declare a thumb war…
Awards, Imagery, Jobs, Roads, WorkThe Winner Of The “Not My Job” Award: The Winner of the “Not My Job” Award goes to…
Bones, ImageryI Found This Humerus: I found this humerus.
Hats, Imagery, SportYou Can’t Beat Stupid…: I wish they would invent something to keep the sun out of my eyes…
Imagery, RisquéHebrew Cave Paintings: Written across the wall of the cave were the following symbols…
Advertising, Australia, Billboards, CarsRAC Roadside Assistance Meltdown: You don’t want to be stuck out here.
Animals, Bunnies, Imagery, RabbitsEmo Bunny: Emo bunny: No one ever understands him
Animals, Imagery, SlugsFeeling Sluggish: I’ve been feeling a bit sluggish…
Imagery, Posters, ScienceLost Wormhole: Do not attempt capture because you’ll totally screw with the space/time continuum bro.
Ice, Imagery, MindpowerMelt Ice With My Mind: I can melt ice with my mind… just give me a few minutes…
Animated, ImagerySpiderman: If Spiderman was a gay night-clubber…
Olympics, Racist, SportAthens Olympic Soccer Stadium: The Athens Olympic Stadium…
Animals, Joke, PigsThree Little Piggies: Three Little Pigs went out to dinner one night…
Apple, Imagery, Iphone, Iphone 6, PhonesIPhone 6 Repair Kit: iPhone 6 repair kit.
Cars, ImageryPolished My Car Too Much: Polished my car too much, now it’s invisible…
English, Grammar, QuotationsAmusing Quotes & One-Liners: Amusing Quotes & One-Liners.
Fans, Metal, MusicMetal Fan: What kind of music do you like? I am a huge metal fan. Me too!
Animals, Cats, Ducks, Imagery, Robots, Sharks, VacuumsRobot Vacuum Cat Shark Duck Chase: Robot Vacuum Cat Shark Duck Chase.
Cartoons, ImageryFor A Good Time: For a good time, call…
ImageryBribing Santa: Dear Santa, if you leave a new bike under the tree, I will give you the antidote to the poison I put in the milk.
Imagery, ReligiousBelieve In Reincarnation: Yeah, well, I didn’t believe in reincarnation when I was your age, either.
Halloween, Imagery, Pumpkins, VegetablesAngry Pumpkin Man: Angry Pumpkin Man: Come at me bro!
☺Out Of Breath: Dispatcher: Emergency Services, how may I help you?
Imagery, PunsThe Highest Form Of Flattery: Plateaus: The highest form of flattery.
Cars, Imagery, StickersF It: F-it
Hammer, ImageryStop! Hammer Time: Stop! Hammer Time!
Animated, Flash, Geeky, ImageryL33t H4x0r R0m30 4nd Jul13t: Tales for the L33T - ROMEO+JULIET
Comics, ImageryHorton Hears The Who: Horton Hears the Who
Facebook, Geeky, Imagery, InternetGoogle+ Versus Facebook: Google Plus versus Facebook
Imagery, Risqué, SignsNo Public Motor Boating Permitted: No public motor boating permitted.
Imagery, SexistWomen: Yes, No, Maybe…: I think I have that women-talk all figured out…
Animals, Fish, Imagery, Love, Romance, SmsAnyways, Best Of Luck Finding Your Fish: Long story short, we’re in love. I know it seems sudden but life is sudden like that, you know? Anyways, best of luck finding your fish.
Imagery, Keith Urban, MusiciansKeith Urban Accepted As Genuine Humanoid: Clint Felmingham: Did you know? Keith Urban is accepted by many Americans as a genuine humanoid/musician. Urban, a polymer composite (90% polyethene, 8% alcohol, 2% minor celebrity), was manufactured in Caboolture, Australia in 1987..

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